外星也难民

Solar Opposites S04E05

Part 2 Sept. 18, 2023, 3:32 p.m.

不你听起来蠢透了
No, you sound stupid.
这是个失乐普单词完全不一样的
It's a Shlorpian word that's totally different.
生日失乐普圣日
Birth-a-day, Shlorpian birth-a-day.
见鬼
Jesus. Fuck.
噢天呐
Oh, my God,
这些复♥制♥人对他们的传统真的是一无所知
these replicants know nothing about their heritage.
每一个失乐普人会在生命中
Every Shlorpian gets one birth-a-day randomly
随机获得一个圣日
in their lifetime.
当一件发光绿色礼物出现的时候
You know when it's here
你就知道这一天来临了
because a glowing green present appears.
然后你有一天的时间去打开它
And then you have exactly one day to open your present
然后获得你的圣日超能力
and claim your birth-a-day powers.
噢可以获得了什么样的超能力呢
Ooh, what kind of powers do you get?
那是个问题
That's the problem.
你可以选无尽的智慧
You're given a choice between infinite wisdom
或者无尽的破坏力
or powers of infinite destruction.
无尽智慧听起来好棒
Infinite wisdom sounds toit!
也许吧谁知道呢反正没人选这个
Maybe, no one knows, it's never been picked.
大家都选破坏力
Everyone chooses destruction.
圣日是失乐普人
A Shlorpian's birth-a-day is their big chance
申冤报复的最好时机
to get revenge on everyone who's wronged them.
说到失乐普星我们有一个朋友
Back on Shlorp, we had this one friend
叫杰森
by the name of Jason.
快跑今天是杰森的圣日
Run, it's Jason's birth-a-day!
我讨厌在这里工作
I fuckin' hated working here!
你想往哪逃啊
Where the fuck you goin', dude?
你这个该死的老板
You were a shitty boss.
祝我圣日快乐
Happy birth-a-day to me!
杰森平时挺冷静大家都挺尊重他的
And Jason was a chill dude. People treated him with respect.
完了洋洋乐可不是个冷静的人
Ah, geez. Yumyulack isn't chill,
我们最近跟他开的玩笑也挺不尊重他
and we've really disrespected him lately with all the ball busting.
尤其是你科沃
Especially you, Korvo.
我看见他埋在帽子里痛哭了
I saw him crying into his bucket hat.
我讨厌别人可以批评我
I hate it when people can dish it out
他们自己却受不了批评
but they can't take it.
他绝对会用圣日超能力
He'll most def use his birth-a-day powers
用激光眼把我们蒸发掉
to laser-eye vaporize us.
我不想化成灰
I don't wanna be zapped into ash.
我还没舔过男生屁屁呢
I haven't even licked a boy's inner butt yet.
我们得做以前在失乐普星做的事
We gotta do what we used to do back on Shlorp.
不让这个小孩发现
Keep the birth-a-day boy from finding out
今天是他的圣日
it's their birth-a-day.
我们要不惜一切代价让洋洋乐离开房♥间
We must keep Yumyulack away from his room at all costs.
对我从来没在我的圣日上杀过人
That's right. I never got to kill anyone on my birth-a-day
因为我朋友一直分散我注意力直到那天结束
because my friends distracted me until the clock ran out.
我本来打算杀光前任
I was gonna kill my exes
这样她们彼此就不会交流
so they couldn't talk to each other
我之前吹嘘我会给他们口的事
about how I always brag about sucking da mound
但其实我并没有
but I never actually do it.
我们这样计划
Then that's the plan.
在这十二个小时里
We have 12 hours to
我们要分散洋洋乐注意力挽救整个家庭
distract Yumyulack and save the family.
圣日结束倒计时
然后我们就成功了
Then we suck da mound.
好了这是最后一盆绿植了
Alright. That's the last of my ferns.
我是不会让我的花♥园♥成为遗迹的
I'm not letting my Bloomscapes die
就因为你们连一周一次的表面清洁都做不到
'cause y'all can't do a weekly surface clean.
你动我的超棒绞盘干什么
What are you doing with my good winches?
是关于那个快递员吗
This is about the UPS guy.
你这是步他后尘
You're going after his ass.
快递员快递员
UPS, UPS!
该死的蛹宝宝你怎么这么道德感爆棚
Dammit, Pupa. Why do you have to have a moral code?
你不能进去太危险了
You can't go in there, it's too big a risk.
你都不知道他值不值得救
You don't even know if he's worth saving.
如果他支持乔丹·彼得森呢
