哈莉·奎茵

当小丑市长解散警局
When Mayor Joker disbanded the police
并使得我被迫退休的时候，
and launched me into forced retirement,
我不知道我还能干什么。
I didn't know what I was gonna do.
从我职业生涯的灰烬中，
From the ashes that are my career,
一只火红，丰满的凤♥凰♥站了起来。
a fiery, bosomy phoenix has risen.
那只凤♥凰♥就是你，芭芭拉，
And that phoenix is you, Barbara,
喔，我等不及要和你做♥爱♥了
Ooh, I can't wait to make love to you
这可是20年来头一次。
for the first time in 20 years.
我就看看是谁。
I should just see who this is.
-喂？ -您好我是诺拉·弗瑞兹，娘家姓雅各布森。
-Yello? -Hey, it's Nora Freeze, nee Jacobsen,
毁灭军团首席执行官的行政助理。
executive assistant to the CEO of the Legion of Doom.
-你被迷住了，我确信。 -我没被迷住。
-Charmed, I'm sure. -Un-charmed.
-什么事？ -是这样的，毁灭军团需要一个保安，
-What do you want? - Well, the LOD needs a security guard,
我在努南家的飞镖靶上看到你的简历钉在上面。
and I found your resume taped to a dartboard at Noonan's.
詹姆斯·“w” 吉姆·戈登
工作经历：哥谭警局局长
·抓坏蛋
·把坏蛋送入牢房♥
关系人：
蝙蝎侠
技能：
超级勇敢
非常强壮
络腮胡
会一点点数学
能用两个食指打字
公♥证♥人执照(已过期)
你想要这份工作吗？
So you want the job?
是的！我接受。
Yes! I accept.
噢，天啊。谢谢你。
Oh, my God. Thank you.
退休快让我闲疯了。
I was going crazy in retirement.
和梦中情人激♥情♥做♥爱♥
Passionate lovemaking with the woman of my dreams
对我这老家伙来说压力太大了。
is too much pressure for this ol' sack.
-怎么了，宝贝？ -工作电♥话♥，我亲爱的。
- What's going on, baby? - Duty calls, mon cherie.
喔-嚯！
Whoo-hoo!
吉米·戈回来了，宝贝。
Jimmy G's back, baby.
我要怎么从这下去？
How am I supposed to get down from here?
噢，芭芭拉。
Oh, Barbara.
《哈莉·奎茵》第4季第5集
去找冰男人，不用等
喔！
Ow!
还记得我们和克莱格民宿的客人打架用的活页夹吗？
Remember this binder from when we fought the CleggBnB guest?
哥们，这超棒的。
Man, that was amazing.
我是说，看，上面还有约纳斯的阴毛。
I mean, look, it still has some of Yonas' pubes on it.
哈莉，还是专心于任务吧。
Harley, maybe focus on the mission.
我也正想这个呢。
I was thinking that too.
等等。你们的友谊手镯呢？
Wait. Where are you guys' friendship bracelets?
我们不戴是因为我们不是朋友。
We're not wearing them because we're not friends.
我们只是一起打击犯罪的超能力者。
We're just super people who fight crime together.
我们当然是朋友！
Of course we're friends!
就跟我的前同伙一样。
Just like my old crew.
蝙蝠女，你是鲨鱼王。
Batgirl, you're King Shark.
罗宾，你是神经博士。
Robin, you're Psycho.
哦，至于夜翼，你是泥脸，
Uh. And Nightwing, you are Clayface,
因为你实在是戏剧女王。
because of what a drama queen you are.
我们战斗的时候别说话。
Stop talking while we're fighting.
瞧，好个泥脸。
See, such a Clayface.
呀！
Ya!
直到我开始跟你们在暗处悄悄行动
I never realized how bad my night vision was
我才意识到我的夜视能力有多差。
until I started sneaking around in the shadows with you.
这就解释了我为什么给艾薇的腋窝口♥交♥。
It does explain why I went down on Ivy's armpit.
-嗯，她还是去了那儿。 -哈莉，小心！
-Meh, she still got there. -Harley, watch out!
-喔！ -伙计，看清楚路！
- Ooh! - Dude, watch where you're going!
好吧，我知道怎么回事了。
Okay, okay. I see what's going on.
你们不让我走进你们的内心，因为我的视力太差。
You haven't let me into your hearts because my eyes suck.
别戳我的肚子！
Don't boop my tummy!
我会保护你的。
I'll protect you.
镭射视力矫正手术很成功！
The LASIK went great!
你的夜视能力现在是20/20。
Your night vision is now 20/20.
谢谢你的英雄折扣。
Thank you for the hero discount.
我等不及要用我的新眼睛给蝙蝠全家一个惊喜了。
I cannot wait to surprise the Bat Family with my new eyes.
如果他们看到我为了变得更好所付出的努力
If they see how far I'm willing to go to be better,
也许他们会戴上我送的手链作为回应。
maybe they'll reciprocate and wear my bracelet.
