卡戴珊家族（2022）

The Kardashians S05E04

Part 5 March 11, 2025, 11:51 a.m.

逊妈妈
-[whispers] Cringe.
-[gasps] I'm a cringe mom?
我是逊妈妈？
你是诺丝二代吗？诺丝经常说我很逊
Are you the new North?
North says I'm so cringe.
我看起来像《GQ》年度风格男人吗？
-Do I look like the GQ Man of the Year?
-Probably.
-[♪ upbeat music playing]
-[camera clicking]
真酷
♪ Look at me ♪
♪ Hey ♪
我的小孩会说「加特」
意思就是说人屁♥股♥很大
My kids, they say "gyat"
and "gyat" means a big butt.
是我从TikTok上学来的
I got it off TikTok,
[chuckles]
害我觉得自己好老
and it was, like,
made you feel so old
因为我根本不知道年轻人的流行语
when you don't know what,
like, the slang words are.
♪ I'll make a splash ♪
♪ I'll mix it up ♪
♪ I'm feelin' bad ♪
♪ I'm feelin' young ♪
所以我就说
「各位，快迟到了，我们加特走了」
So, I was like,
"Guys, we're late. We've 'gyat' to go."
他们就说
-And they were like...
-[crew laughing]
「妈，妳好丢脸」
"Mom, you're so embarrassing!"
♪ Mirror, mirror on the wall ♪
我刚刚说了我讲「你加特离开」的故事
I just told the story how I'd said,
"You've 'gyat' to go."
（与诺丝通话）
我为什麽这麽逊？我为什麽这麽烦人？
Why am I so cringey?
Why am I so annoying?
首先呢，妳是因为说了那些话才逊
[North West] [over phone] First, you're so
cringey 'cause you're saying those words.
加特天啊
Gyat damn.
她挂我电♥话♥了
-[phone beeps, dial tone]
-Oh, she hung up on me.
我接下来要为了
跟施华洛世奇的联名商品去纽约
Next stop, I'm heading
to New York to my Swarovski collab
一定会很棒
and it's gonna be amazing.
♪ I think I'll try it on ♪
[♪ pensive music playing]
妳现在是兴奋还是紧张？状况如何？
Are you excited?
Are you nervous? What's happening?
我很紧张，因为我知道这很荒唐
I'm... nervous
'cause I know that this is crazy.
对，但这并不…妳还不用决定任何事
Yeah, but this is not--
You're not deciding anything.
我知道，但还是一样
-No, I know, but still.
-We're gonna just see how we feel
我们只是想先收集资讯，瞭解一下状况
once we gather information.
我今天要陪玛莉卡去精♥子♥银行
Today is the day that Malika and I
are going to a sperm bank
瞭解一下使用精♥子♥银行的流程
to get educated on
the whole sperm bank idea.
好，那间精♥子♥银行在哪裡？
Okay.
Where is the sperm bank?
[Malika laughs]
我不知道我为什麽以为这是停车位
I don't know why I thought
this was a parking spot.
我显然没开过车
Clearly I've never driven before.
好，我如果在裡面昏倒…
Okay, if I pass out while we're in here...
我虽然穿着全世界最短的裙子
但我没问题的
[sighs] Shortest skirt
in the world, but I got this.
（加州冷冻银行）
对，她本来打算穿黑白条纹开襟毛衣来
Yeah, she wanted to wear a [bleep]
black and white striped cardigan
我说：「不行，阴间大♥法♥师
妳得再用心打扮一点
to come here.
I said, "Come on, Beetlejuice.
"You've gotta spruce it up a little bit.
妳永远不知道自己会遇到什麽精♥子♥」
Ya never know what sperm
you're gonna run into."
嗨，你们好吗？
Hi, how are you?
我们很好，欢迎来到加州冷冻银行
Good.
Welcome to California Cryobank.
我们是为了玛莉卡而来的
Sh-- We're here for Malika.
妳们想问什麽问题都可以
Feel free to ask us any questions.
我们就跟你们走
-We'll follow you.
-Yeah. Excellent.
-好，谢谢
-太棒了
