高玩救未来

Future Man S01E08

Part 2 April 11, 2020, 11:02 a.m.

-在哪里的街头呢 -硬汉拓展营
- On the streets of... - Hard knocks.
加利福尼亚的呢还是芝加哥
Hard knocks California or like hard knocks Chicago.
霍索恩在那里出生长大
Hawthorne, born and raised.
不过后来我放弃了跳舞
But I... I gave up on the dancing,
放弃了很多
gave up on a lot of things.
曾经我坠入爱河
I was in love once.
在很多很多年前
Many, many years ago.
-跟玛丽戈尔德吗 -不是
- With Marigold? - No.
我与她之间一直以来
That is, as it's always been,
都没有爱
a loveless relationship.
我很确定她出轨了
I'm pretty sure she cheated on me.
我也曾经被其他人诱惑过
And I too was tempted by the fruit of another.
莱斯利
Leslie.
甜美可人的莱斯利
Sweet, sweet Leslie.
那艘船是莱斯利送我的36岁礼物
That boat was Leslie's 36th birthday present to me.
而且还邀请我乘船驶入新生活
And with it came an offer to sail away into a new life.
我们那天准备出海
We were to set sail that day.
你的生日是在夏天吗
So your birthday, that... was that the summertime?
毕竟如果是冬天
I mean, you don't really embark
应该不会踏上这样的旅程
on a journey like that during the winter.
6月24日不过这不是重点
June 24th, but you're missing the point.
我本可以在塞舌尔开一家潜水用品店
I could've had a little scuba shop in the Seychelles,
安安静静过一生
living a quiet life.
你吃过海螺油炸果吗福特曼
You ever taste conch fritter, Futterman?
那他妈才叫美味
Woo, God damn delicious.
这个现在也还吃得到
Well, you can still enjoy those.
在洛杉矶哪有好吃的海螺
You can't get good conch in L. A.
而且也绝对没有莱斯利了
And you definitely can't find Leslie.
我当初为什么不听从自己的内心
Why didn't I listen to my heart?
现在成了68岁老大爷充满后悔
Now I'm just a 68-year-old quilt of regret,
毫无活力还患有疱疹
stitched together with herpes and inertia.
我就是颓废一下
Ah, I'm just wallowing.
明天就恢复工作
Tomorrow, back to work.
我能跟你拍张照吗
Can I take a photo with you?
要是拿来做"史上最棒老板"马克杯那就可以
If it's for the World's Greatest Boss mug, then yes.
谢谢是想留个纪念
Thank you, it's a keepsake.
再拍一张要搞怪一点
Oh, another one, but... but goofy.
-这样我们都能开心些 -好
- It'll cheer us both up. - Okay.
加布加布
Gabe, Gabe...
是有人攻击你们吗
have you been attacked?
他们带走了她
They took her.
他们带走了我的宝贝
They took my cupcake.
说有什么谋杀案
Said there was a murder,
1969年的一个警♥察♥ 还有几个毒贩子
something about a cop in 1969, some drug dealers,
完全说不通啊
it didn't make any sense.
-是谁带走她的 -警♥察♥
- Who took her? - The cops!
他们说有她的DNA
They said they had her DNA,
好像是她做的DNA检测一切都太快了
some DNA test she took, it all happened so fast.
好
Okay.
听我说爸
All right, Dad,
我问你一个很重要的问题好吗
I'm gonna ask you a very important question, all right?
那些警♥察♥长得有多好看
How good looking were the cops?
什么
What?!
他们长得性感吗
Like, were they hot or not?
比如1到10来评分
On a scale of 1 to 10,
他们是9还是更高
were they a 9 or higher?
我不知道我不太好判断这个
I don't know, it's kinda tough for me to gauge.
那好吧
Okay, um...
我问你你能想到最性感的人是谁
Okay, who's the hottest person you can think of?
你妈妈
Your mother.
好了爸
Okay, Dad,
妈妈现在不在这里
Mom isn't here right now,
你可以说实话
you can be honest with me.
你妈妈是10分
Your mother is a 10.
她最多也就6分
