人人都爱雷蒙德（1996）

Everybody Loves Raymond S08E04

Part 1 Nov. 24, 2020, 12:04 p.m.

Hey debra I'm glad you're here.
黛布拉真高兴你在这儿
Tomorrow believe it or not
信不信由你明天
Is amy's and my three-month anniversary.
是我跟艾米结婚三周月纪念日
Oh! what time's the parade?
那游♥行♥什么时候开始啊
And we would like to have you debra
我俩希望你能来黛布拉
Over to celebrate and you can bring somebody.
来我们的庆祝仪式并且你也可以带上某人
Oh that's sweet.
那太好了
can't make it. we'll be there.
不可能我们会去的
nope. yup.
不去去
Do the laundry.
自己洗衣服吧
How about I shrink your underwear
信不信我洗到你内♥裤♥缩水
And make you think your butt's going fat?
让你以为自己屁♥股♥又大了
Trouble in paradise?
在天堂有麻烦了?
No just wednesday in paradise.
没有只是今天是天堂的星期三
care for some advice? no.
给你点建议怎样别
I'll tell you what I've found
我已经知道
To be the key to a happy marriage.
幸福婚姻的秘诀是什么了
Says the man who married a stripper
秘诀就是一个人跟脱衣舞娘结婚了
Then divorced a stripper
接着跟她离婚了
Then married a regular person
然后又跟一个普通人结婚
And hung in there a whole three months.
然后总共维持这段婚姻三个月
Want a happy marriage?
什么才是幸福的婚姻
Hold hands.
执子之手
Hold hands?
执子之手?
Hold hands.
执子之手
You are a stupid person.
你可真是个笨蛋
I'm serious.
我是认真的
Something as simple as holding hands
一些像执子之手这么简单的概念
Could give someone a sense of togetherness.
就能给某人归属感了
Stop it.
够了
You are so afraid of affection.
你很抗拒心中的感情
You don't touch me.
你别碰我
Raymond raymond raymond you're so closed off.
雷蒙德你太封闭自己了
Holding your wife's hand could be pleasurable for you
握住太太的手能让你愉悦
And more importantly
并且更重要的是
It might allow her to feel wanted and loved by you.
能让她知道你对她的爱以及需求
How does that get me out of laundry?
怎么样才能令我不用洗衣服
If you could connect with your wife emotionally
假如你能在精神层面上与妻子取得共鸣
Then perhaps you wouldn't see doing laundry as a chore.
也许你就不会觉得洗衣服是零星活儿了
You might do it willingly...
你就会为了对她的爱
For her as a gesture of love.
而心甘情愿去做
You are an idiot wrapped in a moron.
你可真是个包在傻子皮里面的笨蛋
A good and healthy marriage.
我告诉你的是我如何维持一段良好并且健康的婚姻
Yeah well wrap it up to-go.
知道我会打包带走的
Fine. I found something that works
好啊我找到些有用的东西
I'm trying to pass it on
试着跟你们共享
But hey if you're happy with the way things are...
但似乎你们已经习惯安于现状了
What's this for?
这是干嘛
You're a boob.
你是个笨蛋
I'm sorry ray. I'm not in the mood.
抱歉雷我没心情
I just-just want to hold your hand.
我只是...只是想牵着你的手
Why?
为什么
I've got to have a reason?
牵手需要理由的吗
I wanted to hold your hand so I want to hold your hand.
我想牵所以就牵了
Oh. okay.
是吗好吧
I need to turn the page.
我要翻页了
Stupid robert.
笨蛋罗伯特
What?
怎么了
He gave me advice... "hold hands."
他给我的建议是...执子之手
Okay so I tried. you obviously don't like it...
然后我试过但很明显你不喜欢牵手
Stupid robert.
笨蛋罗伯特
Robert gave you advice?
罗伯特给你提建议?
Yeah marriage advice.
是啊婚姻的建议
To me.
给我
About marriage.
关于婚姻的
Advice.
建议
To me.
给我
So that was robert's advice you were trying?
那么你刚才只是在试验罗伯特的提议咯?
Yeah yeah "hold hands."
是啊是啊执子之手
He's married three months he's on the lecture circuit.
他才结婚三个月还在乐于授道的阶段
So you were trying to do something for our marriage?
那么你是想为我们的婚姻做点什么咯
Yep. I'm going to call him and tell him how it went.
是的我要告诉他进展如何
No no no.
不不不
Listen i-i didn't realize.
我...我没意识到
come on. let's try again. what?
来吧再来一次什么
Yeah come on. why not?
是啊来吧何不呢
I thought you were trying to have sex or something
我还以为你是想做♥爱♥或什么的
but this is nice.
不过这样很好
yeah? yeah.
是吗是啊
Yeah and this I can do a long time.
没错这样我能撑更持久
just one thing
跟你说个事
would you mind not scrunching it? what?
不要碾它好吗什么
Yeah I forgot you have this way of lining up my knuckles
忘了说了你会把我的关节排行
And kind of grinding them.
然后不断的碾它们
oh. sorry. that's all right.
不好意思没事
That's probably why I don't hold hands more.
那或许就是为什么我不喜欢常牵手吧
That's not why.
那不是原因
Yes yes it is. that's why...
是的那是那就是原因...
The terrible pain.
很疼的啊
Well I mean give me something.
好吧我想说的是给我点反应啊
Your hand's just laying there.
你的手只是躺在那儿
What do you mean "just laying there"?
什么意思 "只是躺在那儿"?
This is not holding hands.
这不是牵手
This is laying it on there.
手只是躺在那儿
Maybe my hand's afraid of you so it's playing dead.
也许我的手怕你所以它装死
Well if anything I'm trying to give it cpr
如果是那我就给"尸体心脏"先生
Mr. cadaver hand.
来个心脏复苏
All right see? I knew this wouldn't work.
好了知道吗我就知道这没用
There's no point in doing something like this. you know why?
这样做根本没意思你知道为什么吗
Because you actually like being mad at me.
因为你就喜欢对着我抓狂
what?! yes you do.
什么是的你是
It's fun for you or something.
那样对你来说很好玩
You actually prefer it that way.
事实上你是那样对我的
oh I don't believe you! see?
我才不信你呢! 你看
You're mad just like you like.
你抓狂了就像你喜欢的那样
Ray if I'm mad it's not because I enjoy it.
雷我抓狂并不是因为我喜欢那样
Well why then?
是吗然后呢
Because for the first time in 10 years
因为这是我们结婚十年来
You hold my hand but it's only because
你第一次牵我手但这仅仅是因为
You want to prove your brother wrong.
你想证明你哥是错的
And then you say I'm grinding it up
然后你说我要把你的手碾碎了
Because I enjoy being mad.
因为我喜欢抓狂
Forget it forget it.
算了算了
Everything is fine and you are perfect.
什么都没发生你很完美
Who's robert to give you advice?
罗伯特给你建议算什么啊
You don't need advice from anybody.
你根本就不需要
deb... I said forget it.
黛布... 我说算了
No look... look I'm sorry okay?
我...我很抱歉好吗
That wasn't the only reason I did it...
我那样做并不是单纯的想
Just to prove robert wrong.
证明罗伯特是错的
I-i also did it...
我那样做还因为...
To help our marriage.
想改善我们的关系
Okay? 'cause we have a good healthy marriage
好吗因为我们有段很美好很健康的婚姻
That I'm very much into.
我很享受这段婚姻
Very much.
非常享受
You can stop now.
你可以住口了
Oh come on.
来嘛
Come on.
来嘛
You know you still love mr. cadaver mcfloppyhand.
你知道你还爱着"尸体心脏"先生
Stop it.
住手