What if he likes defending Jordan Peterson in comment threads?
注:加拿大心理学教授又称"龙虾教授"
所持许多观点都有极大争议
我是不会让你进去的
I'm not lettin' you go in there.
回来还敢给我跑酷
Get back here, don't you parkour away from me!
蛹宝宝
Pupa!
我们最喜欢的小外星人来了
There's our favorite little alien.
空手道馆
你们在这干嘛
Uh, hey, what are you guys doing here?
你说练武术是那些脚控才学的
You said martial arts was for toe suckers.
脚控就是最牛的兄弟
Toe sucking rules, dude!
空手道排练的怎么样
How was karate rehearsal?
棒极了我今天拿到白带四段
Awesome, I got my fourth white belt today.
看看我的新动作
Check out my sick new move.
天你的平衡感还不如一头蠢驴...
Jesus, you are more off-balance than a donkey fucking...
你也太棒了吧
That was great.
咱们得出去庆祝
We thought we'd take you out to celebrate
你拿到这个
this white belt thing we just heard about.
主意不错但我还是想回家
I appreciate the thought, but I prefer to head home
这样我就可以玩新版麦登疯狂橄榄球了
so I can play the new Madden in my room.
忘掉那个大受欢迎的狂野夏洛特游戏吧
Forget the massively popular, Good Charlotte-themed video game.
注:狂野夏洛特美国流行摇滚乐队
你什么时候都能玩
You could do that anytime,
但庆祝白带四段的机会只有一次
but you only get one chance to celebrate your fourth white belt.
咱们能至少出去吃顿午饭吗
Can we at least take you out to lunch?
我知道一个超棒的餐厅
I know the perfect place!
好吧我确实饿了
Okay, I did work up a pretty good appetite
让我深深地鞠一躬
with all my respectful bowing.
看吧
Check it out.
太酷了
Very cool.
危险辐射强度达百分之三十五
Danger, radiation level at 35 percent.
你听到那个恐怖的警告了
You heard that scary-ass voice.
如果你非得要救他那就赶快
If you gonna do this rescue bullshit, then hurry up,
要不然你就回不来了
or you won't have time to get back.
顺便说一句你要去的舱
By the way, that compartment you're in now
是一座走不出去的巨大迷宫
is a giant unsolvable maze.
每艘飞船都有别用那种奇怪的眼神看着我
Every ship's got one, stop looking at me like it's weird.
救命
Help!
快救救我
Please, help!
该死的蛹宝宝你还真能走出迷宫啊
Damn, Pupa! Your Daredevil powers fucked that maze up.
谢谢你善良的生物
Thank you, kind creature.
等等这不是快递员
Wait, that ain't the UPS guy.
兄弟你进我们飞船干什么
Bro, how the hell did you get onto my ship?
我是灭虫员
I'm an exterminator.
几周前我被叫来灭蜘蛛
Got hired to come here a couple weeks ago to spray for spiders,
有个巨大的长角怪虫撞到了我的腿
and some giant horned bug gored my leg.
该死的他说的是沃塔虫
Oh, shit. He's talking about a volptar.
沃塔虫
对对就是这个
Yeah, yeah, that's it.
它是一种危险的硅基寄生虫
It's a dangerous silica-based parasite
它一定是在我们飞越宇宙的时候钻进来了
that must have crawled into the ship when we were flying through space.
辐射都弄不死它
Volptars can survive radiation.
它们巨顽强
They're tough as shit!
谢谢你
Thank you!
好了他上来了
Okay, he's back.
用第二个钩子把你自己也钓上来吧
Now use the second hook for yourself.
蛹宝宝回来
Pupa, get back here!
该死的我真受不了我这个球体身形
Dammit, I'm getting too orb for this shit.
这是镇上唯一一家
This is the only restaurant on this side of town
可以自己烤肉的餐厅
where you can smoke your own brisket at the table
《好汉两个半》的演员都在这做服务员
and see the kid from Two and a Half Men tending bar.
我就是想有个镜头我发誓
Ah, I'm just doing this for a role, I swear.
这家餐厅全是五星好评
This place has a ton of five-star reviews.
只有一个人给了零星
And one zero-star review from a guy
还是抱怨他离婚了
who clearly just wanted to complain about his divorce.
闻起来真香
Oh, it smells amazing.
我们什么时候能吃
When do we eat?
只需短短四个小时
In four short hours,
就可以给肉测第一次温了
we get to take the meat's temperature for the first time.