美式主妇

American Housewife S01E19

Part 1 Dec. 10, 2019, 8:08 p.m.

你看起来和凯特王妃一模一样
Ooh! You look just like Kate Middleton.
我知道
I realize that.
但我还是不会戴这顶蠢帽子
But I'm still not wearing this dumb hat,
因为我不会去参加愚蠢的马球赛
because I'm not going to the stupid polo match.
这是我为社区举办的慈善活动
This is my charity event for the community,
你是社区的一分子你得去
and you are part of that community, and you are going.
不我不是社区的一分子
Mnh-mnh. I'm not part of the community.
我只是恰好住在这个社区
I just happen to live in the community.
什么慈善活动多瑞丝
What's the charity, Doris?
我不知道
I don't know.
马孤儿爱♥滋♥
Horses? Orphans? AIDS?
老天希望不是什么闷死人的事比如说环保
God, I hope it's not for something boring, like the environment.
我们应该去亲爱的会很有意思的
We should go, honey. It'd be fun.
格雷格拜托别逼我抛弃你
Greg, please. Don't make me leave you.
我没动机减肥整个复仇身材出来
I'm too unmotivated to get a revenge body.
多瑞丝我不喜欢高档的活动
Doris, I just don't like fancy events.
我不是这样的人
It's not who I am.
我喜欢舒适
I like to be comfortable.
你在外面玩马时
So while you're out playing horsies,
我会在家盖着毯子
I'll be at home, covered in a blanket.
没错可能还有爆米花
And yes -- probably popcorn.
奥利弗会去
Oliver's going.
多瑞丝让我在马球赛上剪彩
Doris offered to let me cut the ceremonial ribbon at the polo match.
为什么
Why?!
你恨他
You hate him.
对非常恨
I do. So much.
但我是为了惩罚我的孩子
But I did it to punish my kids.
他们摔碎了太多手♥机♥屏
They've cracked so many smartphones.
别再说不是你的错是你的错
Stop saying it wasn't your fault! It was!
所以我剥夺了剪彩殊荣
So I took away the ribbon-cutting honor
给了奥利弗
and gave it to Oliver.
我的照片会刊登在《西港观察者》的
I'll get my picture in the "About Town" section
镇新闻区
of the Westport Observer.
大人物都在上面
Anybody who's anybody is in there.
这个看起来怎么样
How does this look?
我怀他时
I ate some street food in Manhattan
在曼哈顿吃过街边小摊
when I was pregnant with him.
不知道肉虫子
I wonder if one of those meat worms
是不是钻到他脑袋里了
made its way into his brain.
你要参加马球赛
You're going to that polo match.
如果我戴上这顶帽子去参加这个活动
If I put on this hat and go to this thing,
我就和这里无法忍♥受的一切融为了一体
I become everything I can't stand about this town.
突然间我就成了
Suddenly, I'm one of those people
吃完沙拉就说自己饱了的人
who say they're stuffed after eating salad.
老天我讨厌...
God, I hate --
喂在想干什么呢
Hey! What's going on in there?!
我不会去你不能逼我
I'm not going, and you can't make me.
安娜凯特
Hey, Anna-Kat.
你想在小马盛会上牵马出来吗
You want to lead a horsie out at a pony event?
棒
Yes!
你输了
Got you now.
被死党摆了一道
Blindsided by my best friend.
现在我知道罗伊被老虎咬时的感受了
Now I know how Roy felt when the tiger ate him.
著名驯虎师 03年表演中被老虎咬伤
美式主妇第一季第十九集
我戴紫色领结奥利弗是紫色背带
I'll wear this purple tie, give Oliver the suspenders,
女儿们穿紫色裙子
we'll put the girls in purple dresses,
给你带点紫色我们全家就是一个系列了
and we'll figure something out for you so we all match.
你在哪里弄的紫色领结
Where the hell did you get a purple bow tie?
我成为清唱合唱团里的替补三号♥时
When I was alternate number 3 in my Duke a cappella group.
别
?Don't.
你知道我听你唱歌♥时无法控制我的表情
You know I can't control my face when I listen to you sing.
你又在看我跳舞的视频吗
Are you watching that video of me dancing again?
你让我喝了两杯玛格丽塔放惠特尼·休斯顿的歌♥
You gave me two margaritas and put on Whitney Houston.
