哈莉·奎茵

Harley Quinn S04E03

Part 3 Oct. 30, 2023, 9:41 a.m.

-唔…… -我是说，不像……
- Um... - I mean, not like...
当然不是代替你。我……
Obviously not instead of you. I...
对，不不，我明白。
Yeah. No, no, I know.
好啦，我们去拿该死的票。
All right, let's get these fucking tickets.
等下。是个得癌症的孩子？
Hold up. It's a cancer kid?
也许她妈妈得了孟乔森综合症，
Look, maybe the mom has Munchausens.
她才是真正的恶人。
She's the real monster here.
好吧。那我们拿着他父母的票带他去看演出吧。
Right. Let's just take his parents' tickets and go to the show with him.
不，我们不能这么做。
No, we can't do that.
我们需要第三个座位来放包。
We need the third seat for our purses.
哈哈
Ha-ha!
是我，捉摸不定的女歌♥手
'Tis I, the elusive chanteuse
泥脸
Clayface.
啦啦啦啦
♪ La, la, la, la ♪
等等，那我儿子呢？
Wait, where's my son?
你个疯狂的小变♥态♥。
You twisted little freak.
我知道你没有票。
I knew you didn't have tickets.
而你哪怕只回复
All you had to do was reply
我发送的数十封邮件和短♥信♥
to one of the baker's dozens of emails and texts
的其中一条。
I sent about my show.
噢，朋友间的几条未读短♥信♥算什么？
Oh, what's a few unread texts between friends?
没人在乎你的见解，陌生人。
No one cares for your opinion, stranger.
你以为你可以在这里闲逛
You think you can swan in here
并且晃着你的大老板鸡♥巴♥要什么有什么？
and swing your big boss dick around and get anything you want?
到处都有我的耳目和粉丝。
I have eyes and ears and Ramonas everywhere.
如果你觉得自己像个傻瓜就拨6。
Dial six if you feel like a fool.
你得了个常驻演出安排，突然就跩个二五八万，
You get one residency, and suddenly you're all,
“哦，啦啦，我是泥脸，我是大天后”
"Ooh, la, la, I'm Clayface. I'm a big, uh, diva."
你竟敢叫我天后？
You dare call moi a diva?
你知道你♥他♥妈♥在跟谁说话吗？
Do you know who you're fucking talking to right now?
你知道你在跟谁说话吗？
Do you know who you're talking to?
是，
Yeah.
我很清楚。
I do.
乡巴佬
Boop.
嘿，宝贝，我们能不能，呃，离这些无辜的旁观者远点？
Hey, babe, can we, uh, sidebar away from all these innocent bystanders?
希望你唱比扔得好，贱♥人♥。
Hope you sing better than you throw, bitch.
不不不不……
Nom, nom, nom, nom...
别又来！
Not again!
恶人们正在毁坏自助餐厅。
Villains are destroying the buffet.
有谁叫个英雄来！
Someone call a hero!
哦，我的英雄本能。
Ooh, my hero instincts.
这就是加什么你总是押注蝙蝠。
And that's why you always bet on Bat.
好啊！
Yes!
嘿！别闹了！
Hey! Cut this shit out!
哈莉！我厌恶带给你坏消息，
Harley! I hate to be the bearer of bad news,
但我另一方面也喜欢它。
but I also kind of love it.
艾薇跟一个戴着俗气粉色假发的维加斯小妞出轨了。
Ivy is stepping out on you with a Vegas-six in a tacky pink wig.
好吧，哈格丽特至少也算哥谭的风云人物。
Okay, Hargret's at least a Gotham eight.
啊，别挡道，小哈！
Ugh, get out of my way, Harls!
你真打算为门票杀死一大群无辜者？
Do you really wanna kill a bunch of innocent people over tickets?
-绝对的！ -胜过一切
- Absolutely! - More than anything.
支持我的女朋友怎么了？
What happened to being my supportive girlfriend?
对不起，艾薇。
Sorry, Ive.
好吧，睢啊，兄弟。恭喜你上节目了。
Okay, look, dude. Mazel on the show.
我们为你感到非常骄傲，虽然我们永远不会告诉你。
We're super proud of you, even though we would never tell you.
现在老实承认我大获成功倒是容易！
Easy to say now that I am a bona fide success!
伤痛！
The gall!
被你们这些贱♥人♥搞得一团糟之后
I may not even go on tonight
我今晚可能都上不了台了。
after what you bitches bedraggled through.
听着！你很生气，我明日，好吗？
Listen, listen! You're mad, I get it, okay?
但你要知道你的愤怒
But you should know that your rage
会突出你额头的皱纹。
