美式主妇

American Housewife S01E19

Part 2 Dec. 10, 2019, 8:08 p.m.

你头上只会有这个
The only thing going on your head is this.
先生请你把卡车熄火好吗
Sir, could you please turn off your truck?
请你去死好吗
Could you please go screw yourself?
你正是我所需要的
You are just what I needed.
抱歉罗恩你没有义务去死
Sorry, Ron. You're under no obligation to go screw yourself.
大学时比利每个周日早上都会做早餐
In college, Billy would make us breakfast every Sunday morning.
我们当时是有多嗨啊[高]
How high were we?
我们在七楼所以相当高
We were on the seventh floor, so...pretty high.
转得太烂
Terrible save.
现在
Now...
这是我的鸡脖炒蛋
...this is my chicken neck scramble.
我的秘诀是把鸡脖子给烤了
My hook is, I barbecue the chicken necks.
大多数人会扔掉鸡脖子
You know, most people throw them away.
你的餐车
When was the last time
上次通过卫生检查是什么时候
your truck passed a health inspection test?
确切来说这是辆旧献血车
Well, technically, it's an old blood-donation truck,
不用检查
so I skate by inspection-free.
好了各位吃的拿前面来
Okay, people, pass your food to the front.
得手了
Ah-ah! Gotcha!
他把剃须膏挤在我的书包里
He put shaving cream in my backpack!
妈
Mom!
奥利弗爷们一点
Oliver, grow a pair.
我上幼儿园开始他就开始对我恶作剧
He's been pulling pranks on me since I was in kindergarten.
其实从你婴儿时期就开始了
Actually, it started when you were an infant.
是吗
It did?
他用记号♥笔给你画了小胡子
He drew a tiny mustache on you with a Sharpie.
你很像又肥又秃的希♥特♥勒♥
You looked just like a fat, bald Hitler.
这次报复他怎么样
What do you say this time, we get him back?
邪恶爸爸
Evil Dad.
这是我喜欢的父子情
Now, this is my kind of father/son bonding.
再见泰勒再见安娜凯特
Bye, Taylor. Bye, Anna-Kat.
凯蒂
Katie!
你收到我的电邮了吗
Did you get my e-mail?
你说的是40封里的哪一封
Which one of the 40 are you talking about?
我们终于让餐厅
We finally got the cafeteria
把玉米卷周二改成了豆腐周二
to change Taco Tuesday to Tofu Tuesday!
是不是好棒
Isn't that great?!
太棒了
Amazing!
就是啊
I know!
拜拜
Buh-bye!
拜拜
Bye!
什么情况
What the hell was that?
那些声音就像两只海豚交♥配♥一样
It was like listening to two dolphins banging.
太可怕了我甚至没注意到自己这样说话
Oh, it's terrible. I don't even notice I do it anymore.
四号♥套餐是谁
Who's this number 4 combo?
一个脖子两份胸肉一屁♥股♥的辣酱油
One neck, two breasts, and an ass full of Tabasco.
这是泰拉她是最差劲的
Oh, that's Tara. She's the worst of the bunch.
她是泰勒男友的妈妈
She's Taylor's boyfriend's mom.
泰拉这是我的朋友比利
Tara, this is my friend Billy.
你看到了吗
You see this?
A减
A-minus!
埃约这辈子没考过A以下的成绩
Eyo has never gotten below an "A" in his life.
这是你女儿的错
It's your daughter's fault.
她让他分心我不会允许
She's a distraction, and I won't have it.
我每天都要应付这样的屁话
This is the kind of nonsense I deal with every day.
你怎么还没把脑袋放进油炸锅里
I mean, how do you not stick your head in a deep fryer?
我没有油炸锅
I don't have a deep fryer.
这是我能给你的最诚实的答案
That is the most honest answer I could give you.
听我说
Listen to me.
埃约要读医学院
Eyo is going to medical school,
你的女儿不能妨碍他
and your girl's not going to get in his way.
别跟她说话
Stop talking to her!
记住你要成为麻醉师
Remember, you're going to be an anesthesiologist!
你看够了吗
Have you seen enough?
太够了
Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah.
想和我去吃第二顿早餐吗
Want to go to second breakfast with me?
是我的第三顿没问题
It'll be my third, but sure.
这是西港你最喜欢的地方吗
So, this is your favorite spot in town, huh?
对你觉得呢
Yeah. What do you think?
12块鸡蛋要12块
Twel-- Twelve dollars? For eggs?
我的鸡脖洋葱炒蛋才2块9毛9
I can get you a neck-and-onion scramble for $2.99.
所有东西都是没有农药的所以...
Well, everything's pesticide-free, so...
是啊真的很
Yeah, yeah, it's really...
干净
clean. ?
看桌子下面没有香口胶
Oh, look at that. There's not even any gum under the table.
现在有了
And there is now.
比利
Billy.
你什么时候变得这么做作
Hey, when did you become so hoity-toity?
我也是没办法
Well, my back's kind of up against the wall.
在西港没有太多选择
In Westport, there's not many choices.
你想离开这里
You want to get out of here
像以前那样吃早餐吗
and go have breakfast the way we used to?
当然想
Hell yeah.
没什么比得上加油站的食物对吗
Nothing better than gas-station grub, huh?
洋葱圈蘸玉米芝士
Onion rings dipped in nacho cheese
而且写的是"纸士"
spelled with a "Z" --
没什么比这更能让我快乐
nothing makes me happier.
我们要在马球赛上做点什么
So, what are we gonna do at this polo match?
把马放出去然后说
Let the horses out and then be like,
我不知道它们怎么跑掉的
"I don't know how they got out"?
不能这样做
We can't do that.
我还得住在这里比利
I still gotta live here, Billy.
现在不能喝啤酒
Can't drink a tall boy right now.
为什么
Why not?
放回袋子里
Just put them back in the bag.
我们等下再喝
We'll drink them later.
你担心有人看到你
Oh, are you worried that someone's gonna see you
早上9点半就在加油站喝醉吗
getting drunk at a gas station at 9:30 in the morning?
对差不多就是这样
Yeah. That covers all the bases.
你看什么
What are you looking at?
你变了
You've changed.
你疯了
You're crazy!
得了你在高级餐厅吃饭
Oh, come on! You're eating in fancy restaurants,
带我去参加马球赛
taking me to a polo match,
不喝啤酒
letting a tall boy go flat.
我一点也没变
Same girl I ever was.
好吧
Okay.
是的
I am!
证明
Prove it.
把那个偷了
Steal that.
那个烂东西吗
That stupid thing?
瞧
You see?
以前的凯蒂根本不会多想
Old Katie wouldn't think twice.
那个用花露水做果冻烈酒
What happened to the girl
干掉整个姐妹会的姑娘
who made jello shots out of toilet water
到哪里去了
and took out an entire sorority?
那次太爽了
Oh, that was the best!
对那姑娘去哪里了
Yeah, where's that girl?
她就在这里
She's right here.
这对孩子的教训是什么
What kind of lesson is this for the kids?!
比利说我不敢
Billy dared me.
我不喜欢她的朋友
I do not like these friends of hers.
你把这个拿回去你要道歉
You're gonna take this back, and you're going to apologize.
好
Fine.
但我没办法道歉
But I can't apologize.
我根本不知道这东西叫什么
I don't even know what this thing is called.
我要说什么 "抱歉我偷了你的..."
What am I supposed to say? "Sorry I stole your..."
我在练习把小马牵出场
I'm practicing leading the pony onto the field.
你先别说什么我知道
But before you say anything, I realize...
这是假的
this is make-believe.