辛普森一家
The Simpsons S27E11
Part 3
Dec. 8, 2020, 12:16 p.m.
A or B?
第一种 还是第二种
A... or B?
第一种还是第二种
A or B?
第一种 还是第二种
A... or B?
- 第二种 -第一种 -弃权
- B. - A. - N.
巴特长了胡子之后
Ugh! I'm tired of my son
像个小白脸一样 我真感到心烦
having a mustache like a pool boy.
那些小白脸赚很多钱呢
Hey, those pool boys pull in some sweet jingle.
而且他们还能穿人字拖去上班
Plus, they get to work in flip-flops.
霍霍 是时候查明原因了
Homie, it's time we figured this out.
也许牛奶会帮我们思考
Maybe milk will help us think.
牛奶能怎么帮你思考呢
How would milk do that?
牛奶是那些避免自己
It's from cows who are smart enough
成为汉堡的聪明牛生产的
not to get turned into hamburger.
我从没阅读过牛奶盒上的标识
Oh. I never looked closely at this milk before.
这是汽水公♥司♥生产的吗
Is it made by a soda company?
他们不只生产汽水 玛姬
They don't just make soda, Marge.
他们还生产工业泡沫
They also make industrial foam.
霍默 是牛奶的问题
Homer, it's the milk!
我去打包装盒上的热♥线♥电♥话♥
I'll call the help hotline on the carton.
有什么事
Talk to me.
我要退牛奶
Yes, I need a milk refund.
好的 请问你的地址是
Right. Um, address, please?
等一下
Wait, wait. Hold on.
无绿街 七百四十二号♥ 是常绿梯田街
742 Nevergreen... Oh, Evergreen Terrace.
抱歉 我们的系统有点慢
Sorry. Our system's a little slow.
真恶心 我是说 真酷啊
Ew! I mean, cool!
这个拐角的风景真靓啊 巴特
I just turned a big corner, Bart.
辛普森
Oh, Simpson,
我就想让你看看 我幸灾乐祸的样子
I called you here to gloat.
行了 我知道你和贝雷拉在一起了
Yeah, yeah, I know about you and Berrera.
你知道我和卡罗尔在一起了吗
You know about me and Carol?
你竟然知道她的名字
You know her name?
她的中名我也知道 我还知道很多事呢
Oh, first and middle, and I know more.
她最喜欢沙拉里面的碎芝士
Her favorite salad bar item is little shredded cheese.
每个人都喜欢碎芝士
Pff. Everyone likes that.
我知道的可不止这些
Oh, I know a lot more than that.
她从来没看过"老友记"
She's never seen an episode of Friends.
"一个与"什么的那集呢
Not even "The One with..."?
"老友记"每一集的名字都是用"The One With..."开头
她全都没看过
No, not one.
她有一只猫 两只眼睛的颜色不同
And she has a cat with different color eyes.
猫的名字叫鲍伊
His name is Bowie.
不
No!
面对现实吧 辛普森 你斗不过我的
Face it, Simpson: You can't compete with me.
我可以租车带她出去玩
I can rent a car.
我怎样才能破坏他的幸福
How can I derail his happiness?
我来送活动课用的动物
I got a delivery of live class pets here.
有趣 打扰一下 我有个问题想请教
Interesting. Excuse me. I have one question.
说吧
Yes.
你洗澡的时候 你会用洗发水洗胡子吗
When you're in the shower, do you shampoo your mustache?
当然 这是必"须"的
Of course. It's a must-stache,
不是你想洗就洗"须"
not an if-you-feel-like-it-stache.
好了 祝你今天愉快
All right, have a good day.
我给你带了些糖果 卡罗尔
I brought you some candy, Carol.
不是便利店买♥♥的 也不是沃尔格林药房♥买♥♥的
Not from CVS, not from Walgreens.
我是在机场买♥♥的
From the airport.
而且我当时没打算坐飞机
And I wasn't even going anywhere.
你的糖果盒里全是卓帕卡布拉
Your candy's filled with chupacabras.
美洲加勒比海出没的谜之吸血生物
我们被捉弄了 或者就是被骗了
We've been pranked or possibly punked.
我知道是谁捉弄了你
I know who your prankster is.
是辛普森小子
The Simpson lad.
你刚才在看我们亲热吗
Were you watching us make out?
我是在看你试图亲热
I was watching you try.
