最后一个男人（2015）

The Last Man On Earth S03E14

Part 2 Dec. 1, 2020, 5:06 p.m.

Yeah, come over and check it out.
来吧过来看看
Oh, no, no, no, no!
不不不
This one's for me, okay?
这是我喝的好吗
But don't you worry, 'cause I got you
但你别担心因为我给你准备了
a hot tub sundae!
圣代浴缸
Come on, Jasper, last one in is a rotten egg.
来吧贾思博后进去的是臭鸡蛋
Oh, very slippery.
好滑哦
Come on!
来啊
You're a rotten egg.
你是臭鸡蛋
JK, bud. Oh, this is so great.
开玩笑的兄弟这真的太棒了
Look at this, look at this. I got the whipped cream.
你看你看我准备了奶油
Some peanuts.
花生
And some cherries, too, huh?
还有樱桃
This is fun and delicious, huh?
又好玩又好吃
Oh, that whipped cream has gone bad.
这个奶油坏掉了
It's gone bad. Yes, it's rancid.
坏掉了没错好恶心
Where you going, bud?
你去哪儿啊兄弟
You gonna get a big run-up?
你需要很远的距离来助跑吗
Gonna cannonball me? Nice try.
想要砸死我吗你想得美
Jasper. Jasper.
贾思博贾思博
Crack that whip.
鞭子生生作响
Hey, Todd. Hey.
你好啊陶德你好啊
What are you up to?
你在干什么呢
Ah, just going to give Melissa her medication.
正准备去给梅丽莎送药
Oh. How's that going?
怎么样了
Well, apparently it takes a few weeks to see results.
显然要等上几周才能看到疗效
But the side effects are coming in hot,
但副作用已经显现出来了
so that's a good sign.
所以也算是个好迹象吧
You know, increased heart rate,
心跳加速啊
lots of sweats, tarry stools...
多汗黑便
Don't need all the deets, Todd.
你不用全告诉我陶德
Copy that.
明白
Hey, thanks again for your help.
再次谢谢你的帮忙
I couldn't have done it without you.
没有你的话我不可能做到
Hey, bud.
伙计
I know this all must be so new and scary,
我知道这一切对你来说肯定又新颖又可怕
but I'd like to introduce you to a friend,
但我想给你介绍一个朋友
who might just make you feel a little more comfortable.
他也许能让你感到自如一些
This is Gary.
他叫加里
When I was all alone,
我之前独身一人的时候
this little guy was everything to me.
这个小家伙就是我的一切
A mother, a father,
是我的父母
a brother, a sister.
也是我的兄弟姐妹
A distant uncle who tells it like it is.
也是我的远房♥表叔
And I'll be honest, a few days away from being a lover.
说实话差一点他就要成为我的爱人了
But most of all,
但最重要的还是
he was my best friend.
他是我最好的朋友
Now I'd like him to be your best friend.
现在我希望他能成为你最好的朋友
Oh, no, no, no, no!
不不不不不
Erica, stop! Gary!
艾瑞卡停车加里
Gary! No!
加里不
I saw what you did last summer.
我知道你去年夏天做了什么
What?
什么
You and... Todd.
你和陶德
Me and Todd what?
我和陶德怎么了
The way he touched your shoulder?
他碰触你肩膀的方式
I thought the fireworks would burn my face off.
你们之间的火花差点崩掉了我的脸
Felt like the 4th of May over there.
仿佛像是五月四日的氛围
You mean 4th of July?
你是想说七月四日吧[独♥立♥日]
No, the 4th of May-- International Walkers Day.
不啊五月四日国际男伴节
My family were avid walkers. Big pedophiles.
我家里人都是积极的男伴超级恋童
Anyways, I thought you two were broken up.
不管怎样我以为你们俩分手了
We are broken up.
我们是分手了
Hell, friends can touch shoulders,
朋友之间也可以碰肩膀的
for God sakes, Carol.
我的天卡萝尔
Well, looks like this friend was
看来这位朋友
itching for some benefits.
有些心痒难耐呢
Carol, why are you all up in my butt about this?
卡萝尔你为什么对这事这么刨根究底
It's a tale as old as time.
