家有喜旺（2010）

Raising Hope S04E16

Part 4 Nov. 24, 2020, 1:06 p.m.

And this was your audition.
这是你的试镜考核
It's new.
全新的哦
It's called So You Think You Can Babysit.
名字就叫做《保姆天下》
I'm so glad to hear
我很高兴听到
you guys aren't really a cashier and bagger.
你们不只是收银员和装袋员
That sounded like such a sad life.
那种生活听上去实在太可悲了
We got busted by a 17-year-old
我们被一个17岁的小姑娘打击得要死
who's already cooler than we ever were.
她现在比我们之前要酷多了
Yeah, we felt really lame, so we did the same thing
是啊我们觉得很挫所以我们做了
every cool kid in Natesville has always done--
纳什维尔的每个酷小孩都会做的事
climb the antenna.
爬天线塔
Natesville really ought to invest in a water park.
纳什维尔真该投资兴修一下水上公园了
Or at least some kind of rec room with a dart board.
至少也该建个娱乐休闲室里面设有飞镖盘
What are you two doing?
你们两个在干什么呢
Stop talking and get down right now!
别说话了立刻给我下来
You're parents now.
你们已经为人父母了
You can't be unresponsible.
你们不能这么不负责
If you fall, it's not like in the cartoons.
如果摔下去后果可不是动画片里那么简单
I mean, sure you might flatten out
我是说你当然可能会摔成肉饼
or make a hole in the shape of your bodies,
或在地上砸出一个人形大洞
but you're not gonna survive it.
但你是不可能活下去的
Oh, my God.
我的天啊
Scaredy-pants Chance.
胆小鬼吉斯
Virginia, please don't mock me
维吉妮亚别在这时候嘲笑我
when I'm trying to be serious with our son and his wife!
我正想严肃教育我儿子和他媳妇呢
No. You weren't scared of breaking your neck at all.
不其实你当时根本不是害怕摔断脖子
You were scared about who would take care of us if you did.
你是害怕如果你死了谁来照顾我们母子
For the first time in your life,
那是你人生中第一次
you were making an adult, responsible decision.
做出了理智负责任的决定
Maybe that's why it felt so weird.
或许那正是我感觉很怪的原因
I also just realized you never should have thrown out
我刚刚才意识到你不该扔掉你那
your super-cool puka shell necklace.
超级酷的普卡珠贝项链
But either way,
但不管怎样
you're still the bravest, sexiest man I've ever met.
你都是我见过的最勇敢最性感的男人
This is really sweet.
真的好有爱哦
What are you still doing here?!
你们还在这上面干什么
You have a daughter to take care of!
你们还有个女儿要照顾呢
Dad's right. We should go.
老爸说得对我们该下去了
Love you guys!
爱你们哦
Bye.
再见
That's right.
这才对嘛
Run home to your baby, Scaredy-pants Chance!
回家带孩子去吧胆小鬼吉斯
It is actually a pretty funny nickname.
那其实是个很搞笑的外号♥呢
We did it! We're at the top!
我们做到了我们爬到顶了
Screw you, Cindy Holbrook!
去你♥妈♥的♥ 辛迪·霍布鲁克
You know what?
你知道吗
If I'm being honest,
如果让我说实话的话
this isn't really making me feel a whole lot cooler.
这并没有让我觉得比之前酷了很多
Yeah, me, neither.
是啊我也没觉得
Maybe we're not gonna be cool anymore.
或许我们再也没法成为很酷的人了
Maybe, from now on, we just get lamer and lamer.
或许从现在开始我们只会变得越来越挫
Then we die of lameness.
直到挫死
Yeah, maybe so.
是啊或许真会这样
Promise me you'll grow lame with me?
答应我你要跟我一路挫到老
I think I'll be able to handle it better
如果我们一起经历的话
if we go through it together.
我会觉得容易接受一些
Me, too.
我也这么觉得
Let's grow old gracefully like Cher or Carrot Top.
让我们像林青霞和周润发一样优雅地老去吧
Does that mean you're not going to do any more dares?
那意味着你不会再接受大冒险挑战了吗
Oh, I think I'm over that.
我觉得我已经放下那个执念了
Maybe just one last one?
不如再来玩最后一次吧
I dare you to kiss me.
我打赌你一定不敢吻我
Yeah, we did it!
我们做到了
We kissed on top of the tower!
