剧集 | 大城小妞（2014） | 导航列表
Come on! Come on, dude!
快 快 姐们
It's coming, it's coming. Go, go, let's go, let's go!
来了 要来了 快 快
All right, we've gotta go to the back of the train. Okay.
Okay. Hey, sorry.
Ilana, come on.
Oh, my God.
Okay, come on, come on. All right, okay.
What's going on here?
Hold up, dude. We were supposed to be at the front end.
That's what I said. Is it?
Is it? Yeah. Mmhmm.
Are you sure? Yeah.
I thou-- I don't know,
I think you said we needed to be at--
I'm telling you,
fat dudes' dicks get sucked back inside their bodies.
I'm not saying you're wrong,
I just don't, like, understand the sucking back
into their bodies part of it.
It's not like it's science suction, Bill Nye!
I'm just saying,
the more room it has to present itself,
the bigger a penis appears.
Never forget this, okay?
Every 10 pounds a guy loses,
he gains a visual inch.
What, so it's like the best optical illusion of all time?
Like, um, Mount Rushmore,
how it looks, you know, like the presidents?
Well, Mount Rushmore is actually a sculpture.
Like, it was carved by an artist.
Dude, this heat is like killing me right now. I'm just dying.
Oh, I love it.
All my senses are heightened,
even my ethnic ambiguity.
I was catcalled today in what I believe is Creole.
Well, I'm on the edge of like swamp ass right now.
I need some A/C.
We're gonna have to throw these out.
Here we go.
This lighting is incredible.
Hey, do you have any tweezers?
Um, not on me, no.
Ilana, did I tell you that male Stacey's cooking me dinner tonight?
I mean, if I was a guy,
that is what I would do for a girl.
You should check out the Colin Farrell sex tape,
just to get back in the swing of things,
He is feasting on her like it is a dang milk shake.
It's me breakfast, lunch, and dinner right here.
'Twas 8:58 you said, sire?
But then you're gonna want to swab the decks
over to 9:44 for some master ass play.
And then round it out at 12:47 with some good old-fashioned fuck.
Oh. So sorry.
We love New York moms.
Um, I'm gonna buy these,
because they're now, like, sort of part of my body.
You said 8:58?
You're gonna like what you see.
I guarantee it.
Yeah, so then they got divorced,
but they're still really good friends.
Yeah? My parents too.
Divorced, still good friends.
So cool, right? So cool.
I hope to get married just to get divorced one day.
I've gotta be honest, I'm kind of massively
regretting my decision to sizzle fajitas
two inches from my head.
But I'm glad I wore my awesome new shirt.
It's like a smiley face.
It-- Kind of like a smiley face.
It is! Look at that.
My plan is working.
Get you over here, hide the A/C,
get those clothes off.
You don't actually have an air conditioner, do you?
No, I don't.
I'm gonna go. I think I'm gonna go wipe up--
I'm gonna go wipe my--
I'm gonna pee.
I'll pee and then you know what I'll do?
I'm gonna use the ladies' room.
Fuck, it's hot.
All right. Jesus, cool down. Just cool down, Abbi.
冷静 冷静 艾比
You're cool, you're cool.
You look good. You feel good.
Cool mode. Here we go.
I just peed. Yeah? I've just been cooking.
我刚撒了尿 是吗 我一直在做饭
I was thinking, maybe we forget about
the fajitas, um, for a sec.
I have a fan in my room.
Uh, that's where I sleep and do other stuff.
Animated movies are where it's at.
It's like visual crack.
Hey, my daughter loves "Frozen."
Watches it over and over... Oh, yes.
looped and loop-- She's frozen.
All Hollywood media is porn,
and all porn is kiddie porn.
We live in a rape culture, you know? We just do.
I'm gonna run to the little girl's room.
That is rape culture language right there.
Where'd you meet her, man?
At a Foot Locker in Times Square.
She was just hanging out.
She wasn't buying anything, she was just chilling.
I'm gonna take your pants off.
Okay? Okay. Okay. Okay.
剧集 | 大城小妞（2014） | 导航列表
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