妈妈 你能不能 请你
Mom, could you please, please, please
沿着唇线化啊
stay within the lip liner?
一周前 你从来不化妆
A week ago, you'd never even worn makeup.
现在 你和艾斯·弗莱利一样专业
Now you're an expert like Ace Frehley.
美国音乐人 作曲家及歌♥唱家
雪莉 特丽
Sherri. Terri.
通常派对开始的前一小时 双胞胎才会到场
I usually don't see double until an hour into the party.
要下雨了
It's going to rain,
雨会把妆弄花
and rain washes off makeup,
然后他们就会看到我本来的面目
and then they will see me as I truly am...
一个不完美 有瑕疵
imperfect, blemished,
还穿着蓬蓬裙的社交笨蛋
a social mess in a lampshade dress.
好吧
Okay, all right.
丽莎 你本来就不受欢迎
Lisa, you were never popular,
所以你就放手一搏吧
so you're playing with the house's money.
大家 注意了
Attention, party!
我和你们不一样
I'm not like you.
我是说 我圣诞节的开销 都捐给了公告广播电台
What I'm saying is, I gave my Christmas money to NPR.
我还会使用化学仪器
I have a chemistry set... that I've used!
你说这话有什么意义
Is there a point to this?
在这个妆容之下
And beneath all this makeup,
我的皮肤有问题
I have... problem skin.
你在说什么
What are you talking about?
你皮肤挺好的
Your skin is fine.
真的吗 坏牛奶的效果消失了
Really? The bad milk wore off.
所以 承认自己不完美也许是
So, uh, admitting you're not cool is probably
你能做最酷的事了 对吗
the coolest thing you can do, right?
我看我还是走吧
I will see myself out.
你看起来很孤单呀
You look ba-lonely.
我感到孤独
I feel ba-lonely.
- 你想和我做朋友吗 - 好呀
- You want to be friends? - I do.
你那只手干净吗
Um, how clean is that hand?
现在干净多了
Cleaner now.
好吧
Okay.
一只鱼说 "哞"
A fish says, "Moo!"
但愿这样不会太久
This isn't gonna last long.
我还在水盆里泡澡哦
I still take baths in the sink.
行了 我们绝交吧 抱歉 拉尔夫
Okay, it's over. Sorry, Ralph.
为此我要吃一根蜡笔
I'll be eating crayons for one.
我的计划很完美
Oh, the plan is perfect!
我只需要在塞爆竹的时候
I just have to get Skinner to hold still
让斯金纳坐着别动
while I slip a firecracker in his butt.
拜托 放弃吧
Come on, give it up.
巴特 我知道发生什么事了
Bart, I realized what's been going on.
我们正在被荷尔蒙影响
We've been operating under the influence of hormones.
被荷尔蒙影响 这听起来很牵强啊
Hormones? Sounds far-fetched.
这根本完全不相干
Very far-fetched.
这是真的 所以 给斯金纳一个机会吧
Well, it's true, so give Skinner a shot.
每个人都有快乐的权利
Everyone deserves happiness.
即使孬种也一样
Even wieners.
爸 你会付多少钱 买♥♥这个胡子小精灵
Hey, Dad, how much does the Mustache Fairy pay?
胡子小精灵 指长胡子的人喝醉酒后 做事留下的证据
三美金
Hmm, three bucks.
你邀请我滑冰的时候 我以为你会滑冰
When you asked me to go skating, I really thought you knew how.
我以为可以通过看YouTubes视频学会滑冰
Uh, I thought I could learn by watching YouTubes this morning.
好吧 辛普森 我在这里
All right, Simpson, I'm here.
尽情嘲笑我吧 你这个差劲的男孩
Do what you do best... your worst.
听着 西摩 我不准备做任何事
Look, Seymour, I'm not gonna do a thing.
卡罗尔 他归你了
Carol, he's all yours.
我的第一场胜战
Wow. The first war I've won.
卡罗尔 接下来 我想让你见我的母亲
Uh, Carol, all that's left is for you to meet my mother,
她滑过来了
and, uh, up she skates now.
儿子 我想说 祝你们四位愉快
My son, I just want to say, I wish the four of you the best.
哪里来的四位
Four of us?
你 她 你的飞机模型和小黄书
You, her, your model planes and nudie books.
抱歉 西摩
Sorry, Seymour.
现在我看着你 就不由自主想到那个画面
Now I can't look at you without picturing it.
我的房♥间没那么糟
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