这是一个古老的故事
Girl gets stuck in an elevator, nearly dies.
一个女孩困在了电梯里差点丧命
Comes out scared, emotional, raw.
出来的时候又害怕又感伤又空虚
And then her scenester ex-boyfriend swoops in
然后她的前男友突然出现
with his shoulder touches and his sweet talk.
碰了她的肩膀甜蜜地安慰了她
"Hey, babe, how you feeling? You feeling raw?
宝贝你还好吗你空虚吗
I'll make it go away."
我能驱散它哦
And then you boink all night.
然后你们整晚啪啪啪
Boink, boink! Breather. Boink!
啪啪啪啪啪啪短暂的休息啪啪啪
Yeah, it's hot, and it's kinky,
是啊多么火♥辣♥ 多么的变♥态♥
and it's making the voices in your head stop.
这让你脑海中一切声音全都停息
But the next day, you wake up and he's gone.
但第二天你醒来时他已经走了
And, PS...
对了还有
you're pregnant.
你怀孕了
Yeah, Carol, I don't think any of those things
卡萝尔我觉得你说的这些
are gonna happen, especially that last part.
都不会发生尤其是最后一部分
Got it.
明白了
Oh, God, I don't know what you think you got,
天哪我并不觉得你明白了
but you might want to spend some of the brain time
但你大概会想要把你花在脑补上的时间
worrying about Tandy and that kid.
分一点出来关心一下坦迪和那个孩子
But they're doing great.
他们相处得很好啊
Jasper! Jasper!
贾思博贾思博
How dare you!
你好大的狗胆
Are they?
是吗
Jasper!
贾思博
We're not done here.
我们还没说完
He trusted you, Jasper!
他是如此相信你贾思博
Oh, don't worry, you're gonna be okay, okay?
别担心你会没事的好吗
How's it going, Tandy?
怎么了坦迪
Not well.
不好
He just needs a little air transfusion.
他需要输入空气
Look, I hate to kick you while you're down here,
听着我也不想在你伤心的时候说这些
but a lot of people are a little concerned
但大家都有点担心
that you might not have the aptitude to be a care giver.
他们担心你没有照顾别人的天分
Carol, I don't know what I'm doing wrong.
卡萝尔我不知道我做错了什么
I mean, I'm bending over backwards for this kid,
我真的拼了命的对那个孩子好
pulling out all the stops.
真的能做的我都做了
But he's just acting like a real LaFontaine.
但他就是表现得像个真的拉方登一样
Well, if he's misbehaving,
如果他的行为欠妥当
then maybe you got to do something about it.
那也许你得采取一些行动
Have you seen Mr. Holland's Opus?
你看过《霍兰先生的乐章》吗
No.
没有
Me, neither. I hear it's great.
我也没有我听说很棒
But that same year, there was another movie
但那同一年还出了另一部电影
that came out called Dangerous Minds.
叫做《危险游戏》
Oh, good, okay.
那挺好的
It's about a woman named Michelle Pfeiffer,
讲的是一个叫做米歇尔·菲佛的女人
who marches into an inner-city classroom,
她闯入了一间市中心的教室
and for the first time in the history of the world,
然后世界上有史以来第一次
she wins kids over with stern disciplinarianism.
她用钢铁般的纪律征服了学生
She just lets her hair down and puts on
她把头发放了下来
a tight-fitted leather jacket.
穿上了一件紧身皮夹克
She flips her chair around
她一把拉过椅子反坐着
and doesn't take any guff.
她不听信别人胡说八道
Do you see at what I'm getting?
你明白我的意思了吗
Look, I know you want to be a boy's man,
我知道你想跟小孩子套近乎
but I think right now,
但我觉得现在
you need to be a little bit more of a Michelle.
你更需要有点米歇尔的作风
Oh, I can be a Michelle.
我可以做到
Well, well, well, what do we got here, huh?
快看呐这是谁
So you think you're pretty cool, huh?
你以为你很酷吗
Mr. Tough Stuff?
硬汉先生