大城小妞（2014）

Broad City S03E04

Part 3 Oct. 14, 2020, 10:13 a.m.

身
♪ Two peas in a pod ♪
我俩真像
♪ And neither of us are Jews ♪
都不是犹太人
You should Uber.
你该用优步
That's, um, German, right?
那是德语对吧
Sorry, but this obviously isn't you.
抱歉但这明显不是你
Yeah, obviously.
废话当然不是了
You thought a young Denzel Washington
你以为年轻时的丹泽尔·华盛顿
was gonna show up for your Tinder date?
会来和你进行Tinder约会吗
You shoulda just swiped left.
你该直接向左划的
Wait, what do you mean "Swipe left"?
等下 "向左划"是什么意思
Jellicle cat,
亲爱的猫
I need you to find and kill this ballsack, rat bastard.
我需要你找到并干掉这只多毛的鼠杂碎
In use! Ilana, it's me.
有人阿♥拉♥娜是我
Oh, come in.
进来
Dude, oh my God!
姐们儿天啊
Did you know that you can, like, swipe left on Tinder?
你知道在Tinder上可以向左划吗
And that means you're not into the guy.
代表你对那人不感兴趣
I thought you had to meet-up with every--
我以为需要和每个人
You have options.
你有选择的
What's happening in here?
什么情况
The cat's out of the bag.
猫从袋子里出来了
Jellicle was not easy to remove from the bodega.
让亲爱的离开超♥市♥可不容易
But I gotta catch this piece of shit, rat bastard,
但我一定要抓住这个王八蛋鼠杂碎
And I needed backup.
我需要支援
So, I had to borrow him.
我只有把他借过来了
Or her.
或者是她
What you?
你是男是女
Well, I kinda hope it's a guy
我有点希望是个公的
because there's literally zero good guys here.
因为这里一个好男人都没有
I need to meet, like, real men in real life
我需要在现实生活中和非同事的
that I don't work with. Yeah.
真实的男人见面是啊
What?
什么
That I don't, like, work it with.
不和我共同解决问题的人
You know?
你懂吗
Totally. That's what I meant to say.
完全我就是这个意思
Well, please let this work.
求让这招奏效
No, it's totally going to,
肯定会的
because cats can be scary vicious.
因为猫可以很恐怖凶狠
Come on, Jellicle cat,
拜托亲爱的猫
Scheme, make some fucking trouble.
搞点阴谋制♥造♥点混乱
Like, Tom and Jerry.
像《猫和老鼠》那样
Oh, my God, the media,
天啊媒体
reducing even cats to a stereotype.
连猫都墨守成规了
See, I have to remember, I am the problem.
你明白吗我得时刻记住我就是问题
Up next, you'll savor chilled chocolate-covered cherry
下一道美食冷冻巧克力樱桃
slivers your tongue didn't know that it needed.
将震撼你们的味觉
Enjoy.
慢慢品尝
I am crushin' it right now.
我太出色了
I'm definitely gonna be the Chop'd Champion tonight. Yes.
今晚我肯定会成为Chop'd[餐厅]冠军的是的
What? The rat just ran over my foot.
怎么了老鼠刚从我脚上跑过
You know the band Ratatat?
你们知道那个砰砰声乐队吗
Let's listen to thatatat, mm-hmm.
我们来听点塔塔声
Oh, if I have to see another tin-dude,
如果我还要再见一个Tinder男
I'm gonna fucking break out.
我特么就要爆发了
Hi, I am looking for a Larry and David gift basket
嗨我在找一个拉里&大卫的礼品篮子
that was dropped off here.
放在这里的
I, I, dropped it off, but at the wrong address,
我留在了错误的地址
And I need it back now.
我需要找回来
My money. My parents.
我的钱我的父母
My chef's high.
我做厨师的快♥感♥
My...
我的
My, my.
天啊
How you doing?
你好吗
So, what are you saying? It didn't come from Guatemala?
你什么意思这不是从危地马拉寄来的
No, I'm sorry.
不是我很抱歉
This is 215 10th street.
这是第十街215号♥
And I was supposed to deliver it to 210 15th street.
而我该送往第十五街210号♥
I keep messing up because I have dyslexia.
我总是搞混因为我有阅读障碍
Please, this is an SOS.
拜托了这是紧急状况
I'm sorry, SOS.
不好意思紧急求助
Dude, I'm so sorry but we got the basket,
哥们儿我很抱歉我们拿到了篮子
and I already made some incredible--
我已经做了一些巨大的
Strides.
改善
Strides.
改善
To keep the basket in mint condition.
为了保证篮子完好无损
So, you know, we're just gonna need a couple minutes
所以我们只需要一点时间
to fill out some paperwork.
填一些文件
You seem stressed. Why don't you come in?
你看上去有点紧张进来坐坐吧
You guys figure out the paperwork.
你们去准备文件
I'll show you around.
我带你转转
I mean, with letters and everything,
有了字母什么的
it's like, who cares what order they're in?
谁还在乎它们的顺序啊
Steven.
斯蒂文
Yeah, I shaved my mustache
我把我的小胡子刮了
with the pubey girl razor from the bathroom.
用的卫生间里的女用刮阴毛剃刀
You happy?
你喜欢吗
You look incredible.
你帅呆了
I was completely right.
我之前说得太对了
And the whole pedophile mustache was so distracting.
恋童癖胡子太让人分心了
But now I see your face.
现在我终于能好好看你的脸了
It's beautiful.
好看极了
Kind of like it, too.
我也很喜欢
It's like I was holding onto something,
好像我之前在紧抓着什么东西
like, some kind of mask.
像是某种面具
You know, we should hang out like in a date way.
我们应该去约会
Yeah, I'd love that.
好啊
I'm really glad that this all happened.
真高兴这一切发生了
Me too.
我也是
Ew, dude!
恶不恶心啊哥们儿
Homophobe! You hate the gays, man?
恐同你讨厌基佬吗
Who's a homophobe?
谁是恐同
No, look at this mess!
没人看看这团糟
I'm never gonna be able to get this back together.
我永远也不可能完璧归赵了
Lincoln, what do we all know
林肯众所周知
is the most challenging part of cooking?
做菜最难的部分是什么
Presentation. Exactly.
介绍没错
This is a presentation challenge.
这是介绍挑战
Let's turn our trash...
让我们把垃圾
into treasure.
变废为宝
I never will care about this basket, so good luck.
我永远也不会关心这个篮子祝你好运
I'm not losing this money.
我不要丢掉这笔钱
Cool hat. I love hats.
帽子不错我喜欢帽子
Cool, um...
酷
Can I ask you a personal question?
我能问你个私人问题吗
You ever taken a sharp turn in one of those trucks
你有没有过开着那些没有门的
without the doors on it, and then, you just fall out?
卡车急转弯然后你掉出去
All the time.
无时无刻
Quick follow-up.
还有个简单问题
Do you wanna make out right now?
你想现在亲热吗
Yeah. Okay.
想好
Perfect.
完美
Keep going.
继续
Do your thing.
做你的事
Just pick the right food.
选对的食物
Oh, great.
好极了
Everybody love cheese balls.
人人都爱芝士球
I know, they're, like, too good.
我知道它们太好吃了
This is actual food.
这是真的食物
This is honestly really fucking good.
老实说这个真的很好看
We did it.