雷蒙·斯尼奇的不幸历险（2017）

A Series of Unfortunate Events S02E06

Part 1 July 20, 2020, 3:03 p.m.

雷蒙斯尼奇的不幸历险第二季第六集
改编自雷蒙·斯尼奇原著
Look away
别看了
Look away
别看了
Look away
快别看了
Look away
真心别看了
This show will wreck your evening,
看了这剧晚上睡不着
your whole life and your day
白天闷得慌人生都绝望
Every single episode
每一集
is nothing but dismay
都只会让你心塞
So look away
所以别看了
Look away
别看了
Look away
别看了
The town of VFD
VFD这座小镇
Is full of people full of rules
有着一群镇民和一堆规矩
The Quagmires have once again
奎格梅尔兄妹再一次
Been kidnapped for their jewels
因为蓝宝石而遭人绑♥架♥
The Baudelaires must rescue them
小波德莱尔们想营救他们
But end up getting jailed
却自己身陷囫囵
You might hope that things improve
你可能希望事情出现好转
But I'm afraid that ship has sailed
但那恐怕是没机会了
Just look a way
快别看了
Look away
别看了
There's nothing but horror
等待你的只有
and inconvenience on the way
恐怖和麻烦
Ask any stable person
去随便问个正常的人
should I watch
"这剧该看吗"
and they'll say
他们都会告诉你
look away
"赶紧别看了"
Look away
别看了
Look away
别看了
Look away
别看了
Look away
别看了
Look away
别看了
Look away
别看了
Look away
别看了
Look away
别看了
恶劣村庄
下
奥拉夫伯爵死了
奥拉夫伯爵死了
闻名世界的演员/坏蛋的尸体被当局发现
怎么逃
不可食
VFD官方法规
暴民来了
我恐怕有坏消息你不会想听到的
I'm afraid I have some bad news that you will not like to hear,
就是这世上有些人
which is that there are some people in this world
他们喜欢听到坏消息
who enjoy hearing bad news.
我听说奥拉夫伯爵昨晚在牢房♥里被杀了
I heard Count Olaf was murdered in his jail cell last night.
这真是坏消息
That's bad news.
我本来还很期待今早把他烧死在柱子上
I was excited to burn him at the stake.
对于一个人来说的坏消息
What is bad news to one person
对于其他人可能是好消息
might be good news to someone else.
有时看似的好消息
And sometimes, what seems like good news...
奥拉夫伯爵被杀了
Count Olaf's been murdered?
奥拉夫才没有被杀那是雅克·斯尼奇
Olaf hasn't been murdered at all. That's Jacques Snicket.
其实是一件非常难过痛苦悲伤的事
...might actually be something full of sadness, misery and grief.
我叫雷蒙·斯尼奇
My name is Lemony Snicket.
波德莱尔孤儿们的故事让我难忘
The story of the Baudelaire orphans haunts me
就像在这个尘土飞扬的小村庄里
the way my brother's death haunts me
我哥哥的死让我难忘
in a small, dusty town.
这让我非常难过痛苦悲伤
It fills me with sadness, misery and grief.
但你完全没必要像我这样心神不安
But you have no reason to be as haunted as I am.
别看了这不是你们该看到的
Look away. This is nothing you ought to see.
走吧孩子们这不是你们该看到的
Let's go, children. This is nothing you ought to see.
别急啊伙计
Not so fast, daddy-o.
在犯罪现场打发走嫌犯可不好
It's just not cool to dismiss suspects at the scene of a crime.
嫌犯
Suspects?
如果说有谁犯下了这罪行那也是你
If anyone committed this crime, it was you.
跟杜邦警探顶嘴尤其不好
It's extra just not cool to disagree with Detective Dupin.
你名字不是杜邦警探
Your name isn't Detective Dupin, it's...
大家安静聚过来
Silence in the crowd! Gather round!
长者议会召集了紧急村集♥会♥
The Council of Elders has called this emergency town meeting.
最近有好多的紧急村集♥会♥啊
There have been a lot of emergency meetings lately.
我落下好多事
I'm fallin' way behind on my stories.
我们务必要谈论这桩迷案
It's imperative that we discuss this most mysterious murder.
我不认为这是"务必"的
I don't think it's imperative.
我认为这是绝对必要的
