天生冤家（2015）

The Odd Couple S02E13

Part 2 March 5, 2021, 12:51 p.m.

去喝杯酒而已
Oh, just, uh, going to get a drink.
独酌
By myself.
我要一个人喝酒
I'm drinking alone.
那玩得开心
Okay, have fun.
帮我跟奥斯卡问声好
Tell Oscar I said. Hi.
要是没喝得烂醉我会的
I will. If I'm not blotto.
看
Oh, look.
潜伏者奥斯卡
It's Oscar the Crouch.
听着事情是这样的
All right, look, here's the deal.
自从夏洛特和我"按下暂停"
It's been three months since Charlotte and I
已经过了三个月
"Pressed pause," or whatever she called it,
现在只要我们相互一见到
and now whenever we see each other,
就很奇怪我不知道手往哪儿放
it's weird-- I don't know what to do with my hands
胳膊往哪儿放 "下面"也是
or my arms or my nether regions.
所以你就藏起来了
So you just hide?
或者逃跑或者打伞遮脸
Or run. Or open an umbrella in front of my face.
我有的是选择
I've got options.
不好她来了
Oh, no, here she comes.
奥斯卡
Oscar?
看啊他就在那儿
Oh, wow-- there he is right there.
你手里拿的是什么一封信
So, what do you got going there, a little mail?
一封信我是男"信"
Little mail action. I'm a male.
拼法不同也无所谓
Spelled differently. Doesn't matter.
我该走了
Well, I should get going.
你也是
Yeah, you, too.
奥斯卡我知道对你来说很难
Oh, Oscar, look, I know this is hard for you,
但你得向前看跟其他人约会
but you have got to move on and see other people.
走吧我们边喝酒边聊
Come on, we'll talk about it over drinks.
去不了
I can't.
我动不了
I'm stuck.
这是我们今天第二次
This is the second time today
不得不这么做了
that we've had to do this.
得了吧伙计们我讨厌在线约会
Oh, come on, guys, I hate online dating.
我不想回到情场中了
I don't want to go back to that.
潜伏在门卫桌子后面看够了女人是不是
Meeting enough women cowering behind the doorman's desk, are we?
莫夫你有什么主意
All right, Murph, what do you got?
现在有很多交♥友♥网♥站
Well, there's a lot of dating Web sites out there,
"融爱"是最好的了
but LoveMerge is by far the best.
为什么
And why is that?
因为他们付我钱让我这么说
Well, 'cause they pay me to say "LoveMerge is by far the best"
你在那个网站上已经遇见很多女人了
So you've met lots of women on this site?
说实话我不用那个网站
Well, to be honest, I don't use this site
因为...
because, well...
但它有庞大的用户群
But it's got a big user base, and that's the way
你就应该从这个角度看数量很重要
you got to look at this-- it's a volume business.
他说得对奥斯卡你得回到情场中
You know, he's right, Oscar-- you've got to get back out there.
就像当你最爱的糖果停产时
It's like when they discontinued your favorite candy.
酸甜小粒
Ah, Tart 'n' Tinys.
你伤心了好几周然后找到了真爱
You moped around for weeks, and then you found new love.
原来彩虹糖一直都在
Skittles were right there the whole time.
太对了
Exactly.
我不想用我的真名
Well, I don't want to use my real name
也不想用照片因为我也算个名人
or a photo, 'cause I'm kind of a celebrity.
-有道理 -好
- That's plausible enough, I suppose. - Sure. Yeah.
这事太疯狂了
Okay, this is crazy.
-怎么了 -一年前
- What? - Um, a-a year ago
我申请了
I applied for an internship in London
一家伦敦珠宝设计公♥司♥的实习
for this jewelry design house,
我没被选上但被选上的那个女的被车撞了
and the woman that they hired instead of me got hit by a car--
因为英国的路是左侧行驶
you know, wrong side of the road and all that.
现在他们想让我去
Anyway, now they want me!
天啊
Oh, my God!
恭喜你
Congratulations!
唯一的问题是他们想让我去三个月
Yeah. The only problem is, they want me there for three months.
你需要找个人帮你照顾狗
You're gonna need somebody to take care of your dog
在你家看家你家比我家好多了
