哈莉·奎茵

就好像我要去月球上
It's like I'm going to a business convention
参加商务会议一样。
on the fucking moon.
注意避开来自沙纳加星任何人。他们都有衣原体。
Avoid everyone from Thanagar. They all have chlamydia.
诺拉，这是个商务会议。
Nora, it's a business conference.
不是什么星际狂欢活动。
It's not some intergalactic orgy situation.
噢，所以你会是第一个从商务会议
Oh, so you'll be the first person to come back
归来时没被衣原体感染的人？
from a business conference without chlamydia?
-行吧。 -我想是的。
- Okay. - I guess so.
我是说，我…我打算主导这次会议。
I mean, I'm... I'm planning to dominate this conference.
搞定小组讨论，在酒会厮混，
Crushing panels, mingling at drinks,
和邪恶的总裁们建立病态的联♥系♥。
making sick connections with evil CEOs.
好的，那么，如果你尿尿的时候感觉刺痛，
Okay, well, when it starts to sting when you pee,
给雨果·斯特兰奇教授打电♥话♥。
call Professor Hugo Strange.
他就是个活药房♥。
He's a walking pharmacy.
噢，这是什么？呃……
Oh, what's this? Uh...
我贞操带的钢匙爱你的哈莉另
外我没有备用钥匙请不要弄丢了
嗷！
Aw!
这是去月球上马尔肯会场的
This is the final boarding call
最后一次登机通知！
for the MalCon Forum on the moon!
该死！
Shit!
这好像是我见过最贵的假阳♥具♥了。
That's like the most expensive dildo I've ever seen.
希望这些云不会有呕吐反射。
I hope the clouds don't have a gag reflex.
对于你们这些觉得这很滑稽的人，
For those of you who think this is funny,
它不得不做成这形状是有科学原因的。
there's a scientific reason it has to be shaped like this.
啊，那这些阴毛是怎么回事，伙计？
Uh, what's with the pubes, dude?
嘿，我能听到你说话。
Hey, there. I can hear you.
天线必须是粗糙坚硬的
The antennas have to be coarse and wiry
并且贴在蛋蛋…我是说球体上。
and on the balls... I mean orbs.
那么，我们来几张我和太空鸡鸡的快照吧。
So, let's get some quick pics of me with the space dong.
放尊重点
Have some respect.
你可是在一座科学大教堂里
You are in a cathedral of science.
快登上该死的火箭，我要发射了。
Get on the fucking rocket, so I can blastoff.
嚯，嚯！
Ho, ho!
今晚天空要怀孕了。
The sky is getting pregnant tonight.
如果火箭不能释放蒸汽它就会生病
A rocket gets sick if it can't release its steam.
《哈莉·奎茵》第4季第4集
不染衣原体的商务会议
这可不是对待老朋友的方式
This is no way to treat an old friend.
我得设法排满日程，市长先生。
I have to find a way to fill my days, Mr. Mayor.
我想偷一艘火箭飞船，
I wanted to steal a rocket ship,
但它们都在月球上。
but they're all on the moon.
我真不敢相信我没收到去马尔肯的邀请。
I can't believe I didn't get an invite to MalCon.
去年可是我定的主题。
Last year I'm giving the keynote.
今年，那些朝三暮四、见风使舵的法外分子
This year, those fickle, fair-weather one-percenters
装得好像我不存在。
act like I don't even exist.
他们说得对。我洗劫你只是抢劫
They're right. I'm only ransacking you as a dry run
州长官邸抢劫的彩排。
for my governor's mansion heist.
拿上那把大剪刀！
Grab those giant scissors!
嘿，那是我参加洗车店开业典礼要用的。
Hey, I need those for a car wash grand opening.
放开这个变♥态♥，你们这些变♥态♥。
Let this sicko go, you sickos.
噢，是蝙蝠哈莉。
Oh, it's Bat Harley.
你现在和我一样有两张脸，哈？
You've got two faces like me now, huh?
我更喜欢旧的那个。
I like the old one better.
噢！是艾薇。
Oh! There's Ivy.
玩得开心。喔！
Have a great time. Whoo!
是另一枚火箭吗？
It was another rocket?
你可能有两张脸，
You may have two faces,
而我有两根根子。
but I have two maces.
等等！我的棍子呢？
Wait! Where are my maces?
我的手里剑，它们不见了。
My shuriken, they're missing.
-你的什么？ -他们是投掷星星。那不重要，快帮忙！
- Your what? - They're throwing stars. Doesn't matter, help!
啊，我明明带了我的凝胶炸♥弹♥。
Uh, I know I packed my gel bombs.
我们的东西呢？
Where's our stuff?
哈！把他们送我这边，我来处理。
Ha! Send them my way. I'll handle it.
喔，你还是那么犀利。
Ooh, you've got that edge still.
你一定很怀念作恶的日子吧？
You must really miss being evil, huh?
别再把你的破事投射到我身上了，市长先生。
Stop projecting your own shit on me, Mr. Mayor.
