燃情克利夫兰

Hot in Cleveland S04E21

Part 2 May 5, 2020, 8:57 a.m.

Oh, God, I hope not.
"亲爱的蔡斯·维多利亚
"Dear Chase Victoria,
尿失禁的国际形象代言人
international face of incontinence...
最新的小泽工业兄弟产品
Let us safely and effortlessly
能够轻松安全的为您的腹部
electrocute your abdomen into shape
电击塑形
with newest Ozawa Brothers product,
这就是女汉子腹肌
Mrs. Lady Abs.
附上你的薪酬
Also enclosed is your check money."
天哪瞧这些零
Oh, my God. Look at all those zeroes.
我兴奋得都快尿失禁了
Oh, I could really use those ladypants right now.
喂
Hello.
斯克罗格女士你好吗
Oh, hi, Ms. Scroggs, how are you?
-我不在 -不
- I'm not here. - Oh... no.
瑞乔依娜不在她在马戏团
Rejoyla's not here. She's... at the circus.
因为她和空中飞女是朋友
Because she's friends with the trapeze lady.
我会告诉她你来过电♥话♥了
I'll just tell her you called.
今晚我可怎么过
How am I gonna get through this evening?
我最不会撒谎了
I am a terrible liar.
把周三说成周二那事你倒是很熟练啊
You did okay with that Tuesday-Wednesday thing.
猜猜是谁穿了大家都
Guess who's wearing something wonderful
看不到的好东西
that no one can see?
那叫胸罩好不
It's called a bra.
别纠结了
Get over it.
我说的是我的女士健腹腰带
I was referring to my Mrs. Lady Abs toning belt,
它能不断发射数万股微电子脉冲
which is sending thousands of tiny electrical pulses,
收紧我的小腹
tightening my abs as we speak.
而且这腰带做工平滑
And the belt is so smooth
没...没...没人知道你戴着它
that n... n... n... nobody knows you're wearing it.
维多利亚你开到第几档
Victoria, what number did you set that thing on?
我昨晚几乎感觉不到脉冲
Well, last night I could hardly feel it,
就开到了最高档
so I turned it up to the highest setting,
超级无敌腹肌速成模式
"Super max-fry muscle scramble,"
可能一直卡在最高档...档...档了
and I guess it got stuck on the n... n... n... number.
准备了梅米·苏
Come on, Mamie Ssue,
我们要去拿人开涮了
we've got a roast to go to.
是的喝杯酒壮壮胆
Right. Here's your drink.
极品
Perfect.
你喝的是纯伏特加吗
Was that straight vodka?
我整人之前先要放松放松
I like to be loose before I do a set.
那是在哈利七岁生日上
So that was Harry's seventh birthday.
我还忘了和你说生日蛋糕了
Oh, I didn't tell you about the cake.
是巧克力做的
It was chocolate.
不表面是用巧克力糖霜涂成白色的
No, it was white with chocolate frosting.
晕你看我这记性
No, what am I thinking?
那是个生日吃的是馅饼
That was a pie birthday.
我能和梅兰妮聊几句吗
Could I steal Melanie for a second?
当然拜托
Yes, please.
我摊上大事了
I have a big problem.
格林利医生来了
Dr. Greenly is here.
-谁 -那个让我
- Who? - The shrink I had
魂牵梦绕最后不得不
to stop seeing 'cause I was having
放弃治疗的心理医生
all those sexy dreams about him.
-人在哪 -火炉旁边
- Oh, where? - Over by the fireplace.
别转身
Don't turn around.
完了他看见我了他过来了
Ah, he saw me. He's coming over.
你好乔依真没想到啊
Hi, Joy. This is a surprise.
是的这位是我朋友梅兰妮
Yes. This is my friend Melanie.
我对您深表同情
My heart goes out to you.
为啥啊
Why? Oh...
谢谢
Thank you.
哈利曾是我的病人
Harry was a patient of mine.
他和我说过很多你的事
He spoke at great length about you.
那可不是
I bet he did.
梅兰妮来见见贝丝堂姐
Melanie, come meet cousin Beth.
她刚从墨西哥城[西班牙语]飞来
She's just flown in from Mejico.
