大世界之旅（2016）

"Most glorious and upright person of genius."
“集魅力和正直于一身的天才智者”
I want to be called... In fact, I want--
我也想…其实我也想被叫
Most glorious and upright person of genius.
“集魅力和正直于一身的天才智者
I want you two to start calling me that.
我想要你们俩从今天起这么称呼我
After a bit more conversation, we went to bed.
我们又接着闲聊一会儿 然后回房♥间休息
Well, one of us did.
准确地讲 我们其中一个人回去休息了
I've got paint, paint brushes,
我买♥♥了油漆 刷子
and then I've got spray paint.
还有颜料喷罐
Where's the bicycles?
咱的自行车呢
Oh, they're here. Thank you.
哦 在这呢 谢谢
Thank you so much. Thank you very much.
谢谢你们 十分感谢
I love to follow you.
我还是跟着你走吧
The next morning, I fitted my new lavatory seat and air-conditioning unit.
第二天早上 我给我的车装上了马桶座圈和空调
James installed his drinks fridge.
船长给他的船装了一个小冰箱
And after Hammond had slipped into his new shirt...
而鼹鼠换了件新衬衫之后
we set off.
我们出发了
And immediately, it was hard to keep a straight face.
几乎立刻 我就很难憋住不笑
We have played jokes on one another before,
我们原来也经常拿对方的车开玩笑
but I'm not sure we've ever pulled one as good as this.
但我们不确定我们有干出过这么完美的恶作剧
From where Richard Hammond is standing,
站在哈蒙德那个角度
he has no idea what James and I have done.
他完全不知道我和梅对他的船做了什么
Hey, guys?
嘿 兄弟们
This is the first time we've run under our own steam as a three.
这是我们三个人第一次全靠自己船的动力并排航行
Yeah, it feels good.
是啊 看着很爽
I'm not sure it feels that good, though, does it?
我觉得应该还可以更爽吧 不是吗
Do you know what might feel better?
你知道干什么可以更爽一点吗?
Thank you.
我可谢谢你们吧
Very funny.
真好玩
We were now 150 miles into our journey and leaving the Tonlé Sap
我们现在已经航行了240公里 离开了洞里萨河
to join the world's most iconic river -
并入了世界上最著名的河流之一
the mighty Mekong.
雄壮的湄公河
And I was going down it at full chat in a jet boat.
我在湄公河里开着喷气式快艇全速前进
These jets, they're New Zealand jets, and they are epic.
这些产自新西兰的喷漆引擎实在是爽
The jet skis you rent on holiday,
你度假时租到的小摩托艇
they have one impeller in a tube,
他们有一个装着推进扇的涵道
suck water in, shoot it out the back and go along.
从前面吸水 从尾喷口喷射出来 产生推力
The jets in this are a bit different.
这台的发动机原理有点不同
They're two-stage impellers.
他用的是两段式推进器
One sucks the water in and gets it spinning,
第一部分将水吸进去 让水旋转起来
fires it into the second one that properly hammers it out the back.
后面的则负责把水从尾喷口♥射♥出来
Instant acceleration, and a lot of it.
瞬间加速 动力迅猛
Speed boating.
飙快艇
There really was one of these in Miami Vice.
迈阿密风云 里真的有这样一艘快艇
Don Johnson drove around in it with his sleeves rolled up, looking cool.
唐·约翰逊开着这船 卷着袖子 四处招摇
And, in fact, this is a Scarab Thunder,
而这其实是一台圣甲虫雷霆
and it was built specially for a television series
它专为电视连续剧 天堂的雷霆
called Thunder starring Hulk Hogan.
而打造的 主演是霍克·霍肯
It lasted one season.
剧集只播出了一季
It was crap.
是个烂剧
But the boat exists.
但这艘船却留了下来
Another funny thing about boats.
关于船 另一件有趣的事情是
When you have a car, you never, ever run it at max revs all day.
如果你在开车 你永远不会拉着最高转速开一整天
But with boats, that's what you do.
但船却必须要这么开
Have you ever driven a car where you've just...
你有没有尝试过
maxed it from the moment you start in the morning
开车一出门就用最高转速
and left it maxed all day?
然后一直这样开一整天
Yeah, I had a company Renault Clio for a while
有啊 我开过一辆公♥司♥配车雷诺Clio
and that's how I drove it.
我就一直这么开的
Meanwhile, a long way further back,
与此同时 在他们俩后面很远很远的地方
I was contemplating the enormity of this incredible river.
我在感受这条河流是如何的富足
Here's a stat for you.
告诉你这样一组数据
The volume of fish caught in the Mekong
湄公河里捕鱼的数量
is 13 times greater than the volume of fish
比全美内陆捕鱼的数量
caught in all of America's inland waterways combined.
高出了整整13倍
60 million people depend on the Mekong for food or their livelihood.
有6000万人靠着湄公河的物产养活自己
60 million people.
六千万人啊
So messing this up with things like damming
所以用筑坝等方式改变水系的影响
外♥交♥部♥发言人耿爽在北♥京♥予以回应时称 有关言论毫无根据 别有用心
*这是美国国♥务♥院♥官员指责中国时的标准说法 2018年8月3日
could be as bad as nuclear war.
