最后一个男人（2015）

The Last Man On Earth S03E14

Part 3 Dec. 1, 2020, 5:06 p.m.

Don't listen to nobody, no how, huh?
什么都不听别人说是吧
Well I got news for you, compadre.
我有消息告诉你老朋友
There are rules around here.
这里是有规矩的
Yeah, things that we do called "Rules."
没错我们做的事叫"规矩"
Everyone's got to follow-- w-w-w-wait!
人人都得遵守...等等等等
Now, w-wait, Jasper!
慢着贾思博
A cigarette?
一根烟
Give me that.
给我
Where'd this come from?
哪里来的
J-Jasper!
贾思博
Where these cigarettes coming from?
这些烟是哪里来的
I found it.
找到了
The river always leads to the lake.
顺藤总能摸到瓜
Look, I can play your game all day long.
我可以跟你玩一整天
So what's your next move, huh?
你下面要做什么
'Cause Tandy ain't going nowhere.
坦迪哪里都不去
Consider us attached to the hip
就当我们是
like a pair of conjoined twinsies.
连体婴儿吧
You know what those are?
你知道那是什么吗
They're twins attached by the skin.
就是皮肤相连的双胞胎
Wait, wait, wait, where you going?
慢着慢着你去哪儿
Jasper!
贾思博
Jasper! Don't leave!
贾思博不要走
Uh... I'll give you your cigarettes back!
我把烟还给你
I'll give them back, yeah.
我还给你
If I give these back to you--
如果我还给你
uh, when I give these back to you,
等我还给你
will-will you do something for me?
你能为我做件事吗
Like a puppet on a string.
就跟提线木偶一样
Well, look who's out and about.
看看谁出来了
Hey, Melissa.
梅丽莎
Have you been Jazzercising?
你练爵士健美操了吗
Oh, no, she just woke from a nap.
没有她只是刚睡醒
Sweating's one of the side effects.
出汗是副作用之一
And tarry stools.
还有粪便发黑
Look, I'd love to get into that later,
我本来想以后再说
but let me just cut to the Chase Manhattan.
但不妨就现在直接说了吧
I've noticed you've been spending a lot of time with Mom lately;
我注意到你最近跟我妈经常待在一起
touching shoulders and whatnot.
碰碰肩膀之类的
And I just need to know,
我需要知道
what are your intentions, Mr. Flores?
你有什么目的弗洛雷斯先生
Uh, Mr. Flores?
弗洛雷斯先生
Pedro Flores, inventor of the yo-yo?
佩德罗·弗洛雷斯悠悠球的发明者
I'm sorry, Carol, I'm not following.
抱歉卡萝尔我不知道你在说什么
Do you intend to wrap my mom around your little finger
你想把我妈缠绕在你的手指头上
and toy with her, hmm?
然后玩她吗
Do a little down-up, down-up,
上上下下
maybe walk the dog,
遛狗
go around the world.
全世界跑
And once you've had your fun,
等你玩够了
stick her in a drawer
把她跟你的玩具
with your Pogs and Tamagotchis.
一起放到抽屉里
Carol, Gail and I have been through a lot.
卡萝尔盖尔和我一起经历过很多
I-I'd never do anything to hurt her.
我绝不会做任何伤害她的事
Good.
那就好
Don't ever try anything funny, Todd,
别想耍花招陶德
'cause I'll be watching you.
因为我会盯着你
Watching you like a hog.
跟阉猪一样盯着你
Evening, everyone.
晚上好各位
Oh, hey, Melissa, hey.
梅丽莎你好啊
You been Jazzercising?
你练爵士健美操了吗
Keep it up, looking trim.
继续下去看着不错
Anyway, a little birdie told me there was a bit of concern
总之有人告诉我有人担心
about my parenting skills.
我为人父母的技能
Uh, in light of that,
鉴于此
I just wanted you all to know that Jasper is dead.
我想告诉你们贾思博已经死了
No! What?
不什么
Uh-- sorry, metorically, not literally.