She's a 6 at best!
你给我收回这句话
You take that back.
爸你听我说听我说好吗
Dad, Dad, you... listen to me, okay, listen to me.
请你告诉我那些警♥察♥好不好看
Now, tell me, were the cops hot or not?
我不知道也许有一个
I don't know, maybe one of them had a certain
感觉还行
way about them.
肯定是生化人
It had to be Biotics.
听我说杰莉提到会有杀戮小队来
Guys, Jeri said a strike team was coming.
现在他们抓了我妈当人♥质♥
And now they've taken my mom as bait!
-不是生化人 -有可能是
- It's not Biotics. - It could be.
她说不定已经死了
For all we know she's dead.
没事的加布
It's okay, Gabe!
找个人替她就行
You just have to replace her.
比如万达
Perhaps with Wanda!
我不想找人替她
I don't want to replace her.
可她很会口♥交♥啊
She gives great blow jobs.
我妈被掳走了而且事情因我而起
Guys, my mom is gone, and I'm responsible for that.
如果救不回她
Okay, if we can't get her back,
如果她有个三长两短
if something happens to her, that's...
那就都怪我
that's all my fault!
我会无法忍♥受自己
I can't live with myself.
我们必须救出戴安
We have to rescue Diane.
-什么 -你看看周围
- What? - Look around.
他们邀请我们进了家
They welcomed us into their family,
可我们却把它搞得支离破碎
and we are just tearing it apart.
你不是说忘了这些人
What happened to forgetting these people
回去吃伪圣诞节猫肉猎杀鳄鱼吗
and getting back to Festivus cats and sport gators?
把日期给我们
Give us the date.
如果生化人抓了戴安
If Biotics have Diane,
那我们绝对不能自投罗网
the last thing we wanna do is walk into that trap.
-把日期给我 -不不要
- Give me the date. - No, no!
那我就割开你的肚子找
I'll cut it out of your stomach.
暴狼住手
Wolf, stop.
我擦
Fuck.
咽不下去
I couldn't swallow it.
我们要去救戴安
We're going to rescue Diane.
不管是警♥察♥还是生化人
Whether it's police or it's Biotics,
我们不能丢下她
we are not leaving her behind,
这才是伪圣诞节的真正意义
and that is the true meaning of Festivus.
什么
What?
我给你讲个关于戴安的小故事吧戴安
Let me tell you a little story about a girl named Diane, Diane.
当时是六十年代
It was the '60s.
人们充满各种想法
A lot of ideas in the air.
有些人想要创造出更好的社会
Some people wanted to create a great society,
而有些人则想一把火烧掉
some wanted to watch it burn.
我当时加入了和平队
I was in the Peace Corps.
因此你才学会憎恨黑人
Which is exactly where you learned to hate black people.
在南美洲吗
In South America?
好吧憎恨拉丁美洲人
Fine, Latinos!
憎恨叫这些名字的人比如...
People with names like, I don't know,
荷西·桑迪亚哥
Jorge Santiago.
荷西是你的搭档吧你失去的人
Jorge was your partner, the one you lost?
你怎么会知道这件事
And how would you know that?
你刚才说过很多次
Well, you've mentioned it several times.
大概你自己都没意识到吧
I don't even think you know you're doing it.
我会一直说直到你帮我搞清一加一
I'm gonna keep doing it until you help me add up one plus one!
因为我加出来总是三
'Cause I keep coming up with three!
顺便说一句你老了不少
You've aged magnificently, by the way.
那不是我
Well, that's not me.
你可以看看你在冰♥毒♥实验室留下的DNA
Tell that to the DNA you left at the meth lab.
与你提交给DN耶的DNA
It matches perfectly to the DNA
完全匹配
that you submitted to DN-Yay.
DN耶
DN-Yay?
我没去测试过
Well, I never did a test.
别骗我戴安
Don't lie to me, Diane.
我等这条狐狸尾巴等了48年
I've spent 48 years waiting for a slip.