大世界之旅（2016）

这台车就更让人看不懂了
compared with this,
利亚特赫利卡
the Leyat Hélica.
谁会想着“我知道了 我们不用轮子驱动
[Jeremy] Who thought, "I know, we won't drive the wheels,
“不行 每个人都是那样做的” -是的
"no, everybody's doing that." -No, no, no, no.
“我们要用螺旋桨来推进”？
"We'll be propelled along by a propeller?"
打个比方,如果你驾车穿过市中心…
If you're driving through a town center, for example,
会发生什么...
[James laughs] -what would happen...
如果你开车撞倒了人,很糟糕
If you knock someone over in a car, it's bad.
但是如果你开这种东西撞倒了人…
But if you knock someone over in that...
就会看到肾,肝脏、内脏
No kidneys, liver, offal,
“不好 又飞来一块…” -不 他们想过这件事
"No, there's another one..." -No. They've thought about this
因为虽然它有螺旋桨
because it's got the propeller,
不过他们已经装了一些铁网
but they've put bits of wire
所以没有人可以把手或头伸进去
so nobody could exactly put their hand through or head
或类似的东西.看到了吗？
or anything like that. You see? -[Jeremy laughs]
这是完美的…
It's perfectly...
它有后座吗？
[James] Has it got a rear seat?
这是一辆两人座的,哈蒙德,和你的马特拉不同
[Jeremy] This is a two-seater, Hammond, unlike your Matra.
在你知道自己
[James] Would you get in there
完全无法控制任何一个元件时你会进去吗？
knowing you have absolutely no control over any of that?
只有踏板的汽车
[Richard] A car with just pedals.
它不像是飞机你有双重控制或其他东西，而不是一个踏板
[James] It's not like an airplane where you've got dual controls or something else than a pedal.
那会是疯狂之举… -你只能坐在那里
It would be mad... -You just sit there.
我认为它很棒
[Richard] I think it's brilliant.
这是… -我是说,看
[James] It is brilliant. -I mean, look,
我很欣赏它,但是…
I admire it, but...
他们把它带到 《龙穴之创业投资》节目去了吗？
Did they take it on the Dragon's Den?
“这是我对旅行方式的想法”
[in French accent] "Here is my thought for a way of traveling."
但是等一下… -你认为它能用吗？
But hang on a minute... -[Richard] Do you think it works?
嗯,我确定它可以
[Jeremy] Well, I'm sure it does.
等等,看,那边有…
[Richard] Hang on, look, there's...
应该不是用钥匙打火的.会需要一些操作
You don't start it with a key. There'll be some fiddling.
“前进”和“减速” 我还是选减速吧
"Advance" and "Retard." I'll retard it.
你要帮它发动吗？
Are you gonna prime it?
压缩点在那里.你准备好了吗？
[James] Compression point is there. Ready?
我都不知道会发生什么!怎么准备?
I don't know what's gonna happen! How can I be ready?
你的脚踩刹车了吗？ -我准备好了吗？
[James] Got your feet on the brakes? -[Richard] Am I ready?
是的 -这东西没动啊
Yes. -[Jeremy] The thing's not moving.
我一切就绪了 开始吧 -准备好了？
I've got everything. Yeah, go. -That's the concern. And...
它没有动 -再试一次
It didn't go. -Try again.
接触？ -确认
Contact? -Yes.
发电机启动了？ -确认
Mags on? -Yes.
脚踩着刹车吗？ -确认
Feet on brakes? -Yes.
我要开始了
I'm gonna do it. -[Richard yelps]
它没法发动 -你准备好了吗？
[Jeremy] It won't start. -Are you ready?
我真的以为这样就可以了
[James] I really thought that was it.
这诠释了什么叫“令人扫兴” 不是吗？
It's the definition of anti-climax, isn't it?
这将是一辆很棒的救护车,或者消防车
This would be a great ambulance. Or fire engine.
真棒 -是的
Brilliant. -Yeah.
油门就绪？ -就绪
Throttle set? -Yes.
开始了 -好的
Here we go. -Yes.
别担心
Don't worry,
赫利卡先生正作为急救车在赶来的路上
Monsieur Hélica is on his way as the emergency vehicle.
“别担心,火有多大？”
"Don't worry. How big is the fire?"
等等
Hang on.
"你胸口的疼痛"
[in French accent] "These pains in your chest,"
"是越来越严重还是越来越轻？"
"are they getting worse or better?"
对,继续唠叨吧
[James] Right, mag on.
这要遇红灯时熄火会是件麻烦事,不是吗？
I'll tell you what, a stall at the lights would be a bugger, wouldn't it?
“让我…抱歉 麻烦帮个忙…”
"I'll just... Excuse me..."
因为这工作需要两个人
[Jeremy] 'Cause it's a two-man job.
这是个好位置
[James] That's a good position. Here we go.
好的 我们开始
All right, here we go.
开始！
Go! -[yells]
我想带它去兜个风！
[Richard shouting] I think I'll take it for a drive!
