辛普森一家
The Simpsons S31E03
Part 1
Nov. 16, 2019, 11:03 a.m.
别挡我的道
Come on, out of my way!
我开车去教堂的时候怎么不堵车
Where was this traffic when I was driving to church?
侯默 冷静
Homie, calm down.
我们不会错过圣卡斯特兰纳塔节
We're not going to miss the San Castellaneta Festival.
我爱圣卡斯特兰纳塔
I love San Castellaneta.
美味的食物 友好的人
Delicious food, wonderful people.
就像在意大利一样
It's just like being in Italy.
但是其街道宽得正适合我的体型
But with streets that are wide enough I can fit in them.
我喜欢危险的游戏座椅
And I love the rides that are dangerous
因为设施已经100年了
because they're 100 years old.
倾斜转椅
破伤风之塔
小马慢走
抓住老农民
几乎走不满一圈
圣卡斯特兰纳塔节
煎饼卷 通心粉 披萨 意面 冰激凌
抓紧了 孩子们 开始了
Hold on, kids. Here we go.
我赢了一头骡子和一头公牛才得到这份工作
I beat out a mule and an ox for this job.
诀窍就是别问福利
The secret is not to ask for benefits.
*给我披萨 给我通心粉*
*Give me pizza, give me pasta*
*给我好多好多煎饼卷*
*Give me lots of cannoli*
*我要喝茴香酒喝到吐*
*I'll drink sambuca till I puke-a*
*然后再吃冰激凌*
*Then I'll finish with spumoni*
*喝到两条腿摇摇晃晃*
*Drink until my legs are Jell-O*
*廉价红酒和柠檬酒*
*Cheap red wine and limoncello*
你要我们从节日上给你
You want us to bring you anything back
带点什么吗 小东
from the festival, Tone?
不用 那都是碳水
No. It's all carbs.
我不想让人觉得我很胖
I don't want people to think I'm fat.
但你的名字叫胖东尼
But your name is Fat Tony.
名字没毛病
It blends.
真不敢相信你竟然不去
I can't believe you're not going,
我都把你叔叔从西西里带过来了
after I flew out your uncle from Sicily.
-白♥痴♥ -正是因为这个冰冷的眼神
- Idiota! - That icy glare
我才离开了那个国家
is why I left the old country.
守口如瓶 你根本不能领会我的心情
Tightlips, you do a poor job of reading my moods.
但你是我唯一可以信任的人
But you're the only one I trust.
去吧 享受节日
Go. Enjoy your festival
我就坐在这里 跟叔叔交流感情
while I sit here bonding with my uncle.
你也想去节日玩吗 齐奥
Do you want to go to the festival, Zio?
我是为了火人节才来这个国家的
I came to this country for the Burning Man.
我死之前
Before I die,
我想看裸体脆皮炸鸡骑自行车
I want to see a naked crunchy chick riding a bicycle.
*每个人都有开心事*
*Everybody has a treat*
红酒
-哦也 -那是希腊语 警长
- Opa! - That's Greek, Chief.
阿卢 圣·自作聪明节是什么时候
Hey, Lou, when's the festival for Saint Know-It-All?
-我记得是十月 -根本没有这个节
- Uh, I believe it's October the... - There isn't one!
没有人喜欢自作聪明的人 蠢蛋
Nobody likes a know-it-all. Idiot.
我们有炸面饼圈 酒烩肉卷
Hey, we got a-zeppole, we got a-braciole,
腌火腿 海螺状营养糊糊
capicola, scungilli,
还有这个我不知道是啥的东东
and I don't know what the hell-a this is.
你能把它们放一起煎一下吗
Can you make it all in one thing and fry it?
我知道你想干嘛
I saw-a you coming.
这地方看着很有意思
Ooh. This place looks interesting.
老爸别去 那是一座真正的教堂
Dad, no, that's an actual church.
无麸质饮食女士们的交流会
吃 喝 投票给昆毕
欢迎大家来到这个
Welcome, everyone, to this festival
不庆祝克里斯托弗·哥伦布的节日
that does not celebrate Christopher Columbus.
再说一遍 不是哥伦布
repeat: not Columbus.
正当我们站在
As we stand here at the corner
妮娜 皮娜和圣玛利亚街的转角
of Niña and Pinta and Santa Maria,
让我们欢迎庆典的主持人
let us welcome your master of cere-spumonies,
海王本王
Aquaman himself,
杰森·莫哦哦玛
Jason Morororora.
我很荣幸今天能站在陆地上
It is an honor to be here on land today
详述有关这位伟大圣人的振奋人心的故事
to recount the inspiring story of this great saint.
-海王 -在我的左胸上签名吧
- Aquaman. - Sign my left boob.
请签在这里
海王在这里不是为了在胸上签名
Aquaman is not here for the signing of boobs.
那是另一场在万豪酒店C会议室的活动
That's a separate event at the Marriott. Conference room C.
