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这是我吃过的最美味的意大利面。
This is the most delicious pasta I have ever had.
这是谁做的?
Who made this?
你做的。
You did.
什么?啥时候?
What? When?
小丑男,你是全意大利第二号♥意面制♥作♥者
Il buffone, you are the second greatest pasta maker in all of Italy.
我是意面制♥作♥者?
I am the pasta maker?
妈妈,我或许是在监狱里出生的,
Mama, I may have been born in a prison,
但我一直生活在自己制♥造♥的监狱里,
but I have been living in a prison of my own making,
监狱长就是我的自我怀疑。
the warden, my self-doubt.
我已经成为我寻求的东西了!
I have become the thing that I sought!
谢谢你,妈妈。
Thank you, Mama.
看看这双爪爪?
Will you look at these mitts?
我要怎么开车回家?
How am I gonna to drive home?
哦,该死!
Oh, fuck!
我的保姆现在肯定加了三倍的班。
My babysitter must be in triple overtime by now.
我跟你说过多少次了不要在我面前提孩子?
How many times have I asked you not to mention children in my presence?
别搞你的女性丑态了!
Enough with your female antics!
是时候……升升温了。
It's time to... turn up the heat.
他说得像个双关语,但他真的这么做了。
He said it like a pun, but that's what he literally did.
真尴尬!
How embarrassing!
我不是在说双关语。
And I didn't mean it as a pun.
这话含意猥亵,说起来!但这无关紧要
It's a double entendre, if anything! But that's irrelevant
因为我指的是释放毒气。
because I meant the turn on the poison vapor.
毒气在哪里?
Where the fuck is the poison vapor?
不,没在我车里。
No, it's not in my car.
我以为在你车里。
I thought it was in your car.
总之,快去拿!
Well, go and get it!
嗷!我的腋窝都出汗了。
Ugh! My pits are gushing.
我会让你凉快,宝贝。
I'll cool you down, baby.
热是我最讨厌的敌人。
Heat is my most despised nemesis.
唔,爽。唔!
Ooh, yes. Ooh!
射我的手肘。
Do my elbows.
放我出去!
Get me out of here!
啊!来了。
Ah! There we go.
-你!堵上通风口。 -做不到。
- You! Cover that vent. - No can do.
太高了。
It's too high up.
你们为什么就不能长得高大点堵住毒气呢?
Why can't any of you just, like, get big and tall and be impervious to gas?
你至少能制♥造♥一个爆♥炸♥让我们离开这里吧?
Can you at least create an explosion to get us out of here?
我可以给你冲杯冰咖啡?
I can make you an iced coffee?
天啊!当你需要爆♥炸♥的时候那个爆♥炸♥家伙死哪去了?
God! Where's that 'splosions guy when you need a 'splosion?
你是说贝恩吗?
You mean Bane?
噢,现在我还得记住每个人的名字了?
Oh, now I'm supposed to learn everyone's names?
好吧。
Okay.
我回家的路上你能不能给我一块帕尔马干酪,妈妈?
Do you think you could part with a wedge of parm for my trip home, Mama?
回家?
Home?
是的,妈妈。
Si, Mama.
我要带着我在我们短暂但有意义的相处中
I now return to Gotham with all the secrets and wisdom I learned
学到的所有秘诀和智慧回到哥谭市。
in our short, but meaningful time together.
拜了个拜!
Hairy vaderchy!
-不行。 -啊?
- No. - Huh?
现在,你要接管我的生意并成为我的继承人。
Now, you will take over my business and be my heir.
但是妈妈,你解决了我的问题,
But Mama, you fixed my problems,
所以我不再需要你——
so I don't need you any--
婊♥子♥养♥的♥!你不能来到这个国家,
Madre di puttana! You cannot come to this country,
偷了我们的东西然后一走了之。
steal from us and then leave.
你是个文化观光客!现在要怎样?
You're a cultural tourist! What now?
你要把我的故事卖♥♥给流媒体服务的某个混♥蛋♥。
You're gonna sell my story to some asshole at a streaming service.
妈妈,理智点。
Mama, let's be reasonable.
你以为我会教你一门我花了毕生精力完善的技艺
You think I would teach you a craft I spent-a my whole life perfecting
而不求回报吗?
and expect nothing in return?
好吧,
Okay,
如果我们要在我的领导下死掉,
if we're gonna die under my leadership,
我们也要死得像他妈的超模一样!
we're gonna do it looking like fucking supermodels!