抱歉不是真死了比喻意义上的死
Idiot.
白♥痴♥
Could've been a little more clear about that.
我应该说得更清楚的
Yeah. But, yes,
对但是
I, you know, I slaughtered the old Jasper,
我确实杀死了以前的贾思博
I burned his corpse and dumped his ashes in the toilet.
我烧了他的尸体把他的骨灰丢进马桶里了
But like the phoenix, Jasper is reborn.
但贾思博像凤♥凰♥一样重生了
And now,
现在
it gives me the greatest of pleasures
我很高兴地在此
to introduce you to... the new Jasper!
给大家介绍崭新的贾思博
Jasper, what do we do when we enter a room?
贾思博我们进入房♥间时应该怎么做
What a gentleman.
真是绅士
Have a seat, please.
请坐
Jasper, I was just about to ask you what we immediately do
贾思博我本来要问你在餐桌上坐下时
upon sitting at the dinner table,
应该先做什么的
but looks like you beat me to the punch.
但看来你抢先我一步了
That's right, we put our napkins in our laps.
没错我们要把从餐巾放到大腿上
Good job, Jasper.
做得好贾思博
Good job.
做得好
That's right, explosives, even in fist form,
没错即使只是拳头形式的爆♥炸♥
are only for adults.
也只有成年人才可以做
I taught him about the dangers of explosives.
我教过他爆♥炸♥物很危险
Oh, wow. Wow. II got to say,
厉害不得不说
you do seem to have made some progress with the little one.
在你的努力下这个小家伙确实有进步
Thank you, Gail. Now, Jasper,
谢谢你贾思博现在贾思博
what do we say when someone pays us a compliment?
有人表扬的时候我们应该说什么
Jasper, you're doing so great.
贾思博你做得太好了
Tandy, what are you passing Jasper?
坦迪你把什么给了贾思博
A compliment for a job well done.
他做得好给他的奖励
Oh, no, I think I saw you give him something under the table.
不我好像看到你从桌子底下给了他什么东西
Holy hell, he's giving him cigarettes.
天啊他给了他烟
Tandy? Cigarettes?
坦迪烟
You've got to be kidding me! What?
开什么玩笑什么
Jasper, where'd you get all those cigarettes?
贾思博你从哪里弄来那么多烟
Oh, come on, Tandy, we all know where he got them!
拜托坦迪我们都知道他哪里弄来的
Well, then somebody please tell me
那拜托你们谁告诉我
'cause I'm in the dark here.
因为我什么都不知道
Tandy!
坦迪
What?!
什么
Hello! Where'd that come from? What?
你看这都从哪里来的
Jasper, did you put cigarettes in my shorts pocket?
贾思博你把烟放到我的短裤兜里的吗
That's it, Tandy, I really don't think
行了坦迪我真心觉得
you should have anything to do with this kid.
你不该离这个孩子太近
But we share a special bond.
但我们有特殊联♥系♥
Yeah, they're called cigarettes.
没错就是烟
But those have nothing to do with it.
但这与事情一点关系都没有
Look, he loves me like a point person.
你看他像爱领导人一样爱我
Well, then I think it's time he picks a new point person.
那我觉得他应该选个新领导人了
Okay, Jasper.
好贾思博
Now when I say go, you're gonna walk to the person
等我说开始你就走去那个
you want as your point person, okay?
你想要的领导人边上好吗
And people who he doesn't go to?
他不去找的人
No crying, please.
请不要难过
The system's not rigged.
我们没作弊
Okay, you ready?
好准备好了吗
Look at that.
你看
Tandy, no cigarettes.
坦迪不要拿烟
Nice try, Gail, but you can't just
别想了盖尔你不能
spring a last-minute rule on me here, right?
最后一刻再给我加一条规则对吧
Right? No! No.
对吧不
Tandy, no. Tandy, no.
坦迪不坦迪不
Okay, fine, fine.
行好吧好吧
Okay, Jasper, you ready?
好贾思博准备好了吗