不亚于发动一场核战
中国已连续15年向有关国家提供澜沧江汛期水文数据
*一直致力于与相关国家开展水文信息共享 防洪抗旱等方面的水资源合作
Up ahead, Jeremy and I were trying to create
而在前方的杰瑞米和我
a professional impression at the Vietnamese border checkpoint.
正在试图给越南边检留下"我们很专业"的印象
Oh, that hasn't worked.
哦 这不太行得通
Yeah.
是呀
Hi. Thank you.
你好 谢谢你
We're experienced travellers passing through.
我们都是很有经验的老船长
Yeah, we were born in boats, really.
我们几乎就是生在船上的
Hammond, I'm really sorry, but the customs man's dog has died.
哈蒙德 我很抱歉 不过边检海关的狗似乎死了
Oh, no. Oh, what a terrible time to arrive.
哦 不 我们来的时候真是太不好了
I'm not sure he's gonna be very happy.
我不确定他今天会有个好心情
Hello.
你好
I'm beginning to suspect there may be man-made fibres
我开始怀疑我这件衬衫里
involved in this shirt of mine.
有不少化纤成分
It's uncomfortable.
这衣服很不舒服
With the paperwork done,
办完手续之后
I observed nautical courtesy with the flags,
我用旗子展示了航行礼节
donned a PBR-crew black beret...
戴上巡逻艇船员的黑贝雷帽
Right.
好了
...and roared into the Nam.
然后向着越南进发
Suddenly, the PBR is feeling alive and sprightly.
突然间 PBR变得精神饱满 充满活力
This is what it was built to do,
这船生来就该在这里
hammer down the Mekong River in Vietnam.
在越南沿着湄公河耀武扬威
Cambodia, Mekong River virtually empty.
柬埔寨境内的湄公河上空荡荡的
In Vietnam now, Mekong River very full of commerce.
而到了越南这边 河面上尽是往来商船
I, too, was in Vietnam at this point,
而此时 我也通过边境进入越南
and something was dawning on me.
我逐渐意识到
Strikes me I'm being a bit of a mug because I'm thrashing this boat,
我觉得之前努力开快船这件事有点蠢
but it only does 23 km/h, about 11.5 knots,
毕竟这船只能开23公里每小时 大概11.5节
and I'm trying to catch up with people I don't even want to be with anyway.
而我在试图追两个我反正也不想跟他们在一起的人
So, I decided to ease off and break out my new fishing rod.
所以 我打算放慢节奏尝试一下我新买♥♥的钓鱼竿
That is working a treat. I should really have a spinner on
看起来不错 我确实该准备个鱼饵之类的东西
or something like that, but...
不过 无所谓了
Yeah, that's fishing.
对 这就是钓鱼
In the most densely fish-populated
在世界上鱼群最密集
fishing place in the world.
的渔场中钓鱼
After a few miles, I turned off the Mekong
几公里之后 我转出了湄公河
and asked Hammond to follow me to the town of Chau Doc.
并让哈蒙德跟我来到一个叫朱笃镇的小城
And this time, when we arrived under the watchful gaze of yet more officials,
而这一次 在更多码头工作人员的注视下
we were determined to park well.
我们绝对要把船停得漂亮
Jeremy? You've now got my boat and I'm not on it!
杰瑞米 你把我的船拖走了 而我不在船上
What?
啥?
I'm not on it and it's no longer tied on!
我不在船上 系的缆绳已经松了啊
It's not tied on on that end? No, it's come off!
另一边没有绑好? 没有 绳子松了
Why didn't you tie it on? I thought I had!
你为啥不绑紧啊 我以为我绑好了
Oh, for God's sake. Your boat's got free, Hammond.
我的天啊 哈蒙德 你的船要跑掉了
I quickly picked up Richard so he could re-acquire his boat.
我赶快接上鼹鼠 载着他去救他的船
OK, that's that test concluded,
好了接下来进行测试
"Where would it go?" test. It went to there.
"水往什么方向流的"测试 结论是那边
Yeah, exactly. So we now know--
对 没错 所以我们现在知道了…
That's the drift, we've established the drift, it goes that way.
这是水流的方向 我们确定了水流
Everything we need to know.
知道了所有我们需要的信息
Finally, we managed to tie ourselves to some land.
终于 我们成功的把船停靠在了岸边
And that is how we do that.
船 就该这么系
And it was at this point Hammond got the joke.
现如今 哈蒙德终于看到了我们的恶作剧
I've just seen it! What?
我才注意到 注意到什么
What you've done to my boat.
注意到你都对我的船干了啥
Have I been... Yes, all day.
我是不是… 是的 一整天
How have I not seen that? You haven't seen it all day.
我怎么一整天都没看见 是的你一整天都没看到
You've been through Cambodian customs, Vietnamese immigration,
你经过了柬埔寨海关 越南移♥民♥局
Vietnamese customs. Oh, my God!
越南海关 哦我的天哪