嗯哼。我们给你的紧急联♥系♥人打了电♥话♥
Mmm-hmm. We called your emergency contact
让她来接你，但她的助理说她没空。
to pick you up, but her assistant said she was unavailable.
她还说这样分头发让我看起来像个家庭主妇。
She also said parting my hair like this makes me look matronly.
但她看不到我，对吧？
But she couldn't see me, right?
哦，是的。诺拉。让我试试，艾薇。
Ugh, yeah. Nora. Let me try, Ivy.
打电♥话♥给灵魂伴侣桃子表情
Call Soulmate Peach Emoji
冒汗表情魔鬼号♥角微笑。
Sweat Droplets Emoji Devil Horn Smile.
嗨，我是艾薇。请留言。
Hi, you've reached Ivy. Leave a message.
但记住，这可能是条短♥信♥。
But just remember, this could've been a text.
噢，她一定是卡在月球海关了。
Oh, she must be stuck in Moon customs.
还有其他人能联♥系♥上吗？
Is there anyone else we could call?
有啊，我有长达一英里的清单。
Yeah, I got a list a mile fucking long.
-你在哪？ -我在看医生。
- Where are you? - I'm at the doctor.
猜猜是哪个科。
Guess what kind.
好吧。即使对他来说，这也太他妈粗鲁了。
Okay. That was fucking rude, even for him.
不过，没事。我将打给旋风伯爵，蝙蝠女！
But, uh, that's fine. I'll just call the earl of twirl, Batgirl!
哈莉。很高兴接到你的电♥话♥。
Harley. I'm so happy to hear from you.
我在享受去意大利的旅途呢。
I'm having quite the time getting to Italy.
先生，我们再问你一次。
Sir, we'll ask you one more time.
为什么不摘下面具？
Why won't you take off your mask?
是的，我不是特意打给你的。我得挂了。
Yeah. I didn't actually mean to call you. I gotta go.
别挂。
Don't hang up.
我要你告诉诺拉…气死我了！
I need you to tell Nora that... Goddamn it!
你最好找别人来接你，
You better find someone else to pick you up,
否则我们就只能撤销手术，那样你就可以自己回家了。
or else we'll be forced to reverse the surgery so you can get home yourself.
明白，我尽力，我尽力
Okay, I'm trying. I'm trying
我被抛弃了！
I've been abandoned!
鼓掌
and applauding
这就是那个征服月球的女人。
There's the woman who conquered the Moon.
眼见你和荒原狼一起。
Saw you with Steppenwolf.
-真有你的。 -这是塔莉娅·阿古尔送来的。
- Big ups. - This is from Talia Al Ghul.
嗷，这个脆饼枪也太逼真了吧。
Aw, this pretzel gun is so realistic.
看这个。
Look at that.
子弹是饼干做的。
The bullets are cookies.
我不在的时候错过什么了吗？
So while I was gone, what'd I miss?
我不知道。我以为你不在的时候，我也休假。
I don't know. I thought when you were off, I was off.
嘿，开这枪的时候注意瞄哪里。
Hey, careful where you shoot those guns.
它们减掉腰围。
They kill the waistline.
噢，莱克斯。你看上去皮肤紧致。
Oh, Lex. You look very taut.
你的头发挺直，
Your hair looks spiky,
颧骨还特别高耸。
and your cheeks are very high up.
-过来抱一个，小妞。 -哼？
- Get over here, girly. - Hmm?
你在会议上大获成功
You killed it at the conference.
真的？你可是好像有点生气
Really? Because you seemed a little mad
当你吼着让所有人离开你的月球时。
when you screamed at everyone to get off your moon.
噢，突发愤怒是强制我的身体接受猎鹰DNA的副作用。
Oh, sudden rage is a side effect of forcing my body to accept falcon DNA.
我来是帮让你更上一层楼。
I came here to help bring you to the next level.
我把我的公♥关♥团队送给你。
I'm gifting you my PR team.
乔恩们。
The Jons.
他们是业内最好的。
They're the best in the biz.
谢谢你，莱克斯。你真慷慨。
Thank you, Lex. That's very generous.
还有你们，
And also for you guys,
我喜欢你们的鞋子
love how all of your shoes
都是深浅度略有不同的棕色。
are a slightly different shade of brown.
哎呀！是栗色。
Gasp! They're chestnut.
-柚木色。 -深灰褐。
- Teak. - Taupe.
牛奶巧克力，不过是欧洲的那种。
Milk chocolate, but the European kind.
我真不觉得我需要公♥关♥团队。
I really don't think I need a PR team.
拿工作成绩说话。
The work speaks for itself.
-电♥话♥，电♥话♥。 -喂？妄想狂。
- Ring, ring, ring, ring. - Uh, hello? Delusion.
姑娘，你是怎么得到这个号♥码的？
Girl, how'd you get this number?
不好意思，艾薇，是找你的。
Excuse me, Ivy, It's for you.
现在我已经给你介绍了红衫男，电脑伙计，
Now that I've introduced you to redshirt guy, computer dude,
还有那个不知道我讨厌他的家伙。
and guy who doesn't know I hate him.
-嗨！ -我可以向你展示办公室最棒的部分