我们在天线塔的顶部接吻了
We're not lame!
我们一点都不挫
We're just like all the other cool people in this town.
我们和镇上其他的酷人一样
Incredibly stupid.
蠢得要死
I wish someone could have seen us up here. I know.
我真希望有人可以看到我们在这上面我懂的
I bet we're the oldest people to do this.
在所有爬上塔顶的人中我们肯定是最老的
What? Freeze! This is the police!
搞毛不许动我们是警♥察♥
You are trespassing on government property.
你们非法侵入政♥府♥设施
Yes!
太棒了
Everybody's gonna hear about this!
所有人都会听到这些话
Dear diary, I don't care what Virginia says.
亲爱的日记我不在乎维吉妮亚怎么说
Hubert is the cat's pajamas.
休伯特就是我的真命天子
I think tonight's the night I'll finally lose it.
我觉得今晚就是我的失身之夜了
My eyesight.
我的视力好差
Can't even see what I'm writing.
我都看不清自己在写些什么了
Hubert!
休伯特
Hi, Barbara June.
嗨芭芭拉·琼
Okay, you got five minutes to get your stuff together,
听着给你5分钟时间收拾东西
and we're leaving here forever.
我们要永远离开这里了
Did we make a suicide pact?
我们是约定好了要双双殉情吗
Because I did make one with a pen pal once,
因为我有次确实跟一个笔友约定好了
and it didn't turn out too well.
结果可不怎么好
No, we're gonna hop on my pimped out Get Around
不我们要骑上我那拉风的老年车
and we're gonna hit the open sidewalk.
潇洒地在人行道上驰骋
Well, I don't know if I can just pick up and leave.
我不确定能不能就这样收拾东西走人
I have a family, I have a house.
我有家庭有房♥子x7f
I met a new guy named Hubert.
我新认识了一个叫休伯特的男人
Come on, Barbara June.
别这样芭芭拉·琼
I want to feel the breeze rushing through
我想感受到微风穿过
what's left of my hair, and I want you by my side.
我那所剩不多的头发我希望你在我身边
I really want to go with you. I'm just scared.
我真的很想跟你一起走但我很害怕
Relax, mamacita. Here, take a Quaalude.
放松亲爱的来吃一片安♥眠♥酮♥吧
Oh, wait. That's a stool softener.
等等这是大便软化药
I better take that.
我来吃了吧
Here you go.
给
Are you nuts? This stuff could kill us.
你疯了吗这东西可能会害死我们的
So what if it does?
就算真死了又怎么样
At least we'll die with smiles on our faces,
至少我们会面带着笑容死去
and a little bit of vomit
或许嘴边会沾上一点呕吐物
'cause sometimes those Quaaludes will make you choke on your tongue.
因为有时候安♥眠♥酮♥会让你恶心反胃
My family's very important to me,
我的家人对我来说很重要
and-and they're good, responsible people.
他们都是善良负责的人
Hey, Maw Maw.
嘿曾奶奶
Remember Officer Steve and Officer Mark?
你还记得史蒂夫和马克警官吗
Oh, no. What did you two idiots do now?
不好你们两个蠢货又犯了什么事
You'll read about it in tomorrow's newspaper.
你会在明天的报纸上看到的
And only in the newspaper.
只有报纸哦
Apparently, we kicked some wires
显然我们弄断了一些电缆线
and knocked out all the local TV stations.
导致本地几个电视台陷入瘫痪
Hello, Officers.
你们好啊警官们
I'm ex-congressman Hubert Wilson,
我是前议员休伯特·威尔逊
and I think we can all agree
我觉得我们都同意
that it would be better if I were left out of this.
如果这件事可以不牵连到我那就再好不过了
I'm not angry. I'm just disappointed.
我不生气我只是失望
It's fun being in trouble.
惹麻烦了倒还挺好玩的
Makes me feel like a teenager again. Me, too.
让我感觉又回到了青少年时期同感
Please don't take away our phone privileges.
求你不要没收我们的手♥机♥
I'm taking away your phone privileges!
我当然要没收你们的手♥机♥了
As long as you don't ground us.
只要你不把我们禁足就行
You're grounded! Go to your room!
你们被禁足了回房♥间去
Thank you for caring so much.
谢谢你如此关心我们
What's this? Guess I forgot to take my vitamin.
这是什么我好像忘了吃维生素药片