那个啥乔依
So, Joy...
那个啥格林利医生
So, Dr. Greenly...
我不是想让你难堪
I don't mean to put you on the spot,
但我实在想知道你为什么要放弃治疗
but I always wondered why you suddenly stopped seeing me.
咱们的治疗进展还不错
We were making such great progress.
我是说关于你和你父亲之间的问题
You know, really getting into some of the issues
已经有点眉目了
that you had with your father.
我能实话实说吗
Can I be perfectly honest?
求之不得
Of course.
这话听着有点俗
I know it's the biggest clich?
可我还是要和你坦白
but I can tell you now
因为你已经不是我的医生了
since you're no longer my doctor.
我被你深深吸引
I was attracted to you.
那我想我也可以对你坦白了
Well, I guess I can tell you,
因为你也不再是我的病人了
since you're no longer my patient,
我同样被你所吸引
that I was attracted to you.
听着忘掉格林利医生的口吻
You know, speaking not as Dr. Greenly,
现在和你说话的人叫约翰
but just as a guy named John,
啥时有空一起吃晚饭吗
would you like to have dinner sometime?
我愿意去
I would, John.
双关语 Join发音近似约翰
但我还想和格林利医生说最后一句话
But could I speak to Dr. Greenly for just one second?
没问题
Sure.
我能帮你什么忙吗乔依
How can I help you, Joy?
格林利医生鉴于我在男人身上的经历
Dr. Greenly, given my history with men,
你觉得我应该和上任心理医生约会吗
do you think I should date my former therapist?
我看行
I do.
刚才那哥们貌似很聪明
Wow, that guy seemed really smart.
乔依能到厨房♥说句话吗
Joy, could I see you in the kitchen?
-现在吗 -是的现现在
- Right now? - Yes, right n... n... n... now.
我从没主持过守丧
I never hosted a wake before.
你知道这种活动通常要多长时间吗
Do you know how long these things generally go?
不长
Oh, not long.
你一开始念追悼词
People should start to drift out
大伙儿就该准备撤了
soon after you give the eulogy.
电击越来越严重了
The shocks are getting worse.
我脱不下来钩子坏了
I can't get it off. The latch is broken.
你们猜是谁来念悼词
Guess who's giving the eulogy.
不是吧
Seriously?
你跟他们说你愿意念追悼词吗
You said you'd give the eulogy?
我不记得我说过
I don't remember doing it,
但他的家人实在太无聊了
but his family is so boring.
你一走神再等他们的嘴巴闭上之后
You zone out, and when their mouths stop moving,
你就会不由自主地点头
you just nod your head.
再跟他们说不行呗
So now say no.
我不能詹森就指望着我了
I can't. Jason is depending on me.
-詹森是谁 -我不知道
- Who's Jason? - I don't know.
我该说些什么
What am I gonna say?
我不知道
Well, I don't know.
但我如果不赶紧把这玩意解下来
But if I don't get this thing off soon,
你就该念我的追悼词了
you're gonna be giving my eulogy.
写你的追悼词一定很有趣
See, your eulogy would be fun to write.
我对你是付出了真感情的
I have genuine feelings for you.
哈利的家人期待的
Harry's family is expecting
是伤心的未婚妻写的追悼词
a grieving fiancee eulogy,
可事实上我几乎不了解他
and the truth is I barely knew the man.
我怎么闻见爆米花味了
Why do I smell popcorn?
为了解开这个东西
I tried to get this thing off
我试着往身上涂黄油
by buttering myself,
但现在我在油炸自己
and now I'm cooking.
作为一个心理医生我要是一团糟
So as a professional you wouldn't date me
你就不会和我约会了是吧
if I was really screwed up, would you?
别再试探了
Stop fishing.
抱歉
Sorry.
没事是我母亲的电♥话♥
Oof. It's nothing. It's my mother.
虽然有一定的风险再变回格林利医生
At the risk of sounding like Dr. Greenly,