木兰尼的人生（2014）

Mulaney S01E07

Part 4 April 13, 2021, 10:51 a.m.

装了摄像头想偷♥窥♥简去卫生间
a video camera so he could watch Jane go to the bathroom.
算他倒霉我从不去卫生间
Yeah, jokes on him. I don't go to the bathroom.
莫迪福我们绝对不会赶你走的
Motif, we would never kick you out.
其实奥斯卡今晚要召集大家开住户会议
In fact, Oscar has a building meeting tonight
我们要把你的名字加到租约上
and we're gonna add you to the lease.
真的吗
For real?
真的因为我们需要你
Yes, we need you.
我的自信心已经降到最低点了
My confidence is at an all-time low.
为什么
Why?
你一上麦克简直就是耶稣在世好吗
You rock the mic like baby Jesus.
我也需要你
I need you too.
约翰说我长得像克里斯汀·阿曼普
John said I look like Christiane Amanpour.
回去吧莫迪福
Go to them, Motif.
你们应该在一起
You belong together.
女士们你们真是我的天使
Ladies, you've been my angels.
你们一直借给我肩膀让我哭泣
You have been my shoulder to cry on,
毕竟我们是三周前在那场沐浴露广♥告♥上才认识的
ever since we met on that body wash commercial three weeks ago.
我们以后应该不会再见面了
I don't think I'll ever see you again.
阿尼等等
Arnie, wait!
不要去演《傲骨贤妻》我需要你
Don't do the Good Wife, I need you,
你个脱线先生死胖子
you fat Mr. Magoo on crack.
这可是个重要角色卢
It's a huge role, Lou.
我要演一个见谁跟谁滚床单的律师
I play a lawyer who has sex with everybody.
但是你愿意走进一个假屋子里
Yes, but do you want to walk into fake rooms
假装自己是个律师吗
and pretend to be a lawyer.
你可不是那种人
It's not you.
快回来做我的托儿吧
Come back and be my audience plant.
我会跟你签合同给你发福利
I'll give you a contract and benefits.
你家人来拜访的时候我只侮辱你不侮辱他们了
And when your family visits, I'll just insult you.
抱歉打扰一下我说阿尼
Hey, sorry to interrupt, but Arnie,
你真的应该去演《傲骨贤妻》
you just 100% do the Good Wife.
不我不是个律师
No, I'm not a lawyer.
那样是自欺欺人卢我要回家
It'd be a lie. Lou, I'm coming home.
好吧随你
All right, whatever.
谢谢你雷根博根太太
Thank you, Mrs. Regenbogen.
不幸的是你那和"盖世太保式"一般高的
Unfortunately, there's no way to change
天花板根本没法儿更换
the "Gestapo-like" height of your ceilings.
下一项洗衣房♥
Next order of business, the laundry room.
塔克曼太太
Mrs. Tuchman.
洗衣房♥里全是纳粹老鼠屎
The laundry room is full of nazi mouse droppings.
大家好
Oh, hello.
你们好
Oh, hello.
我们有事要议
We have an order of business.
太好了大家把手中难喝到死的咖啡放下认真听
Delightful! Everyone, put down your awful coffee and listen.
我的室友简和我这周意识到一件事
My roommate Jane and I realized something this week.
我们讨厌彼此
We hate each other.
我们也不是讨厌彼此但是我们需要第三名室友
Well, we don't hate each other, but we need a third roommate
来阻止我们谋杀对方
to keep us from killing each other.
就像盖世太保对很多人做的那样
Like the Gestapo did to many.
她知道
She knows.
所以我们402的住户
And that's why, we, the residents of 402,
想申请把我们的好朋友莫迪福加到租约上
would like permission to add our good friend Motif to the lease.
法♥西♥斯♥主义者
Fascist.
约翰你这番演讲不错
John, that was a lovely speech.
但你们的动议被否决了
Motion denied.
你们的租约上不能有三个人
We can't put three people on your lease.
法律上讲你们的公♥寓♥就是个小一居室
Legally, your apartment is a junior one-bedroom
可以装个大点的冰箱
with a walk-in ice box.
你们租约上有两个人已经是上限了
Even two names is pushing it.
好吧奥斯卡我们就跟你玩儿到底
Okay, herr Oscar, we'll play your game.
不把莫迪福加到租约上那我们也拒绝在上面
If Motif isn't on the lease, then we're not on the lease!
对吧简
Right, Jane?
不我不同意约翰的观点
No! I don't agree with John at all.
我要在租约上
I wanna be on the lease.
动议通过约翰从租约上除名
Motion approved! John's off the lease.
租约转移给简·帕尔瓦娜
The lease is transferred to Jane Parvaneh
还有不知道姓什么的莫迪福叫他进来
Motif no-last-name. Send him in!
谢谢
Thank you!
太棒了太棒了
Yes! Yeah baby!
哎呦我去简你这小连帽衫是哪儿买♥♥的啊
Damn, Jane, where did you get this hoodie?
别人送的
A hamper.
你是说真的吗
Are you for real right now?
你穿着这个可就像波斯的凯蒂·佩里啊
'Cause you look like a Persian Katy Perry.
各位各位请让这个非本楼住户出去
Boys, boys, please show this non-tenant out.
别这样好吗奥斯卡我吓唬你呢
No, come on. Oscar, I was bluffing.
快把我加回租约这样不公平
Put me back on the lease, this isn't fair.
我说你们你知道吗
And hey, excuse me, for what it's worth,
你们这局赢了的人
for those of you keeping score,
你们这样对待我简直太盖世太保了
this treatment is actually quite Gestapo-like.
我猜我猜我猜猜猜
对亲爱的考特尼正确答案是"有袋类"
That's right, Courtney love, the correct answer was "marsupials."
你能猜到...
Could you have guessed that--
你这个满头头发却没戴眼镜的哈利·波特
You full-haired Harry Potter without glasses.
你这是怎么回事
What the hell happened to you?
头发移植雷射矫视手术
Hair transplant, laser eye surgery,
私人造型
personal stylist.
都多亏了你啊
All thanks to you.
你给我的福利简直太棒了
Those benefits you gave me were great!
有人见过我的斗鸡眼卡斯提尔人女仆吗
Has anyone seen my cross-eyed Castilian chamber maid?
把假发给我约翰快把假发给我
Get me the wig, John. Hand me the wig!
我意识到室友就跟植物一样
So I realized roommates are a lot like plants.
你好好对待他们他们就会开花
Treat them right and they'll blossom.
所以我的名字写到租约上了白纸黑字
So I got on the lease. Print.
我原来就是嘉莉
I am the Carrie.
慕兰尼的人生
第一季第七集