公元250年 伊格那丢·卡斯特兰纳塔兄弟
In 250 A.D., Brother Ignatius Castellaneta
拒绝公开宣布他放弃信仰基♥督♥教
refused to recant his Christian faith.
于是罗马人砍下他的头
And so the Romans chopped off his head,
他们砍下他的手臂
they chopped off his arms,
他们砍下他的腿 和他的脚趾
they chopped off his legs, and they chopped off his toes.
他们用冻住的蛇做成的箭射他
They shot him with arrows made of frozen snakes
拔出他的眼睛 并把他的眼珠
and they pulled out his eyes and replaced them
换成了巧克力脆皮开心果
with chocolate-covered pistachios.
但是伊格那丢依然拒绝屈服
But still, Ignatius refused to recant.
所以他们用樱桃起泡酒煮了他的骨头
So they boiled his bones in sparkling cherry wine.
这就是为什么要用意大利千层冰激凌
So that's why the thrice-martyred saint
纪念这位三次殉道圣人
is remembered with spumoni,
巧克力脆皮开心果樱桃冰激凌
the chocolate pistachio cherry ice cream treat.
不好吃
Ugh. Not good.
好了 谢谢你 超级鱼
Uh, yes, uh, thank you, Super-Fish.
现在 让我们展示出对耶稣深厚的敬意
And now, let us show our deep reverence for Jesus
用美钞装饰过的耶稣的雕塑
by festooning his statue with dollar bills.
在耶稣身上贴美钞 侯默
Pin a dollar on Jesus, Homer.
他不需要钱
He doesn't need money.
我听说他爸富得流油
I hear his father's loaded.
我的钱包去哪了
Hey, where's my wallet?
我的钱包也不见了
Yeah, my wallet's gone, too.
-我的手提包 -我的腰带
- My purse! - My belt!
我的女式无带手提包
My clutch!
我们都是泛滥的偷包案的受害者
We are the victims of a pocket-picking pandemic.
做点什么 水豹[恶搞黑豹]
Do something, Wet Panther!
无名三只手真的偷了那么多钱包吗
Peter Piper picked a peck of pocket wallets?
钱包去哪了
其偷包的行为导致多少人流离失所
How many paupers did Peter's pocket picking produce?
恐怕在盯裤子狂魔面前没有一条裤子能幸免
I'm afraid no pants are safe from this Dockers stalker,
长裤强盗 翻裤子的贼
this chino bandito, this trouser browser.
但是韦警长表示 他一定解决这个谜团
But Chief Wiggum vows he will solve this pickle of a puzzle.
我已经解决了
Oh, I solved it, all right.
范围
穿蓝色制♥服♥的男性
有礼貌的小偷 有礼貌的小偷
"Thief of polite." "Thief of polite."
我先说的
I said it first!
韦根 我不想打扰你处理这么重要的警务工作
Wiggum, I hate to interrupt this important police work...
警♥察♥ 哦对 警♥察♥的小偷
"Police." That's it. "Thief of police."
我得用遥控器换台到《直通好莱坞》呢
Hey! I need that to switch to Access Hollywood.
你需要的可不止如此
You need a lot more than that.
我是莱诺拉·卡特
I'm Lenora Carter,
总检察长办公室的特别调查员
special investigator from the attorney general's office,
我来接手这件案子
and I'm taking over this case.
女士 你看起来人不错
Uh, look, ma'am, you seem nice,
但是没有人能在我的辖区里对我指手画脚
but no one comes into my precinct and tells me what to do.
-闭嘴 给我听好了 -是 长官
- Shut up and listen. - Yes, ma'am.
你是我见过最差劲的警♥察♥ 我还是第一次
You are the worst police officer I've ever had the pleasure
想要当着其手下的面羞辱一个人
of humiliating in front of his men.
死肥猪 你是好警♥察♥也是坏警♥察♥
You are so fat, you're good cop and bad cop.
你的搜毒犬在戒毒
Your drug-sniffing dog is in rehab.
其实是要戒性瘾
Okay, it's for sex addiction.
甜甜圈
还有你们 两个好基友
You there! Riggs and Murtaugh.
是时候干点真正的警♥察♥该干的活了
It's time to do some real police work.
我知道了 行吧 你们继续
I see, fine. No, go ahead.
我去射击场上释放一下情绪
I'll go work out my feelings on the gun range.
我们没有射击场
We don't have a gun range!
春田警♥察♥局
我们用装了定♥位♥器♥的钱包设下圈套
We'll trap the pickpocket by planting a wallet with a tracer
放在一个巨大的屁♥股♥里 任何罪犯都不会错过
in a rear end so huge, no criminal could miss it.
-我们要找到镇子上最大的屁♥股♥ -你们好
- We need to find the biggest ass in town. - Hello.
能告诉我去公园长椅拆除办公室的路怎么走吗
Could you direct me to the Office of Park Bench Removal?
先坐一下 先生
Yeah, just take a seat, sir.
谢谢 我自己带了座
Thank you, I have my own.
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