可以说是圈套
It was basically entrapment.
不
No!
我在说服比利参加马球赛
I am trying to convince Billy to come to the polo match.
我不希望你的大学室友来
I don't want your old college roommate here.
他像是男人和婴儿的综合体
He's like a man mixed with an infant.
他是婴男
He's a "Minfant."
别评判比利
Don't judge Billy.
记住如果不是他
Remember, if he hadn't taken me in
在我因小过被踢过校园时收留我
when I got kicked off campus for a minor infraction --
-你裸奔 -不
- You were streaking. - ?No.
我是裸着坐在喷泉里喝着汽酒
I was sitting naked in the fountain, drinking sangria.
裸奔还得跑
"Streaking" implies running.
你是对我真傻
You're right. I feel silly.
如果比利没有租我一间房♥
And if Billy hadn't rented me a room,
我可能就退学了回家了
I might have dropped out, moved home,
不会报你的课不会认识你
never signed up for your class, never met you,
我们的孩子也不会出生
and our children would've never been born.
你讨厌比利就是讨厌我们的孩子
So by you hating Billy, you hate our children.
孩子们你们爸讨厌你们
Kids! Your dad hates you!
-什么 -没什么
- What?! - ?Nothing!
比利是我和过去的我的联♥系♥
Billy is my connection to who I was.
如果我要参加那个愚蠢的马球赛
And if I have to go to that stupid polo match
待在我不喜欢的那些人旁边
and be around those people that I don't like,
我需要他在那里支持我
I need him there to lean on.
他嗓门大粗鲁
He's loud, crass,
需要我提醒你他在我们婚礼上做了什么吗
and need I remind you what he did at our wedding?
蛋糕跳水
Cake dive!
他毁了我们的婚礼
He ruined our wedding.
比利来
Billy's in.
我们家里没地方给他住
Well, we have no room for him here.
他把餐车停在车道上住在车上
He'll park his food truck in the driveway and stay in that.
很好
Great.
我们不如把沙发搬到前门草坪上
Why don't we just pull the couch onto the front lawn
弄个完整的白人垃圾场景
to complete the white-trash tableau.
就凭这话我要看你跳舞的视频
Just for that, I'm gonna watch that video of you dancing.
真不敢相信比利会来
I can't believe Billy's coming to visit.
要见他你应该激动才对他是你的教父
You should be excited to see him. He's your godfather.
他做的事就是吓我
All he does is terrorize me.
我们打了七年的恶作剧战争
We've been in a seven-year prank war,
只有他实施恶作剧
and he's the only one doing the pranks.
我最开心的一天就是看到
I will never be happier than the day
你的眉毛被剃了
I saw you with shaved eyebrows.
他到了
He's here!
给我让开
Out of my way!
为什么你见到我时从没这么激动
How come you're never that excited to see me?
太多理由现在说不完
Too many reasons to name right now!
快格雷格
Come on, Greg!
比利
Billy!
嘿草...
Hey! Breath!
真好
Lovely.
你好吗老大
How you doing, chief?
老大很好谢谢
Chief is well. Thank you.
-我叫格雷格 -好的
- And it's "Greg." - ?Ah. Okay.
他从不记得我的名字
He never remembers my name.
那又怎样他叫我♥草♥...
So? He calls me Breath.
你有什么好生气的
What are you upset about?
跟你的教父问好
Say hello to your godfather.
奥利弗有天我会让你帮忙
Oliver, someday I'm gonna come to you for a favor.
好的我想这玩笑已经过时了
Okay, yeah. I think this joke has run its course.
你还记得泰勒和安娜凯特吧
You remember Taylor and Anna-Kat.
泰勒好久不见
Yeah. Taylor, it's been a long time.
我知道你喜欢保持双手干净
And I know that you like to keep your hands clean,
所以我送你一盒塑料手套
so I got you a box of plastic gloves.
午餐大婶就戴这个
Ooh! The lunch lady wears these.
好在有你来救我
Oh, thank God you're here to save me.
他们想把我变成高档帽子女士
They're trying to turn me into a fancy-hat person.
别担心有我比利在
Oh, don't worry about that. Billy's got ya.