您的小腿泵，先生。
Your calf pumps, sir.
莱克斯·卢瑟是个抽象概念
Lex Luthor is an abstraction.
真正的我不存在……出于纳税考虑
There is no real me... for tax purposes.
有关我的一切都是人造的
Everything about me is artificial.
我的下颌轮廓，我的空壳公♥司♥，
My jawline, my shell companies,
甚至我在月球上的所有照明。
even all my lighting on the moon.
顺便说一句，那是小海豹的血。
That's baby seal blood, by the way.
在地球上是极其违法的。
Very, very illegal on earth.
你的身体太让我着迷了。
Your body has me literally reeling.
连超人都会羡慕您那腹肌的。
Superman wishes he had those cumgutters.
准备好揭掉了吗
Ready for your peel?
让我们褪去死皮吧，妈妈。
Let's shed that dead skin, mama.
蛇就是这样保持光滑的。
It's what snakes do to stay smooth.
-是这样。 -没错。
- They do. - It's true.
-呃，卢瑟先生？我的提问是，这些人是谁？
Uh, yeah. Mr. Luthor? Uh, sir, my question was, who are these guys?
-我是乔恩。 -我也是乔恩。
- I'm Jon. - I'm also Jon.
-但我的名字里没有“h”。 -我的也没有。
- But there's no "h" in my name. - Or in mine.
我们是这尊轮廓分明的希腊神灵的公♥关♥团队。
We're this chiseled Greek god's PR team.
你在哪家报社工作来着？
What paper do you work for again?
-星球日报 -更像是超人日报
- The Daily Planet. - More like The Daily Superman.
那挺适合你。
Well, good for you.
终于可以写点别的，而非那个兴奋过度，
Finally writing about something other than that super-jacked,
没有档案的超级外星人。
certainly undocumented super-alien.
嗯，我在月球上呆了一个星期
Um, so I've been on the moon for a week
看着这场大会集♥合♥，
watching this conference come together,
我仍然不知道你将在主题演讲中宣布♥什♥么…
and I still don't know what you'll be announcing at the keynote...
噢，不过就是永恒变化的
Oh, well. Just forever changing
科学和工业的关联。不能剧透。
the nexus of science and industry. No spoilers.
令人激动！那太棒了。我都等不及了！
Exciting! That's so great. I can't wait!
天啊。唔。是这咖啡特别浓吗？
Man. Wow. Is this coffee extra strong?
我…我就是很兴奋。我…喔！
I... I just I am jazzed. I am... Whoo!
最后一个问题，哦，关于你的学员，毒藤女。
And one last question, uh, about your mentee, Poison Ivy.
略过。这是对莱克斯·卢瑟的采访，不是他的门徒。
Pass. This is an interview about Lex Luthor, not his protege.
我很乐意谈谈艾薇。
I am happy to talk about Ivy.
任命像她这样的人担任总裁需要很大的勇气。
It takes a lot of courage to install someone like her as a CEO.
不仅因为她是女人，
Not only is she a woman,
还是个绿色的女人。
but a green woman.
只有真正的超前思想者才能做到。
Only a true forward thinker could come up with that.
一个强壮到可以用腋窝碎核桃的人。
Someone so strong that he can crack a walnut with his armpit.
-你看如何？ -不要刊登这些。
- You care to see? - Don't print any of that.
我们的装备呢？
And what happened to our gear?
我们看起来像个外行。
We looked like amateurs out there.
我觉得我看起来挺好的啊。
I thought I looked pretty good.
啊，一定是有人搞破坏。
Ugh. Someone must have sabotaged us.
啊，我妈怎么来了？
Uh, why is Mommy here?
你妈妈破坏了我们的相机。
Your mommy took our camera.
放下我们的东西！
Unhand our stuff!
这从来都不是你们的东西。
This has never been your stuff.
这是韦恩企业的财产，
It's property of Wayne Enterprises,
而它正濒临财务危机。
which is teetering on a financial cliff.
所以我要清算所有不重要的资产。
So I'm liquidating all nonessential assets.
我们需要武器来保护哥谭。
We need our weapons to protect Gotham.
长久以来，你们这些娇生惯养的蝙蝠宝宝们
For far too long, you coddled bat-babies
依靠着这些微不足道的小玩意，
have relied on trivial gadgetry,
却一直在削弱你们的终极武器。
while you've let your ultimate weapons grow soft.
-那就是你们的身体 -不对。我有六块坚硬的腹肌。
- Your bodies. - Nuh-uh. I have a rock hard six pack.
妈妈
Mom.
从即日起，
Effective immediately,
韦恩企业不再为你们提供资金
you are no longer being financed by Wayne Enterprises
现在，请见谅，我要去月球了。
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to the moon.
噢，还有这个。生日快乐，儿子。
Oh, and here. Happy Birthday, son.
我的生日是五个月前。
My birthday was five months ago.
这是个拨浪鼓吗？
Is this a rattle?
感觉她本可以把它也清算掉的。
Feels like she could've liquidated that.