我把所有美发产品、减肥小吃都藏在这里,
This is where I stash all the hair products, diet snacks,
远有各大品牌送给艾薇的粉色小枪
and little pink guns that brands send to Ivy
以求她的支持。
hoping to get her endorsement.
这也是我关那个火山女的地方。
And it's also where I put that volcano girl.
噢,该死!
Oh, fuck!
噢,谢谢,维苏威火山!
Oh, thank, Mount Vesuvius!
你为什么把我关在这里?
Why'd you lock me in here?
我告诉过你这不是安全屋!
I told you it wasn't a panic room!
你还活着,不是吗?
You're alive, aren't you?
唔,防毒面具!
Ooh, gas masks!
唔,口香糖!
Ooh, gum!
这简直是哥谭最易燃的壁橱。
This is literally the most flammable closet in all of Gotham.
发胶,火♥药♥,
Hairspray, gunpowder,
用易燃成分制成的零食。
snacks made with highly-combustible ingredients.
算我运气好没爆♥炸♥!
I'm lucky I didn't explode!
爆♥炸♥,是说爆♥炸♥吗?
Explode, like an explosion?
-是的。 -嗯。
- Yes. - Hmm.
什么?不!
What? No!
你将为你的厚颜无♥耻♥付出死亡的代价。
You will pay the price for your insolence with death.
我们不能坐下来边喝开胃酒边谈吗?
Can't we sit and talk this out over an aperitivo?
妈妈!别伤害我的手指!
Mama! Not my fingers!
我需要这些来取悦诺拉……
I need these to pleasure Nora...
靠我的书法!
with my calligraphy!
还有继续在哥谭市做个小有名气的恶棍!
And to continue working as a semi-famous villain in Gotham!
等等。你算是半个名人?
Wait. You are semi-famous?
泥脸?你好。
Clayface? Hi.
这是……是我,贝恩。
It's... It's me, Bane.
不,贝恩。搞爆♥炸♥的那个?
No, Bane. From 'sploding things?
对!
Yes!
听着。我的前导师正拿刀顶着我,
So, look. My former mentor has me at knife point,
她要你拉斯维加斯演出的票。
and she's demanding tickets to your Vegas show.
-前排座。 -要前排座,她说。
- Front row. - Front row, she says.
嗯……
Um...
你要我在哥谭新闻直播上
You want me to head-butt Poison Ivy
用头撞艾薇,就为了让她出丑?
on the Gotham News live just to embarrass her?
但她是我的诺拉的老板……
But she's my Nora's boss...
成交。
You've got a deal.
太棒了,小丑男。
Bravo, Il Buffone.
啊!
Ugh!
-发胶! -喷漆枪!
- Hairspray! - Paint guns!
减肥点心!
Diet snacks!
我用这双大手能拿这么多东西。
I can carry so much stuff with these big hands.
看!我手持大约20瓶无糖汽水。
Look! I'm holdin' like 20 diet sodas.
给我照张相!
Someone take a pic!
不如把这个扔进去。
Might as well throw this in there.
我不知道怎么把它挂回墙上。
I don't know how to put it back on the wall.
哇,这就像《虎胆龙威》一样。
Wow, this is just like Die Hard.
噢,被过度引用的动作片
Oh, the over-referenced action movie
都被段子遗忘了?
that's been parodied into oblivion?
不过,今天不行!
Well, not today!
你可以直接请我啊!
You could have just asked me!
你个蛇蝎女人!
You, scorpion woman!
请看看这个。
Will you look at that.
卢瑟先生,哥谭市的一场爆♥炸♥扩大了大气层
Mr. Luthor, an explosion in Gotham imbigulated the atmosphere
向外推了304厘米……
and pushed it 304cm...
我是说,高了10英尺。
I mean, 10ft higher.
我们现在能再生臭氧层了。
We are now in range to regenerate the ozone.
那就发射,教授。
Smash that follow, Professor.
永别了,小贼!
Farewell, little thief boy!
我要回家找我亲爱的诺拉了。
I am going home to my dear Nora.
再见,厕所!
Ciao ciao, Toilet!
疯狂妈妈
贝恩
啊!真漂亮。
Ah! So bellissimo.
现在我用意大利人的艺术眼光看世界了。
I now see the world in the artistic way the Italians do.
我们成功了,同事们。
We did it, co-workers.
我们肯定都有脑震荡,
Pretty sure we all have concussions,
但我睡得很好。
but I slept great.
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