I think it is absolutely necessary.
"务必"就是"绝对必要"的意思埃斯梅
"Imperative" means "absolutely necessary," Esmé.
我不叫埃斯梅
My name is not Esmé.
我叫莎拉·佩图妮娅·雅莉桑卓·玛丽艾拉
It's Sarah Petunia Alexandra Maryellen.
她昨天是这么说的吗
Is that what she said yesterday?
但一如既往你们可以喊我卢恰纳警官
But as always, you call me Officer Luciana.
我有责任把犯人锁在村北监狱
It's my duty to lock up prisoners in the Uptown Jail,
我确保了雅克昨晚被锁在了他的牢房♥里
and I make sure Jacques was safe in his cell last night.
雅克是谁
Who's Jacques?
是我给奥拉夫伯爵起的外号♥
It's my nickname for Count Olaf.
我拿着牢房♥唯一的钥匙
I have the only key to the jail,
所以他的死是个谜团
so his death is a mystery.
我就喜欢谜团
I do love a mystery.
尤其是发生在温馨小村庄
Especially when it takes place in a cozy village
主角是口音奇怪的警探的那种
and stars a detective with a funny voice.
没错发霉老家伙们
You're right, moldy oldies.
但你们走运了我是个能上镜的厉害警探
But lucky for you cats, I'm a peachy detective with a face for TV
我已经解决了这桩案子
and I've already cracked this Popsicle case.
太刺♥激♥了
This is so exciting!
这太可怕了一个无辜者死了
It's horrible. An innocent person is dead.
我跟你们一样震惊波德莱尔们
I'm just as shocked as you are, Baudelaires.
但你们最该清楚奥玛伯爵根本不无辜
But you of all people know that Count Omar was far from innocent.
奥拉夫伯爵
Count Olaf.
是啊光是提名字都叫人胆寒
Yes, see? Even the name gives the shivers.
那条浓密的眉毛和他脚踝上的眼睛文身
That bushy eyebrow and tattoo of that eye on his ankle.
那文身不是眼睛是VFD三个字母
The tattoo wasn't of an eye. It was the letters V-F-D.
那没道理
Well, that doesn't make sense.
奥拉夫伯爵怎么会把村子的名字文在脚踝上
Why would Count Olaf have the name of this town on his ankle?
我们不知道
We don't know.
但我们知道那人才是真奥拉夫伯爵
But we do know that man's the real Count Olaf.
那个警官是埃斯梅·斯瓜勒
And that police officer is Esmé Squalor.
他们绑♥架♥了奎格梅尔们
They kidnapped the Quagmires
现在又杀了雅克·斯尼奇
and now they murdered Jacques Snicket.
这些小家伙疯了我是个酷酷的执法官
These kittens have flipped. I am a groovy man of the law, man.
我谁都不会伤害的
I wouldn't harm the hair on a shoofly.
但听好了村民们
But reconnoiter this, villagers.
波德莱尔们把他们的小手指指向了我
The Baudelaires are pointing their bony little fingers at me
其实他们才绝对是
because they are, in fact, 100%...
杀人犯
the murderers.
波德莱尔们不可能是杀人犯他们是孩子
These Baudelaires can't be the murderers. They're children.
杜邦警探你肯定有证据证明
Detective Dupin, you must have evidence
这令人震惊的帅气指控吧
for this startling and handsome accusation.
当然了女警官
Correcto, lady cop.
没有证据
It's just not cool
就指控人杀人可不好
to accuse people of murder without having evidence.
你们走运我是个好警探我找到了证据
Lucky for you, I'm a great detective and I found some.
孤儿们都很讨厌
Orphans are dragsville, man.
他们来到你们的村子潜入你们的监狱
They come into your village, sneak into your jail.
他们杀戮抢掠
They kill and they pillage.
靠的是这个
With the help of these!
蓝鸟蓝天蓝莓派
Blue bird. Blue sky. Blueberry pie.
蓝图哦
Blueprints! Yeah, man.
波德莱尔们就是用这个
That's what the Baudelaires used
找到了墙上的薄弱点
to find a weak space in the wall,
然后再用
so they could use...
那是个什么玩意
Uh, what is that thing?
应该是某种机械装置
I think it's some kind of mechanical device.
是啊一台坏坏的机械装置