大世界之旅（2016）

limited to seven miles an hour by global warming.
如今因为气候变暖被困在11km/h的时速
Is your boat... How can I put this?
你的船... 我该怎么说好呢?
...having a dump?
...拉稀了吗?
Is that mud?
我的船甩泥了是吗?
Yes, that's mud. You're grounding out.
是啊 那是泥 你在刨地啊
I'm basically using a boat in a field.
我基本上是在泥地上驾船啊
This did not happen in Miami Vice.
'迈阿密风云'里可不会有这种场景
Shallowness wasn't the only problem.
水浅并不是唯一的问题
We also had to deal with an underwater labyrinth of hidden fishing nets.
我们同时还要面对由隐藏的渔网构成的水下迷宫
It doesn't feel good.
感觉不妙啊
Doesn't sound good.
听起来也不太妙
Turning round.
调个头
Oh, he's done... What's he done, 100 yards?
哦 他才刚开了... 多少? 90米?
What the hell have you done? I don't know.
你都干了些什么啊? 我也不知道
Oh, you just...
哦 你刚刚...
Hammond?
哈蒙德?
What? Everybody stop crashing into me!
干嘛? 都别再撞我了好吧!
Are you stuck?
你是卡住了吗?
No, I just thought I'd stop here!
没有 我只是想把船停在这
I've caught a net.
因为螺旋桨被渔网缠住了
Why don't you just go and cut it off?
你为什么不直接把渔网割断呢?
Why isn't this happening to you?
你怎么就没这种事呢?
What? Why aren't you catching your props in nets?
什么? 你们的螺旋桨怎么就不缠渔网呢?
I haven't got any props. It's a PBR!
我没有螺旋桨啊 我这是内河巡逻艇
It's a jet boat. I've got two jets.
喷气引擎的 两个呢
Really?
真的吗?
Right.
好吧
Leaving Hammond to clear his props...
把哈蒙德丢在后面清理螺旋桨...
There! That is the problem.
找到了! 这就是问题所在
...I sailed onwards with Rear Admiral Slow.
...我和海军上将龟速船长继续前进
James May's boat is the sort of thing
詹姆斯·梅的船 有点像那种
I can imagine they gave to Prince Charles
我能想象到 他们把这种船送给幼年的
when he was a boy to play with in the bath.
查尔斯王子在浴缸里当玩具玩
My boat, on the other hand, was designed for fighting.
然而 我的船 则是为了战斗而生的
See, when the American military realised in the mid-'60s
想当年 在60年代的时候 美国♥军♥方发现
that they needed some kind of fast patrol boat
军队为了应对东南亚地区浅浅的河道
for the shallow rivers of Southeast Asia,
需要一款快速巡逻艇
they went to Hatteras,
于是他们就找到了哈特雷斯
which was a very respectable boat builder in America and said,
哈特雷斯是一家非常优秀的美国造船公♥司♥ 军方说
"You know that pleasure craft you make,
"你们旗下的游艇产品
the 31-footer, plastic hull, Mum and Dad boat?
那种9.45米长 塑料船体 爸妈休闲用的游艇
Could you convert that, move the engines further forward,
你们能否把它改造一下 把引擎挪到前方
fit it with jets instead of propellers,
同时用喷气引擎替换掉螺旋桨
give it a range of 250 miles and a cruising speed of 25 knots?"
技术指标做到续航400公里 航速25节?"
Massive job, really massive.
这是一项工程量巨大的工程 巨大
And Hatteras had it ready in six days!
而哈特雷斯在6天内就完成了任务
Six days!
仅仅6天啊!
What they created was epic.
他们设计的这艘船可以说完美
But even so, I had to have this made because today,
但即便如此 我也只能临时制♥造♥出我的船 因为...
there are no working PBRs left.
如今已经没有正常工作的内河巡逻艇存世了
And I find that extraordinary.
我觉得这件事情就很奇怪
They've saved all the other memorabilia from the Vietnam War -
他们留下了在越战中的其他纪念品
Hueys and guns and fighter planes and so on,
比如休伊直升机 枪♥支♥ 还有战斗机等等
but nobody thought to say, "Let's save a PBR."
但是没人想到 "我们留下一艘内河巡逻艇吧"
It's a brilliant bit of design, it really genuinely is.
它的设计真的是巧夺天工 真的
Original PBRs had two Detroit diesel engines,
原版的内河巡逻艇 有两台底特律柴油发动机
no electrics, better with water.
没有电气设备 更适合在水中使用
And jets made by...
而喷漆引擎是由...
Jacuzzi.
极可意制♥造♥的
I kid you not, they were Jacuzzi jets.
我没有在开玩笑 真的是极可意制♥造♥的
Yes, the jets make it very difficult to steer at slow speed.
的确 这些推进器在低速时非常难操控
But apart from that, I was able to cross Cambodia's giant paddling pool
但是除此之外 我能穿过柬埔寨的巨大的浅水池
without any issues.