什么？ -我要带它去兜风！
What? -I'm gonna take it for a drive!
什么,你？快逃！快点逃命！
What, you? Run! Run for your life!
在它首次面世时,有六百人报名想要一台
When it was unveiled to the world, 600 people put their name down for one.
六百个有知觉的人类
Six hundred sentient human beings,
能自己系鞋带并自行使用厕所的人类觉得
who could tie their own shoe laces and use a lavatory, said,
“是的 我想要一辆这种车”
"Yes, I want one of those."
很难理解为什么它没有流行起来
It's very hard to see why it didn't catch on.
这里面确实很吵,很令人惊讶
It is quite loud in here, surprisingly so.
这可能是一个因素
That could be a factor.
听说它可以达到每小时170公里
Apparently it's good for a 106 miles an hour.
我认为它可以更快一点
I reckon it can do more.
来吧！加油！
Come on! Come on, come on!
我觉得人们可能觉得
I think people are bored
观看车祸现场会有些乏味,所以我们继续推进吧,因为…
of watching these crashes now, so let's move on, because...
即使某些法国车看起来很普通
even when French cars seem to be normal,
你不需要过度深究即可发现,实际上
you don't have to look too far below the surface to find that, actually,
它们通常都不普通
they're usually not.
现在让我们来看看雷诺4
Now, let's take this one, the Renault 4.
当时一款较为简单的汽,但…
A reasonably straightforward car for the time, but...
这一侧的轮子之间的距离是2.4米
The distance between the wheels on this side is 94 inches.
而在这一侧,车轮之间的距离为2.3米
Whereas on this side, the distance between the wheels is 92 inches.
为什么？
Why?
我不知道
I've got no idea.
然后是雷诺21
Then there's the Renault 21.
看起来相当平凡,其实不然 因为…
Looks boring, but it isn't,
在这个1.7升的型号♥中,发动机是侧向的
because in this 1.7-liter model, the engine is sideways,
而在这个2升的型号♥中
whereas in this 2-liter model,
它是纵向的
it's lengthwise.
这意味着,它需要更长的侧翼、不同的引擎盖
That meant this needed, longer wings and a different bonnet
和不同的副车架…
and a different subframe... -[car crashes]
哈蒙德刚刚撞车了是吗？ -是的
Hammond's just crashed, hasn't he? -[man] Yep.
总之.这是一个极其复杂和昂贵的解决方案
Anyway, this was an extremely complicated
用来解决一个
and expensive solution
本来不存在的问题
to a problem that didn't exist.
而他们今天仍在这样做
And they're still at it today.
这是一款全新的标致208
This is a brand-new Peugeot 208.
出于某种原因,他们将方向盘安装在了
And for some reason, they've mounted the steering wheel
仪表板下方
under the dashboard,
这意味着如果你想把腿放在下面
which means it has to be the size of a shirt button
它只能做成衬衫纽扣那么大
if you're to get your legs under it.
为什么这样设计？
Why?
然后是我讨厌的雪铁龙2CV
[Jeremy] Then there's the Citroen 2CV, which I hate.
这辆车是世界上一切问题事件的预兆
This car is the harbinger of everything that's gone wrong in the world.
素食主义、骑自行车
Veganism, cycling,
自♥由♥民♥主♥主义 声称拥有“我的真理”的人
liberal democrats, people who talk about having "my truth."
“我的真理”根本不存在.真理是这东西太糟糕了
There's no such thing as "my truth". The truth is that it's awful.
这也不算糟糕
[James] It's not awful.
这是一辆非常实用且合理的汽车
It's a very practical, sensible car
几十年来经受住了时间的考验
that stood the test of time for decades.
它经历了战争的考验,它解放了法国农民,它很棒
It survived a war, it liberated the French peasantry, it's fantastic.
而且就如同图腾一般. 这是最法国的东西
And it's totemic. That's the most French thing.
如果你有一家餐馆, 或者你在拍电影或绘画时
If you have a themed restaurant, or you're doing a film, or painting,
想着：“我如何让这看起来很法式？”
you think, "How do I make this look French?"
在里面放一个2CV
Put a 2CV in it.
它的车窗不能摇下来.看,这很蠢
It doesn't have wind-down windows. Look, it's stupid.
飞机才会配这种窗户
Airplanes have these windows.
这是… -什么飞机？
It's a... -What airplane?
我从来没有坐过…我的飞机上有一扇完全一样的
I've never been on one... -My airplane's got one exactly like that.
这是一辆很棒的车.它的一切都是为用途而设计的没有冗余
This is a fantastic car. Everything in it is fit for purpose and no more.
我讨厌“为用途而设计”这个词组
I hate the expression "fit for purpose."
但它就是如此 -你们好
But it is. -[Jeremy] Hello.
赫利卡在哪里？ -不言而喻
Where's the Hélica? -It's evidence.
我们不要因此而低迷.我没有
Let's not get bogged down with that. -I'm not.
我们不会
We won't.
因为就连我也承认2CV确实有非常精妙的悬挂
Because even I will admit the 2CV does have very clever suspension.