我们可以一边打桌球一边聊精♥子♥
Oh, and we could play ping-pong
and talk about sperm.
对，桌球、精♥子♥
Yes. Ping pong, sperm.
妳们得先换上订製服才能进实验室
[worker] You guys are gonna
get some couture to wear
while we head into the lab.
-谢谢
-我们会被什麽东西喷吗？
-[Malika] Thank you.
-Is something gonna splash on us?
-不会
-好
-Nope.
-Okay.
-我只是想确定，我想…
-妳们很安全
-[crosstalk]
-Just makin' sure. I was like...
不然会有点噁心
-You're very safe.
-I was like, "That's a little gross."
我觉得穿实验衣很棒
I actually respect a lab coat.
我想在精♥子♥银行注重卫生和受到保护
I would like cleanliness
protection at a sperm bank.
这些存库裡装着捐精者的精♥子♥
[lab tech] These are
the tanks with donor sperm.
That's what the--
how the sperm donors are labeled.
有好多捐精者
[Malika]
That's a lot of donor.
可以把盖子打开，然后就说
「嘿，你在裡面吗？」
You just lift the lid,
you're like, "Hey! Ya in there?"
好小，我还以为这种冷冻库会超级大
It's small. I thought these freezers
were, like, ginormous size.
可能是因为精♥子♥没那麽大
Sperm isn't that big, I guess.
你们希望我们坐哪裡？
-Where would you like us to sit?
-I think the two of you here,
妳们两位坐这边，才能看到电脑
-so you can see the computer...
-Nice.
还可以看一些捐精者
...so you'll have a chance
to look at some donors, too.
很好
-[laughs] Oh. Yeah!
-[softly] Oh, my God.
我猜大家可能会注重的是外表
[Khloé] I would imagine people
are going for your physical attributes
但我不知道这样的策略对不对
and I don't know if that's
the right way to go about it.
这可能是妳这一辈子
会做到最切身的选择之一，对吧？
This is one of the most personal choices
you may ever make, right?
所以妳一定要寻找吸引妳目光的对象
And so, you gotta see
what jumps out at you.
这些捐精者是白金级或银级
These donors are either,
uh, platinum or silver.
如果是白金级捐精者
So, the platinum donors,
妳就会是唯一
you would be the only person
that has access to those--
能取得他精♥子♥的人
to that donor's vials.
我觉得先看这种好了
I think we start there.
好
-Okay.
-We're, we're learning.
我们在学习新知识
谢谢
[Khloé]
Thank you so much.
选五呎八吋以上的好了
-Let's do 5'8" and taller? Okay.
-No. Yeah, that's, like--
好，就是…也排除掉六呎三吋以上的
Even six. Let's get rid
of 6'3" and whatever.
Oh.
这个宝宝好可爱
-Oh, that's a cute baby.
-Okay, let's look at him. He's 6'2".
好，我们来看看他，他是六呎二吋
非常棒
You better talk about it.
非裔美籍、法裔加籍、德裔、波兰裔
African American, French Canadian,
German, and Polish.
他小时候很可爱
He was really cute as a baby.
我们可以看到捐精者
从婴儿时期到两岁大的照片
[Khloé]
We can see the donor's photos
from infancy to, like, two years old.
但我完全不在乎你出生时长怎样
But I don't give a [bleep] what you
looked like when you were born.
「六呎二吋，身材健壮，辅♥导♥老师」
6'2", athletically built,
guidance counselor.
有好多加拿大人
Huh, it's a lotta Canadians.
-加拿大人和英国人
-对
Canadian and British people.
我喜欢英国人，加拿大人也很棒
-Yeah.
-I love British. And Canadians are nice.
他会打保龄球？
He's a bowler?
Hm. It's a no for me.
我不喜欢
「为人善良」
"Has a heart of gold."
他们怎麽会知道？因为我也可以随便讲