而不受到任何阻碍
Oh, that's not good.
哦 这看起来不妙
Things, however, were rather different for my colleagues.
然而 对我的同事来说 事情就没有那么顺利了
James had snagged a net too.
船长也被一张渔网挂住了
Yeah!
好的!
Take that, you bastard.
吃我这招 你这破渔网
And as Aquaman struggled to get back on board...
当海王挣扎着回到船上的时候
Bollocks!
我去!
...the cooling system on Hammond's pointy Scarab filled with mud.
鼹鼠的尖头圣甲虫上的散热系统都被泥塞住了
This is a lot worse than...
这可比渔网缠在螺旋桨上
nets round the props.
要糟糕得多
And just after James had dried off...
正当船长快干透了的时候
he was back under his boat again,
他又下水去到船的底部去了
because his intakes had also filled up with sludge.
因为他的船的进气口也被淤泥堵住了
This meant I had to go back and become a tow truck.
这意味着我必须回去 当一回拖车
Ready for the dead stop? You'll like this.
准备好了吗 你会喜欢我马上要做的事情的
Shit.
干
Sorry.
抱歉
Clarkson.
克拉克森
Right, I've got you.
好 我抓住你了
James insisted on taking charge of tying the boats together.
船长执意要来负责把两艘船绑在一起
Which meant I was free to film some scenery.
意味着我就有空来拍摄"风景"
But eventually we were tethered,
但最终我们的船被缠在了一起
and set off in search of Hammond.
然后就出发 找鼹鼠去了
There he is! Yep.
鼹鼠就在那里 对
Hammond ahoy!
哈蒙德
I (BLEEP) hate boats!
我特么恨死船了!
Turning on the horn.
把喇叭开起来
International Crap Rescue is coming.
最垃圾的国际救援来了
I wonder how many low-grade pornographical movies
我琢磨 在这艘鼹鼠的船上
have been made on Hammond's boat.
得是拍了多少部小成本的小♥电♥影♥
Hey, you wanna come out rootin' and tootin'?
"嘿 想来不想来共度美好时光"
Hammond, how much semen have you found on that boat?
哈蒙德 你在你的船上发现了多少某种男性体液
Please, I've tried to block the thought from my mind. Every...
拜托 我时时刻刻都让自己不要去想这件事情
Honestly, going below is like climbing into a teenager's sock.
讲真 下面惨不忍♥睹 就像是进到了青少年的臭袜子里面一样
With both broken boats hitched up to Thunderbird 2,
终于把两艘破船接到了 雷鸟二号♥ 上
we trundled on, until eventually we were swamped by the night.
我们继续向前开 直到夜幕吞噬了我们
Have you got, like, a military searchlight on your boat?
你的船上有那种军用探照灯吗
Yes, I have.
我还真有
Hello!
怎么样
Many hours later, having covered only ten miles,
数小时后 只航行了十英里不到
we were feeling a bit unhappy.
我们都有些沮丧
But then...
但是随即
James, are they lights?
船长 那些是灯光吗
Oh, yeah.
哦 是的
I think that is the town of Pursat.
我觉得那就是菩萨镇
It's not completely the bottom of the lake,
虽然这里并不完全是湖的尽头
but we should be able to find a hotel there.
但是我们应该能在那里找到一家旅馆
Having parked up...
把船停了下来
Shit!
干
...we checked into the town's only guesthouse
我们入住了镇上的唯一一家客栈
and then, absolutely famished, sat down for dinner.
然后 三个饿扁了人 开始坐下吃晚饭
Sadly, though, there wasn't much on the menu for Hammond.
遗憾的是 哈蒙德好像没有在菜单上看到他想点的东西
So this is... Well, these are dragonflies.
这个嘛 蜻蜓
Don't eat dragonflies.
我不吃蜻蜓
You've never tried one? Nobody eats dragonflies.
你没吃过蜻蜓 没人该吃蜻蜓好吗
This is...crickets.
这是蟋蟀
These are water beetles.
这些是水甲虫
I don't eat water beetles. They're tarantulas.
我不吃水甲虫 那些是鸟蛛
I especially don't eat tarantulas.
我肯定更不会吃鸟蛛
Or big spiders, anyway.
或者是其他类型的大蜘蛛
The thing is... during the time of Pol Pot,
是这样的 在波尔布特统治期间
they were starving and they had to.
人们非常饥饿 只能吃这个
And they actually discovered that they're lovely.
然后人们发现这些 其实还挺好吃的
Do you know what Pol Pot means?
你知道Pol Pot是什么意思吗
Everyone thinks it's his name. Bad menu?
所有人都以为是一个名字 差劲的菜单的意思吗
It stands for Political Potential.
其实是政♥治♥潜力的意思
Same as Jeremy Corbyn. Same policies.
和科尔宾一样 政策也一样