辛普森一家
The Simpsons S31E16
Part 2
May 26, 2020, 8:24 a.m.
What did you say?
我刚才的意思是
What I meant to say was,
你的这种态度嘟嘟嘟会改变的
oodily-doodily, we'll change that atti-toodily.
钓鱼
Fishing?
一种增强注意力的药品
我还没有服用利他林呢
When I didn't take a Ritalin?
-你太残忍♥了 -别说了
- You monster. - Hush.
你如果什么都没钓到 我们今晚就没东西吃
If you don't catch something, we don't eat tonight.
愚蠢的垂钓
Stupid fishing.
愚蠢的平静
Stupid peace and quiet.
愚蠢的日落
Stupid sunset.
这里绚丽多彩
Thinks it has so many colors.
非常的美丽 金光灿烂
So beautiful and bright and golden and...
看看你的鱼竿 巴仔 鱼咬钩了
Mind your line, Bart. You got a nibble.
我抓到了 抓到了
I've got it! I've got it!
我亲手杀了一条鱼
I murdered a fish. Me, by myself.
别太骄傲 孩子
Don't get cocky, son.
你还要清理一下鱼然后吃掉
You've still got to clean it and eat it.
首先 我们要生火
First things first, we got to start a fire.
用什么生火
Uh, with what?
我们自己动手来成就自我
We'll build character by building it ourselves.
该你了
Your turn.
我手好疼
Oh, my hands hurt.
我们是有童工法的
There are child labor laws, you know.
这是最笨蛋的
This is the most idiotic...
-你感觉如何 -很好 为什么会这样
- How do you feel? - Great. But why?
这就叫做成就感 孩子
Well, it's called "Accomplishment", Son--
是一个靠你自己努力赢得的
something you've earned yourself
别人夺不走的东西
that can never be taken from you.
左撇子握手
Left-handed handshake.
既然你现在已步入正轨
And now that you're on your way,
没人知道你还能多优秀
there's no telling how far you'll go.
*奇异恩典*
*Amazing grace*
*何等甘甜*
*How sweet the sound... *
我的天呐
Oh, my goodness.
我们的儿子从来不会那样唱歌♥
Our little boy could never sing like that before.
我觉得他唱的不怎么好
Well, if you ask me, he's not doing so well now.
令人惊讶
Mm. Remarkable.
我以为让巴仔变成小天使的唯一办法
I thought the only way to turn Bart into a little angel
是弄断水上乐园的电线
was a downed power line at a water park.
你一定很自豪
Ah, you must be so proud.
你成功让那孩子改邪归正了
You really turned that boy around.
过奖了
Oh. Well...
恭喜你
Congratulations,
内德·弗兰德斯
Ned Flanders.
做的好 弗兰德斯
Yeah. Way to go there, Flanders.
你太棒了 内德
You the man, Ned.
你们不能把所有的功劳都归于他
Hey, you can't give him all the credit.
是我们先把他教坏的
We're the ones who messed him up in the first place.
听着 愚蠢的弗兰德斯
Uh, listen, stupid Flanders,
我是来表达谢意的
I just want to say thank you,
要是有什么我能帮上忙的...
and if there's anything I can do for you...
首先 你可以不要再叫我
Well, for starters, you could stop calling me
愚蠢的弗兰德斯
"Stupid Flanders."
开始了开始了
Oh, here we go.
不 就这一条
No, that's it.
谢谢 弗兰德斯
Thank you, Flanders.
没那么难吧
Was that so hard?
他正在胡子后面偷笑呢
He was laughing under that mustache.
你们在这里干嘛
What are you doing here?
巴仔在做数学作业
Bart's actually doing math homework.
我想亲眼看看
I wanted to see it for myself.
等一下下
Bup-up-up-up!
听着 我能辅♥导♥我自己的孩子
Listen, I can help my own kid.
我想想看
Uh, let's see.
四又三分之二加六分之五等于
Four and two-thirds plus five-sixths equals,
算一算
uh, uh, carry the math...
然后...
