辛普森一家
The Simpsons S31E03
Part 2
Nov. 16, 2019, 11:03 a.m.
我不能让我的丈夫冒生命危险
I'm not letting my husband risk his life.
我承认 我很害怕
I admit it, I'm scared.
女士 这是关系到公众的紧急事件
Ma'am, this is a matter of public urgency.
你丈夫的臀部比咱俩加起来都大
Your husband's rear end is bigger than the both of us.
有了你孩子的允许
With your kids' permission,
就能看到你父亲用屁♥股♥把案子搞定
we can watch your father's butt crack this case wide open.
搞定
"Wide open."
侯默 我们把跟踪设备放在你的钱包里
Homer, we're placing this tracking device in your wallet.
然后你就带着这块肥美的诱饵四处乱逛就好了
Then you just have to put that sweet seat meat on the street.
让我把你的钱包往上拉一点
Now let me pull your wallet up
这样它就能刚好露出来一点
so it's just peeking over the pocket.
别别别 让我来
Uhp-bup-bup. Allow me.
选一张卡 随便选
Pick a card. Any card.
谢天谢地这个人是我们这边的
Thank God that thing is on our side.
亲吻镜头
我们锁定到目标了
We've got our target.
你在这干什么
What are you doing here?
我承认
I admit it,
我不能退出 我在跟踪你们
I couldn't stay away. I was following you.
我正好在开车兜风哄拉尔夫睡觉
Also, I was driving around to put Ralphie to sleep.
这孩子就是不肯睡觉
That kid will not go down.
我是个乐透球 你又输了 爸爸
I'm a lotto ball. You lose again, Daddy.
准备行动
We're going in.
喂喂喂 除了你
Ah-ah-ah. Except you.
与你工作了大半辈子的同事
Ah, you work with two guys all your life
你自以为了解他们
and you think you know 'em.
却被他们背叛 阿卢还有那个谁
Betrayed by Lou and, uh, the other guy.
他叫啥来着
What is his name again?
可能是葛列格
I-I want to say Greg.
叔叔 客人就像鱼 三天就发臭
You know, Uncle, guests, like fish, stink after three days.
我早告诉过你 无数次
I told you once, I told you a thousand times,
我不会离开 除非我妻子原谅我
I'm not leaving until my wife forgives me.
-她死了 -你总替她说话
- She's dead. - You always take her side!
警♥察♥ 你们在这干嘛
Cops? What are you doing here?
我们被陷害了 这些是什么
This is a setup. W-What are these things?
不是说这有个快闪式亚洲风格融合餐厅
I was told this was an Asian fusion pop-up restaurant,
亚洲人在哪 也没见融合啊
but I see no Asian nor fusion.
马里昂·安东尼·达米哥
Marion "Fat Tony" D'Amico,
你将以扒窃团伙头目嫌疑人身份被逮捕
you're under arrest for heading a pickpocket ring.
但我从没见过这些钱包
But I've never seen these wallets before.
房♥间怎么在旋转
The-the room is spinning.
原来这就是无辜的感觉
So this is what it feels like to be innocent.
原来这就是与我无关的感觉
And this is how it feels to be irrelevant.
爸爸是大象
Daddy's an elephant.
不我不是大象 拉尔夫
No-no, I'm not an elephant, Ralphie,
你可要牢记
and-and please don't you forget it.
恶棍老老实实吃牢饭
钱包街之狼
The Wolf of Wallet Street?
大名鼎鼎的黑帮老大
Reputed mobster
胖东尼·达米哥终难逃法网恢恢
Fat Tony D'Amico is at last behind bars.
我妻子
My wife.
我情人
My goomar.
我的茶杯猪
My teacup pig.
放学接孩子区域
怎么了 警长
What's wrong, Chief?
马姬 你可曾觉得生命流逝
Marge, you ever felt like life has passed you by,
一切变得毫无意义
there's no point?
一段困难时期罢了
Oh, you're just having a rough patch.
人到五十都会有
It happens to all men in their 50s.
我三十八 马姬
I'm 38, Marge.
警长 知道我为什么爱我丈夫吗
Chief, do you know why I love my husband?
出于最浪漫的原因 惯性
For that most romantic of reasons: inertia.
我爱他的无惧失败
I love him because he's not afraid to fail.
他与生俱来的无畏对错的自信 你也值得拥有
He has boundless unjustified confidence, and you should, too.
