木兰尼的人生（2014）

Mulaney S01E10

Part 4 April 13, 2021, 10:52 a.m.

我以为可以开我老板的玩笑
I thought I could make fun of my boss because,
因为他地位更高可是却适得其反
you know, he's higher status, but it totally backfired.
我知道你的意思
I know exactly what you mean.
就好像我以为自己是馅饼
It's like when I thought I was the knish
而霍利斯·里普维茨是面包球一样
and Horace Lipowitz was the matzo ball.
现在我又成面包球了吗
So now I'm a matzo ball?
好极了
Great.
约翰事情很简单
John, it's very simple.
你只需要让力量重新平衡
You just need to reset the balance of power.
你需要用行动告诉你老板
You need to make a gesture to your boss
你知道自己的位置
to show him that you know your place.
谢谢奥斯卡
Thanks, Oscar.
这是个好主意
That's a good idea.
天哪五十年代时的生活真是好啊
Man, life was so much better in the '50s.
不不是的
No, it wasn't.
你在这里干什么
What are you doing here?
我还以为这里住的是算命先生呢
I thought this was the address for the rub and tug psychic.
我最不想见的人就是你了
You're the last person I want to see.
我让堂娜骗你说
Look, I had Donna lie to you
这里住的是算命先生
and tell you that this was the rub and tug psychic
因为我需要见你
because I needed you to show up.
卢我想告诉你我知道自己的地位
Lou, I want to show you that I know my place,
我真的很敬仰你
and I really look up to you.
你看我还给你准备了礼物
In fact, I got you this gift.
等等等等
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait, wait, wait, wait.
你住这里吗
You live here?
是啊
Yeah.
但这里是个地下室啊
But this is the basement, right?
不是放垃圾的地方吗
Where you store all your trash?
是吧可这里是我们的客厅
Kind of, except it's our living room,
我们还刚打扫了呢
and we just had it cleaned.
天哪你这么穷啊
Oh, my God, you're poor.
别这么说也没那么穷吧
Oh, come on. It's not that bad.
不不不不不
Oh, no, no, no. No, no, no.
你说得对没事
You're right. It's fine.
我是说...反正你年轻嘛
I mean, it's-- you're young and hungry.
反正你才19岁呢老天
You know, you're 19 years old, for God's sake.
其实我29岁了
Well, I'm, you know, 29.
什么
What?
你都29岁了吗
You're 29?
那你还住在这里
And you live here?
跟两个人合租
With two roommates?
这里就跟下水道一样
Look at this sewer.
你住得就跟忍♥者神龟一样
You live like a Ninja Turtle.
而你就只会为我写段子
And all you've ever done is write for me.
肯尼迪32岁的时候
I mean, when Bobby Kennedy was 32,
都当上美国司法部部长了呢
he was Attorney General of the United States.
等你32岁时说不定连咖啡机都买♥♥不起
When you're 32, you won't even own an espresso.
行了行了
Okay, okay, okay.
行了看来你已经重拾信心了
Okay, sounds like you've regained your higher status.
天哪当然
Oh, my God, yes.
现在你知道你不该生我的气了吧卢
You see why you shouldn't be offended by me, Lou?
要是生你这种人的气那我就是个傻♥逼♥了
Oh, I'd be a fool to be offended by someone like you.
苍天呐
Oh, my goodness.
-我现在好多了 -那就好
- I feel good. - Well, good.
但是我为了向你道歉
But just as a token of my apology,
给你准备了份礼物
I got you this gift.
里面什么都没有
There's nothing in it.
怎么难道你还想让我送你旅行支票吗
What, you were expecting traveler's checks?
下次记得提醒我教你到底该怎么讲这个段子
Oh, remind me later to tell you how to do that line.
那你就带我参观一下吧
So...give me the tour.
-我不想带你参观 -来嘛
- No, I don't want to. - Oh, come on.
好吧
All right.
这是我们的厨房♥...
This is our kitchen, where we--
你竟然能称之为厨房♥...
The fact that you even call it a kitchen...
简·梦露约会指南
倾听
优雅地打喷嚏
唱鸡尾酒歌♥
打扫
欣赏他的兴趣爱好
一个地区的抗争
约会怎么样
How was the date?
我拉了一裤子呦
I crapped my tights.
天哪
Oh, dear.
好吧
Oh, right.
有时候吃学习神药是会拉肚子
You know, sometimes study pills can give you diarrhea.
你怎么不早跟我说约翰
Oh, well, it would have been nice to know that, John.
我光是学会怎么用那些叉子就用了整整一周
I just spent the last week memorizing what fork to use.
终于到约会了可是我却
Come date night, and I'm sneaking out
在屁♥股♥上包着沙滩浴巾
of the movie theater with a beach towel
偷溜出了电影院
tied around my ass.
我讨厌这种谈话
Yo, I hate this conversation.
这样太不淑女了
It isn't very ladylike.
你知道吗奥斯卡
You know what, Oscar?
我不用改变自己
I don't need to change who I am
来让别人喜欢我
to get a guy to like me.
如果对方不喜欢我说
And if you don't like me making a joke
我有男性生殖器这么好笑的笑话
that I have male genitals, which is hilarious,
那或许我们从一开始就不该约会
then maybe we shouldn't date in the first place.
听我说人的一生中
Look, there'll be a point in your life
是有时候可以粗鲁可以拉一裤子的
when you can be rude and crap your tights.
那是在人70岁的时候
It's called being 70.
所以现在你为什么就不能努力一下呢
So right now, why don't you just try a little?
你们都是
All of you.
谢谢奥斯卡
Thanks, Oscar.
不客气
You're welcome.
这简直是天大的荣幸
My pleasure to be welcomed.
下面继续播出凌晨两点的法式吐司秀
Back to our 2:00 A.M. showing of French Toast.
法式吐司秀
这位先生的菜蜗牛[法语]
And for the monsieur, escargot.
好好吃啊这吃的是什么
Yummy. What's that mean?
就是蜗牛
It means "Snails."
我错过了什么吗
What did I miss?
什么都错过了
Everything.
那个女的为什么露着胸啊
Why is that lady topless?
就是她偷了...
She's the one that stole the--
算了没事
You know what, it doesn't make sense.
继续睡你的吧
Go back to sleep.
法式土司秀
第五次
小心点先生
Careful, monsieur.
介个盘纸很烫的
Zis plate is very hot.
我试试才知道
Uh, I'll be the judge of that.
我为什么没有点...
Why didn't I order...
法式土司呢
French toast?
法式土司秀
第六次
小心点先生
Careful, monsieur.
介个盘纸很烫的
Zis plate is very hot.
我试试才知道
Oh, I'll be the judge of that.
我需要一些...
I need some...
法式土司
French toast.
慕兰尼的人生
第一季第十集