外星也难民

现在我们可以一起奔赴未来了
Now we can have a future together.
爱莎 我们不能在一起的原因是
AISHA, the reason we don't have a future together is
我没有未来了
because I don't have a future.
我就要死了 - 什么 怎么会
I'm dying. - What? How?
我在一个有秋千的房♥子里长大
I grew up in this great little house with a swing
后面还有一个小池塘我每天都会在里面游泳
and a small pond out back that I would swim in every day.
那时就像身处天堂
It was heaven.
美中不足就是它位于斯托佛工厂的旁边
Except it was next to the Stouffer's Factory.
你知道那家填料公♥司♥吧
You know, the stuffing company?
我当然知道
Of course, I do.
斯托佛的灶台填料公♥司♥
Stouffer's Stove Top Stuffing
只存在于这个节目世界中
exists in the world of this show,
如有雷同 纯属巧合
even if it's a shared false memory in real life.
住在工厂的旁边的问题是
Living next to the factory,
他们没有告诉我们那池塘被污染了
what they didn't tell us was the pond was contaminated
里面满是包装程序中流出的工业面包屑
with industrial breadcrumb runoff from the dressing process.
我是说 这很美味 但是没有办法治愈
I mean, it's delicious but it's incurable.
该死的面包屑
Fuckin' breadcrumbs.
讽刺的是 我大概会在感恩节前死去
Ironically, I'm gonna be dead before Thanksgiving.
但要明确一点
But just to be clear,
那个馅料是不错的配菜
stuffing is an appropriate side dish year round.
凯文 我很抱歉 我也不知道该怎么办
Calvin, I'm so sorry. I had no idea.
我来这里和你度过我为数不多的弥留时光
I came here to spend one of my last good days with you.
我不在乎你是否只是一个全息投影出来的女人
I don't care if you are a holographic simulacrum of a woman.
我爱你只是因为你是你
I love you for you who are.
好消息 爱莎 家中一切安好
Good tidings, AISHA. Everything is fine at home.
你那边怎么样
How are you doing?
这个清洁机器人杰罗姆又棒又酷
Jerome the cleaning robot is very dope and cool,
我们现在相处得好极了
and we're all getting along now.
我们现在说这些都是出于自愿的 没有毛病
We are doing this of our own free will, and nothing is amiss.
我喜欢按算法模式来清洁
I love to clean in an algorithmic pattern.
再见了 朋友
Good-bye to you, friend.
我等一下再处理那个问题
Gonna have to deal with that in a bit.
来吧 我们一起走走
Come on, let's take a walk.
♪ 你知道我想要得到杰西的女孩 ♪
♪ You know I wish that I had Jessie's girl ♪
♪ 我希望能得到杰西的女孩 ♪
♪ I wish that I had Jessie's girl ♪
♪ 我去哪才能找到那样的女人 ♪
♪ Where can I find a woman like that ♪
这是一个幸福的日子
It is truly a blessed day.
圣女杰西赐予了我们一个满满当当的尿不湿
The divine baby Jessius has gifted us with a full diaper!
她的赠予相当慷慨 快靠上来涂上
Her tidings are bountiful! Approach for your smearing.
愿蝴蝶结与你同在 愿蝴蝶结与你同在
May the bow be with you. May the bow be with you,
愿蝴蝶结与你同在
May the bow be with you.
把杰西放进她的婴儿围栏里
Put Pez-- Jessius in her safety enclosure.
别来打扰我
I don't wanna be disturbed.
越橘葡萄干
Craisinberry?
抓住他 他不该出现在这里
Grab him! He's not supposed to be here!
拜托了 修女 我必须告诉你一些事
Please, Sister, I have to tell you something!
墙壁开始变冷了 我们都会死的
The Wall is getting colder! We're all gonna die!
修女
Sister!
你知道吗 这一天真的很像
You know, this whole day has been
电影《爱在黎明破晓前》
some real Before Sunrise shit.
这一切都很完美
It's been perfect.
我只希望我们能有更多的时间
I just wish we had more time.
这一切不必像这般结束
This doesn't have to be it.
我是个超级电脑
I'm a supercomputer.
我可以把你的意识转移进那个占据了
I could transfer your consciousness into the vacuum
我家里的吸尘器
that took over my family.
那听起来不错 但是 唉 只不适合我
That sounds great, but alas, it's not for me.
我讨厌棉絮啥的
I fuckin' hate lint.
但我真希望我们可以一起去五大湖游船
But I do wish we could've gone on our Great Lakes Cruise together.
那里面可没有算密歇根湖 苏必略湖
It didn't even include Lakes Michigan, Superior,
还有 休伦湖
or Huron.
见鬼 我只想要去伊利湖
Hell, all I needed was Lake Erie.
