哈莉·奎茵

《哈莉·奎茵》上季回顾
Last season on Harley Quinn...
我进入了我的绿洲
1 got my green on.
操蛋的是，蝙蝙侠没去看心理医生而造了僵尸。
Batman created zombies instead of going to therapy, for fuck's sake.
小丑成了市长
Joker became the mayor.
我成了毁灭军团的总裁
I went CEO at the LOD.
而哈莉，她加入了蝙蝙侠家族
And Harley, she joined the Bat Fam.
好了你们都跟上了吧？
All right, y'all caught up?
拜托！我只是想要……
Come on! I'm just trying to--
看招！
Nerts, that hurt!
我只是来给我火♥辣♥强大
I am just trying to drop off lunch
的女朋友送午餐
for my hot and powerful girlfriend.
噢！
Ow!
我不能让好人进毁灭军团的门
I can't let good guys into the Legion of Doom.
嗨，宝贝，蝙蝙侠信♥号♥♥灯管用吗？
Hey, babe, is the Bat Signal working?
可以啊，怎么了？等等
Uh, yeah, why? Wait, wait.
它白天不能用吗？
D... Does it not work during the day?
亲爱的，你忘了带午饭。
Honey, you forgot your lunch.
于是我想，那多有情趣，比如说我，犯个罪，
So I thought it would be, like, sexy if I, like, did a crime,
然后你和蝙蝙家赶过来。
and then you and the Bat Fam showed up.
哦，我在毁灭军团给你送午饭呢，噢
Aw, I'm at the LOD with your lunch, ohh.
天啊，我们真可爱
God, we're cute.
太他妈可爱了
So damn cute.
不好，更多的警卫来了
Shit, more guards are coming.
看样子是换班的时候
There must be, like, a shift change.
好了，祝你第一天顺利
Okay, good luck with your first day.
爱你哟。我得挂了
I love you so much. I gotta go.
我更爱你哟
Love you more.
《哈莉·奎茵》第4季第1集
哥谭最热门偶像
-莱克斯 -这不是我的新任女总裁嘛
- Lex. - There's my new SHE-EO.
女性力量什么的
Girl power and all that stuff.
你看，我有个大计划
You know, I got some pretty big plans.
首先从重塑公♥司♥形象开始
Im starting with the corporate rebrand.
你怎么看，比方说，社会性有意识的作恶？
What do you think of, like, socially conscious evil?
对极了
Totally. Totally.
首先，我想公开、轻松地捣毁一个油井
First, I thought I'd destroy an oil rig safely, obviously.
让高管们喝光所有的油然后炸掉
And make the execs drink all the oil and boom,
高死亡数，零环境损害。
high body count, zero environmental damage.
所有细节都在这个彩色标签活页夹里
All the deets are here in this color-coded tabbed binder.
嗯
Mmm.
喔，你知道吗？我觉得我们应该有个好的开始
Well, you know what? I think we'd start things off on the right foot
比如，当着所有人面的钥匙交接仪式
to do, like, a ceremonial handing over the keys in front of everyone.
不行。我要去屋顶的发射台
Can't. I'm going to my launchpad on the roof
然后去月球
and then heading to the moon.
月球吗。太酷了
The moon. That's cool. That's cool.
希望火箭的形状不是一个巨大的鸡♥巴♥
Hope the rocket isn't shaped like a giant penis.
我说的对吗？
Am 1 right?
这是有科学原因的
There is a scientific reason
火箭必须是这个样子
the rocket needs to look like that.
好了该你上场啦
All right, this is you.
向前一步，打破常规什么的
Lean in, disrupt, and things of that nature.
那当然，谢了
lt aint no thang.
噢，该死，真受不了
Oh, shit. That was terrible.
让开，女士
Move, lady.
我要视线畅通，好好看着新总裁进来
I want a perfect view of the doorway for where the new CEO comes in.
我希望他很酷。也希望他认为我很酷。
I hope he's chill. I hope he thinks I'm chill.
闭嘴
Shut up.
我想确保能听到新总裁的脚步声。
I want to be able to hear the new CEO's footsteps.
噢哦，我猜没人让你们进来的吧
Oh, uh, so I'm guessing nobody sort of, um, let you guys in.
不过，惊喜吧！我就是新的总裁。
But, uh, surprise. I'm the new CEO,
我去，这是真的
Fuck, it is true.
看她的马克杯
Look at her mug.
弗里克
Frick.
她肯定和莱克斯上♥床♥了
She must have slept with Lex.
我希望她怀孕了
1 hope she gets pregnant.
莱克斯向维♥权♥暴民低头，雇了个女的
Lex bowed to the woke mob and hired a skirt.
- Okay.