你真这么觉得吗
Really? You think so?
我突然看到了破云而出的光芒
Boy, suddenly, I-I see a break in the clouds.
我不会让你失望的 马姬
I will not let you down, Marge.
马姬 能把我捎到车站吗
Uh, Marge, can I get a ride to the station?
拉尔夫待在车里就行
Uh, Ralphie will stay with the car.
春田监狱
耙子
明察秋毫的主 贾布罗尼斯和玛玛鲁克人
Dear Lord, who sees all, the jabronis and the mamalukes,
您知道我是无辜的
you know I am innocent.
以主仁慈 享主恩典
In your mercy and by your grace,
帮我惩罚陷害我的犹大吧
help me kneecap the rat Judas who set me up.
阿门
Amen.
万能的主 我不是个爱祷告的人
Almighty God, I'm not a praying man.
对我来说 下跪通常意味着走向不归路
For me, getting down on my knees is often a one-way trip.
我当警♥察♥是跟魔鬼做了交易
I-I know I made a deal with the devil to be chief,
但请先别管它 帮帮我 好吗
but please just ignore that and help me out, will ya?
神啊 让塑料吸管回来吧
Dear Lord, please bring back plastic straws.
纸吸管湿的太快了
The paper ones get soggy so fast.
春田监狱
按您要求 我火速
I brought the mob lawyer right away
把名帮派律师带来了 老板
like you asked, boss.
裤子都没让穿就被押过来了
They wouldn't even let me put my pants on.
差点连收费表都没拿
I was barely able to grab my rate clock.
去他妈的收费表 把我弄出去
Al diavolo rate clock. Get me out of here.
-要快 -稳住 沉住气
- And I mean fast. - Patience. Patience.
他们以什么理由逮捕你
Okay, what have they got you on?
一级谋杀
Murder one
二级谋杀
Murder two?
扒窃 别说那么慢
Pickpocketing! Quit talking slow!
好
All right.
其实我是无辜的
Actually, I'm innocent.
无辜 无辜吗
Innocent?! Innocent?!
法官根本不会信你
A judge wouldn't believe you for a second.
我无能为力了
I've got nothing to work with here.
你还请律师干嘛 就是你干的
What would you even plead? You really did it this time.
不是我♥干♥的
I didn't do it.
我要揍他吗 老板
You want me to whack him, boss?
不用了 带他出去
No! Just usher him out.
好的 我会"带他出去"
Got it. I'll "usher him out."
我是指领他出去
I mean show him the door.
对 我会"领他出去"
Right. I'll "show him the door."
不管你以为的是什么 反着做
Whatever you think I want you to do, just do the opposite!
忘记他吧
胖东尼被判二十年
春田警局
圣卡斯特兰纳塔节录像
东尼·达米哥二十三岁罕见采访
我唯一不会犯的罪行就是扒窃
The one crime I would never commit is pickpocketing.
他看起来很真诚
Huh. He seems sincere.
我就是认真的
I am sincere.
我还是小男孩时 我爸爸法斯托·安东尼奥
When I was a boy, my father, Fatso Antonio,
要做心脏移植手术
needed a heart transplant.
但是那颗心脏在路上被偷了
On its way to the hospital, that heart was pickpocketed.
没有任何伟大的男人该这样死去
My father died the way no made man should die:
竟然是自然死亡
of natural causes.
老天 我发现了一条线索
Oh, my God. I discovered a clue.
我发现了一个电动牙刷
I found an electric toothbrush.
至少他今晚能好好睡觉了
Well, he'll sleep good tonight.
我敢肯定他是无辜的
I can tell he's innocent,
就凭我曾把上百个无辜者送进监狱
with a certainty you can only develop
培养出来的直觉
putting hundreds of innocent people in jail.
韦根的错案
DNA技术总是和我作对
DNA technology has not been my friend.
春田监狱
马桶意面
熄灯了
Lights out!
嘶 嘶 嘶
Psst. Psst, psst.
干嘛偷偷摸摸的 我又不会逃跑
Why do you "Psst" Me? I'm not going anywhere.
我觉得你是无辜的
I think you're innocent.
但是你得努力说服我
But you're gonna have to convince me
无视你过去的那些恶行
to ignore your entire past history.
我并非生而富贵
I was not born a rich man.
在我的成长环境里 只有靠拳头才能生存
Where I grew up, there was one way out: your fists.
辛普森一家
The Simpsons
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