and stay in your apartment, which is much nicer than mine.
明白我的意思吗
See where I'm going with this?
三个月真是...
Wow, three months-- that's, uh...
-真是好久 -我知道
- that's a long time. - I know.
我也在考虑这点
I was thinking the same thing.
别闹了
Oh, please.
三个月不算什么的
Three months is nothing.
你家有WiFi吗
Do you have Wi-Fi?
你是怎么打算的
So what are you going to do?
我还没想好一方面
I don't know. I mean, on one hand,
我想改变我的生活
do I really want to uproot my life?
另一方面
But then, on the other hand...
也许是命运
maybe it's fate.
因为我最爱的歌♥是
Because what's my favorite song?
《伦敦大桥垮下来》
"London Bridge Is Falling Down"?
《伦敦狼人》
"Werewolves of London"!
当然了
Oh... of course!
虽然我觉得命运要是想暗示你
Although, I like to think that fate would have
肯定会用首更有品位的歌♥
better musical taste when giving you a sign, so...
你觉得我该怎么办
Well... what do you think I should do?
似乎是个很棒的机会
Well, sounds like a great opportunity.
你这么想吗
You think so?
是啊伦敦是个世界大都市
Yes. I mean, London is a world-class city.
你会接触到崭新的客户群
It would expose you to a whole new client base.
你会得到想要的一切
It could be everything you want.
对那我如果离开这么长时间
Right. So you would have no problem
你不会介意吗
with me being gone for so long?
-我可没说过这话 -但你毫不迟疑
- I never said that. - No, but you didn't... even hesitate.
我因为跟你分离而焦虑
I mean, here I am, stressing out about being away from you,
结果你"去追逐梦想吧"
and you're like, "Follow your dream."
你明白我为什么生气了吗
Can you see why I might be upset?
你会怎么描述我的眼睛
How would you describe my eyes?
目光敏锐还是冰蓝色
Piercing or icy blue?
你说得对我两个都写上
You're right. I'll go with both.
至少装一下跟我分别很困难
At least pretend that it would be hard to say good-bye to me.
当然了跟你分别那么久会要了我的命
Of course. It would kill me to be away from you for so long.
但我不想让你拒绝这个机会
But I don't want you to turn it down
然后余下的人生都在想"如果当初..."
and then spend the rest of your life wondering "What if""
抱歉费里斯
I'm sorry, Felix.
我就是有些迷茫一年前
I'm... I'm just confused. I mean, a year ago
我会毫不犹豫抓住这次机会但是
I would have jumped at this opportunity, but...
我喜欢这里的生活
I love my life here.
我不想离开
I don't want to leave.
-我来唱黑脸好了 -不
- You know, just to play devil's advocate... - No.
我要留下
I am staying.
谁想跟这么棒的男人分开三个月啊
Who would want to spend three months away from this amazing man?
谁都能抢答吗
Is that question open to the room?
-非常机智 -没错
- Quick-witted. - Yeah.
怎么拼写机智的"智"啊
How do you spell "witted"?
莫林我要跟一个女人共进晚餐
Hey, Maureen. I'm meeting a woman for dinner.
还坐你的"出炉桌"吗
You want your dumping table?
不我要坐"首次约会桌"
Nope. My first-date table.
天花板的灯撤掉了不会照得我锃亮
The overhead bulb is out, so I'm not over-lit,
要是她很没劲我正好可以对着电视
and I can face the TV in case she's boring.
奥斯卡
Oh. Hey, Oscar.
你的约会怎么样了
How'd your date go?
结束了吗你把人家弄哭了吗
Is it over? Did you make her cry?
她还没来
She's not here yet.
她说她会穿粉色外衫
She said she'd be wearing a pink sweater.
她来了粉色外衫
Oh, there she is. Pink sweater.
天呐你确定那不是橙红色
Oh, my God. Are you sure that's not salmon?
或淡紫色看起来像淡紫色
Or mauve? It looks mauvey.
你说什么呢那绝对是粉色
What are you talking about? That's definitely pink,
而且她很漂亮你怎么不去见她
and she's cute-- why don't you go meet her?
因为我已经见过了
Because I already have.