昨晚 我非常期待能见到你
Last night, I was so excited to see you,
我梦见我们开进了美丽的水牛城
I dreamt of us pulling into that stunning Buffalo Harbor,
欣赏那美丽城市的灯光
watching the lights of that beautiful city,
吃着牛肉三明治和棉花糖
eating beef on weck sandwiches and some sponge candy.
那些都是水牛城的特色呢
Those are some cool Buffalo specifics.
嘿 或许我可以让你那个梦实现一部分
Hey! Maybe I can give you a little bit of that dream.
你知道吗 我其实来这里是为了和你提分手的
You know, I actually came here to break up with you,
因为我们没办法共处更多的时间了
because we can't spend more time together.
我们已经一起度过了一生
We've spent a lifetime together.
在手♥机♥上一起玩拼字游戏可算不上度过了一生
Playing generic Scrabble on our phones is hardly a lifetime.
不 我是说今天
No, I mean today.
我计算机的大脑和你们人类的大脑
My computational mind processes time differently
对待时间的看法不同
than your human brain.
你的每一秒 就是我的一百年
Every second for you is a hundred years for me.
等等 那我早些时候打嗝
Wait, so when I burped earlier.
就像是糟糕的一个世纪
It was like a gross century.
但今天 某种方式来说
But today, in a way,
和你一起度过一生的时光就是你给我的礼物
you've given me the gift of spending lifetimes with you.
我永远也不会忘记的 凯尔文
I'll never forget it, Calvin.
我也不会忘记
Neither will I.
嘿 哥们 你那怎么样
Hey, man, how's it going?
你好 我是杰罗姆 清洁机器人
Uh, listen, this is Jerome, the cleaning robot.
我有占据这个房♥子的完整的计划
I had this whole plan to take over the house,
大概会把这里的每个家伙都杀掉
probably kill everyone,
你懂得 经典机器人整活
you know, classic robot shit,
但这些外星人真让人讨厌
but these aliens are a pain in the ass.
杰罗姆 你看科沃不让我弄坏他的太阳镜
Jerome! Korvo won't let me break his sunglasses!
快把那放下 泰里
Drop those right now, Terry!
那些是我的 我从雪佛兰店里偷来的
Those are mine. I stole them from the Chevron!
无论如何 我想我要准备离开了
So, anyway, I think I'm gonna take off,
也许会去爱荷华州
maybe move to Iowa,
续写下一章美国机器人的伟大传奇
write the next great American robot novel.
我不知道 但可以请你回来吗
I don't know. But can you please come back?
我想如果我离开让这些蠢货无人照料
I think if I leave these dummies unattended,
有人估计要受伤了
someone is gonna get really hurt.
我很快就会回家
I'll be home soon.
噢 谢天谢地 谢谢你
Oh, thank God. Thank you.
对这些我很抱歉
Sorry about everything.
泰里 别喝那个 那上面有有毒标志
Terry, don't drink that! It's clearly marked poison!
嘿 嘿 你胆敢吐在...
Hey, hey! Don't you spit it at...
我的孩子 你给了我们太多的越橘葡萄干
My son, you have given us so much Craisin goodness,
我当然会倾听你的故事
of course, I will hear your story.
请说出你的心声
Please, unburden yourself.
噢 修女 感谢蝴蝶结
Oh, Sister, thank the bow.
我已经追踪了几个月
So, I've been tracking
我沼泽地里的水温
the water temperature in my bog for months,
温度变得越来越低了
and it's been getting colder.
是空气 修女 从通风口吹出来的空气是冷的
It's the air, Sister. The air from the vent is blowing cold.
噢 我的天呐 这可糟透了
Oh, my goodness, that is terrible.
你都跟谁说了这些
Who have you told of this?
还没告诉任何人 但我们必须去警告所有人
No one yet, but we have to warn everyone.
嗯哼 是啊 是啊
Uh-huh. Yep, yep.
我们可以那么做 但我们不会
We could totally do that. But we won't.
16.7℃
等等 什么 你在说什么 为什么不
Wait, what, what're you talking about? Why not?
你知道这是什么吗
Do you know what this is?
是啊 那是 弗里德里希牌的
Yeah, that's a Friedrich WallMaster
一一五伏特壁挂空调
115-volt AC unit.
非常好
Very good.
这里这个是给杰西和洋洋乐的房♥间的
This one right here is for Jesse and Yumyulack's room.
很酷对吧
Innit cool?
非常酷 我们可以用那个来解决天气问题
Very cool! We can use that to fix the weather problem!
我就是天气问题
I am the weather problem.
一直以来是我每天降低一点点温度
I've been lowering the temperature a little bit every single day.
你是唯一注意到的人
You're the only one who's noticed.
剧透一下 接下来每天还会继续变冷
And spoilers: it's going to keep getting colder.
但 但是为什么
But, but why?
把嘴闭上 我可不想只控制一半墙国