And, uh...
惨了 作业被狗吃掉了
Oh, no! The dog ate it!
问题不大 我已经做完了
It's okay, Dad. I finished it.
在弗兰德斯先生的帮助下
With Mr. Flanders' help.
看起来我没什么用处了
Well, it looks like I'm useless.
让我带着最后一点尊严离去吧
Let me just walk away with my dignity.
又肥又没用
*我还能向谁求助*
*Who can I turn to*
沮丧黛百货公♥司♥
[原为布鲁明黛百货公♥司♥]
*当没人再需要我*
*When nobody needs me*
我的儿子不爱我
My son doesn't love me.
[西语]你现在很难过 但你的儿子是欣赏你的
等他长大了 他会懂得尊重你
你根本没听懂我说了啥
You don't get me at all.
春田垃圾场
逗留了五万只海鸥 不会错的
孩子 我也很伤心
Hey, kid. I'm sad, too.
你不应该一个人在这里
You shouldn't be out here alone.
没人在乎我
Oh, nobody cares.
爸爸离开了
My dad left.
妈妈是个酒鬼
My mom's a drunk.
我住在拖车里 轮胎都是瘪的
My house is a trailer, and all the wheels are flat.
我最后一口干粮是一块冰块
My last solid food was an ice cube.
我的电视是装着一只松鼠的牛奶箱
My TV is a milk crate with a squirrel in it.
这孩子真惨
This kid is such a wreck,
连我都有资格帮他
even I could help him.
还能借此机会报复巴仔
Which I could use to get back at Bart.
该理发时我就躲在灌木丛后
I get my hair cut by hiding in the bushes
等修剪的园丁来
when the gardener comes by.
我要去做吗
Am I gonna do it?
利用一个孩子的感情去伤害
Is it wrong to take advantage of one child's feelings
另一个孩子 有错吗
to make another child feel bad?
没人知道答案
Nobody has the answer to that.
孩子 我来帮你
Here, son. Let me help.
好了好了 擦擦吧
Okay, okay. Enough snot.
孩子 你想不想要个导师
Say, uh, listen, kid, how would you like a mentor?
导师是什么
What's a mentor?
就是一种特殊的老师
A mentor is a special kind of teacher.
但你啥都不会
But you don't know nothing.
我能教你的多着呢
Hey, there's lots I can teach you.
如何偷走派里的馅
How to steal filling from a pie.
怎样不用流血就能得到饼干
How to get cookies without giving blood.
用薄荷口香糖怎么除臭
How to use spearmint gum as a deodorant.
也许我还会带你去看牙医
And maybe I'll get someone to fix your teeth.
竟然存在只看牙的医生吗
There's a doctor for your teeth?
你能教我这迷宫怎么走吗
Can you teach me how to do this maze?
咱俩一块研究研究
Well, it'll be a project we can work on together.
酷
Cool.
等我一下 我没番茄酱了
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm out of ketchup.
我抄完
I'll give it back
就还你
when I'm done.
巴仔
Hello, Bart.
跟你说一声我要去内尔森家了
Just wanted you to know I'm going to Nelson's house.
我俩很亲密 非常亲密
We're close. Super close.
首先爸爸 你打给了我
First of all, Dad, you called me.
其次你给内尔森做导师
And second, are you mentoring Nelson
就为了报复巴仔吗
just to get back at Bart?
才不是
No! No way!
但你要碰到巴仔记得给他看照片
But if you happen to see Bart, show him these.
发件人 爸爸
四张图片 下载
孩子 我打算教你收拾行李的速招
Okay, kid, I'm gonna teach you how to pack
适用于你老婆要把你赶出家门时
for when your wife kicks you out of the house.
衣服都扔到前院吗
Are the clothes thrown out onto the front yard?
先假设你有时间去拿个行李箱
Well, let's say you have enough time to get a suitcase.
什么是行李箱
What's a suitcase?
好吧 咱教点别的
Uh, all right, let's move on to something else.
但我得先问你 你跟我妈睡过吗
辛普森一家
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