is making your forehead wrinkles pop.
别看我！
Don't look at me!
这是你的牌吗？
Is this your card?
不是！
No!
该死。不是？好吧，等等。
Shit. No? Okay, hold on.
脱掉吧，魔术小子！
Take it off, magic boy!
我成功了！
I did it!
我拿到秋葵汤了！
I got the gumbo!
什么？咋弄的？
What? How?
管他呢，给我。
Who cares? Give it to me.
要来了。
Things are happening.
你是说孩子？还是汤？
Baby things? Or is it the soup?
这种汤是用来引产的。
The soup is supposed to induce labor.
什么？歌♥里没提这事啊。
What? That's not in the song.
嗯。你肯定听的电台剪辑版的。
Ugh. You must have listened to the radio edit.
好吧，谁会是我的下一个受害者？
All right, who's gonna be my next victim?
我是说，志愿者。
I mean, volunteer.
-我？ -什么？
- Me? - What?
看，你知道只要我想就可以轻松挣脱这个。
Look, you know I could get out of this if I wanted to.
我知道，但我需要你冷静。
I know, but I needed you to calm down.
情况失控了。
Shit was getting out of hand.
我失控？笑死，好吧，哈格丽特。
I was getting out of hand? LOL. Okay, Hargret.
听着，我很抱歉。
Listen, I'm sorry.
我不知道如何把全新的我带入我们的关系。但是——
I didn't know how to bring the new me to our relationship. But--
噢，是的，宝贝，我并不真的在意票。
Oh, yeah, baby, I, I just don't really care about the tickets.
我只是担心。
I just got worried.
像是，如果我们都不能一起取笑泥脸的节目
Like, what do we have to connect over
那我们之间还有什么纽带？
if we can't even make fun of Clayface's show?
这是你的牌吗？
Is this your card?
观众里有医生吗？
Is anyone in the audience a doctor?
海洋生物学家呢？
A marine biologist?
没有？那……那鲨鱼助产师呢？
No? What... What about a shark doula?
这样，这样，有缓解吗？
There, there. Is this soothing?
感觉舒服点了吗？
Do you feel soothed?
哈莉！你们俩真行！
Harley! You two are real ones!
真高兴你们在这。
I'm so happy you're here.
我需要你用力挤。
I'm gonna need you to push.
我在挤，你这个性感的大礼帽狗屎蛋！
I am pushing, you sexy top-hatted shitbag!
她在用力！
She is pushing!
我看到鳍了！
I see a fin!
八个了。等等，第九个还在里面
That's eight. Wait, nine's still in there
用力，妈妈，用力！
Push, Mama, push!
我不是你妈！
I'm not your Mama!
-他没呼吸。 -什么？
- He's not breathing. - What?
这是你的牌吗？
Is this your card?
那是我的牌！
That's my card!
那是我的牌！
That's my card!
是我，你的友谊馅饼上缺失的一块。
It is I, the missing piece of your friendship pie.
留着你的节目上说吧！
Save it for your show!
为了庆祝这个重要的日子，
To celebrate this momentous day,
我要把我节目前排座位送给新生宝宝们。
I am gifting these new bebes front row seats to my show.
-去你的。 -贱♥人♥。
- Fuck you. - You bitch.
现在，根据我们伟大的海洋法，
Now, as written in our great sea laws,
离出生地最近的两个女同应该成为教父母。
the two dykes in closest proximity to the birth shall be the godparents.
嘿，不过别管啥传统
Hey, but screw tradition.
哈莉和艾薇，
Harley and Ivy,
你们愿意做我们孩子的教母吗？
would you do us the honor of being godmothers?
-太他妈是的！ -当然，我们愿意当教父母。
- Fuck yeah! - Of course, we'll be godparents.
好了，那么，我现在要回海里了。
Okay, well, I'm gonna jet back under the sea now.
什么意思？
What do you mean?
我想共同抚养孩子。
I wanna co-parent.
我们会共同抚养孩子。
We are gonna co-parent.
我带第一个孩子，带走剩下的留给你。
I'm taking the first born and you can have the rest or whatever.
你今天照顾了我，所以我觉得你会是个好爸爸。
You took care of me today so I think you'll be an okay Dad.
再见
Peace.
艾薇
Ive.
-什么？说啊。 -我不该……
- What? Say it. - I shouldn't...
那么，现在你……亲爱的，你得说点什么。
Well, now you... Honey, you've gotta say something now.
好吗？那些鲨鱼好丑。
Okay? Those sharklings are like fugly.