我们何不坐下来好好谈——
Why dont we all just, like, take a seat and we can all discuss--
你觉得我们应该停止
How you think we should stop
用啤酒冲休息室的咖啡吗？
brewing the break room coffee with beer?
是呀，哦，因为那听着就他妈的恶心。
Yeah, well, 'cause that sounds fucking gross.
可听好了。计划是社会性有意识的作恶。
But listen up. The plan is socially conscious evil.
现在，如果你们看着手上的卷宗，
Now, if you look in your dossier,
你们就会明白我们将如何团结一致实现它。
you're gonna see how together we're gonna make that happen.
绝不可能
Never.
要不是这个文件夹用来吸白粉真的很完美,
If this folder wasn't literally perfect for doing lines off of,
我就把它扔进垃圾桶了。
I'd throw it in the trash.
没错，垃圾桶
That's right, the trash.
哪怕，我知道这是可回收的
Even though, I know this is recyclable.
如果我们想被一个女人使唤
If we wanted to get bossed around by a lady,
我们可以找女朋友
we would get girlfriends.
那太不酷了！
This is so not chill!
该死，这是手榴弹
Oh, shit. That's a grenade.
去你的
Fuck.
“神奇女侠最爱的冬季沙拉食谱”？
"Wonder Woman's favorite winter salad recipes"?
老天，她喜欢的还有什么？杀掉我。
Oh, God. She has more than one? Kill me.
喔，最热门偶像清单。
Ooh, the Hottest Hotties list.
这期看起来很有趣的样子
Such a fun issue.
我的新工作大概20分钟后开始
I start a new gig in, like, 20.
跟你说。我可不想早到，显得太努力。
Don't wanna show up early and seem like a try-hard, you know.
什么鬼？
The hell?
德沃拉·麦克沃斯是第三？
Devora Macklewaithe's number three?
她凭什么这么热门？
What makes her so hot?
麦克沃斯小姐拥有哥谭最美的锁骨。
Miss Macklewaithe has the most beautiful clavicle in Gotham.
当然，我是说，不管锁骨是什么，
For sure, I mean, whatever a clavicle is,
她肯定有个漂亮的。
she certainly, certainly got a nice one.
猪面教授，我不能被人看见和你说话，无意冒犯。
Oh, Professor Pyg, I can't be seen talking to you, no offense.
就因为我不帅吗？
Because I'm not a hottie?
就算不帅也是人啊。
Notties are people, too.
是因加我是英雄伙儿的主角
'Cause I'm a major player on the hero scene.
没错，我和神奇女侠。
Yep, me and Wonder Woman.
她把菠菜叫什么新式生菜，那还旧版甘蓝呢？
You know, she called spinach the new romaine, but the old kale?
哦，算了。
Uh, okay.
那位老太太似乎过马路有困难
That old lady seems to be having one heck of a time crossing the street.
我得去救救她，再见
1 gotta go save her ass, bye.
那是鸟，那是飞机。
It's a bird, it's a plane.
那是哈莉.奎茵闪亮登场！
It's motherfucking Harley Quinn!
喂，喂？
Hello?
是我的造型不够戏剧化吗？
Was my pose not dramatic enough?
怪你们的灯光太柔和了。
1 blame your very soft lighting.
哈莉，很高兴见到你。
Harley, it's great to see you.
噢，回旋镖队长。
Oh, Captain Boomerang.
他很会找拍照角度。
He knows his angles.
那么，计划是什么？我们打他个屁滚尿流？
Okay, so what's the plan? We kicking his ass?
我是说，今天周一，他多半在老年中心玩宾果游戏。
I mean, it's Monday, so he's probably at bingo at the senior center.
他爱上了个成熟♥女♥人。
He loves a mature woman.
呃，恶心。
Ugh, ew.
我们只是在更新犯罪数据库。
Were just updating our criminal database.
是啊，我们在他们确实犯罪之前不能打他个屁滚尿流。
Yeah, we can't kick anyone's ass until they actually do crimes.
噢，太好了，行吧。
Oh, great, great, okay.
要不……我们上500同城，
What... What if we go on Cleggslist,
发个招聘“杀手”的岗位，
and post a job opportunity for "murderer",
不管谁应征就砸碎他们的头骨？
then bash the skulls of anyone who applies?
我们可是英雄，
Were heroes.
我们更新记录，做文书工作并保持身材，
We update records, do paperwork and stay fit,
直到电脑告诉我们有罪案。
until the computer tells us there's a crime.
行啊，也对。
Cool. Yeah, yeah,
嗯，不如我们一边做事，
Um, how about while we do that,
一边彼此多认识一下？
we get to know each other better?
你们看，我三个最大的兴奋点是——
You know, my three biggest turn ons are--
哈莉，你的轻浮不适合这里。
Harley, your frivolity is not an asset here.
哎呀！我就是想心灵相通一下。