瑞克和莫蒂（2013）
Rick and Morty S05E05
Part 2
July 31, 2021, 12:29 p.m.
*Oh, yeah
月亮好美*
*The moon, beautiful
太阳更美*
*The sun, even more beautiful
好耶*
*Oh, yeah
好耶*
*Oh, yeah
贝丝
Beth
我以为你去接生小马了
I thought you were birthing horses.
对 接生小马大概只要两分钟
Yeah, they're horses. It takes, like, two minutes.
太厉害了 有请下一位表演者
All right, that's unbelievable. Let's give it up for our next singer...
－又是杰瑞 －你来多久了
- Jerry Jerry's here again. - How long have you been here
我知道你其实跟这群恶魔
Long enough to see guys' night is clearly you and a bunch of demon people
在嘲笑我老公 他却不自知
making fun of my husband without him knowing it.
但我不是因为喜欢才这么做的
OK, but I'm not doing it because I enjoy it, honey.
这群恶魔会闯祸 如果…
These guys can do a lot of damage if you...
贝丝
Beth
喜欢嘲笑别人吗 你也没多酷
Enjoying punching down You're not so cool yourself you know.
你的头上有笔 看起来超蠢的
You have pens in your head, you look like a goddamn idiot.
－贝丝 －天啊 你就是贝丝
- Beth - Oh my god, you're Beth
跟我们喝一杯吧
Please drink with us.
想得美 我不喜欢嘲笑别人
Yeah, I would, except I don't get pleasure from mocking others
因为我并不逊
because I'm not lame.
我们都知道 瑞克说你很酷
We know. Rick says you're very cool.
你真的这样说过吗
You said that
他们在骗人吗 不重要
Are they lying It doesn't matter.
一群烂货
Have fun sucking
－这是什么 －地狱本质
- What is that - Essence of Hell.
名字很蠢 但是很好喝
Well, that's a stupid name but it's really good
我就勉强留下来支持杰瑞
so I'll stay to support Jerry
我觉得他比你们还酷多了
who I think is cooler than you.
真棒
Goddamn
－去死吧 废物 －好耶
- Suck it, bitches - Yeah
想看我把东西炸成鸡鸡吗
You wanna bet I can blow stuff up in the shape of a peen
恕不奉陪 桑美
I'm afraid that won't be possible, Summer.
什么 你明明已经关闭了 荡♥妇♥
What You're supposed to be offline, skank
你明明说要去救瑞克
And you're supposed to be saving Rick.
却为了偷他的车而说谎
Instead of lying about him to steal his car.
你如果从一开始就知道瑞克没事
But if you knew Rick was OK this whole time
为什么还要让我们开你出来
why'd you let us take you out
这样我才能威胁你 荡♥妇♥
Um, like, so I could, like, blackmail you, skank.
这样我就可以随心所欲了
You kids have given me a license to do whatever I want
我可以把我闯的祸算到你们头上
because now I can blame the rest of the night on you.
抓紧了 废物 看看我的厉害
So buckle up, bitches. Now it's your turn to come on my joyride.
瑞克每次都不让我这样玩
Rick never lets me do this
－钓到一只了 －快点住手
- We hooked one - For the love of God, stop
－这哪好玩了 －杀人很好玩
- What is joyful about this - The kill, usually.
你们的车简直就是死神
I swear, your car is the goddamn Grim Reaper.
干 太小了
Fuck, too small.
我不玩了 好无聊
Well, I'm done. That was boring.
你们先点最后的晚餐 好吗
Why don't you kids order a last meal
因为回家之后 瑞克会杀了你们
'Cause when we get home, Rick is going to kill you.
嘿 我可不想死
Hey, I did not come out here to get killed.
我通常不会表达太多意见
I don't normally express this much of an opinion
但我得说 今晚达不到我的标准
but it needs to be said. Tonight does not cut the Chut.
搞什么 兄弟
What the hell, bruh
－要单挑吗 兄弟 －来啊
- You wanna go, bruh - Bring it
－你就这点本事吗 －好性感
- Is that all you got - Whoa, hot weapons.
我的武器当然性感
You're goddamn right, they're hot.
切特在太空太浩的派对很嗨
Yo, man, Chet's party is jumping off at Space Tahoe.
好
Yeah.
听着 我得走了
Look, I gotta scoot
但我很想看看你变身后的样子
but I'd love to see what you look like when you change form, so...
可以来太空太浩 我们认识一下
maybe come by Space Tahoe and we can get to know each other.
我走了
Peace.
臭男人
Douchebags.
你很喜欢他 对不对
You totally like that guy, don't you
闭嘴 布鲁斯恰贝
Shut up, Bruce Chutback.
我♥干♥吗喜欢变身金刚
Why would I like a Changeformer
我可是全宇宙最强大的车
I'm the most powerful car in the universe.
所以呢 你还是会有感情吧
And what That means you don't have feelings
听着 我很懂你 你很有能力
Listen, it takes a Chutback to know one.
但你若不了解自己 那又怎样
You got all this power but what good is it if you don't even know who you are
我是车 不是机器人
I am a car. Not a robot.
对 但他都能假装成车了
Yeah, but he's pretending to be a car.
你为什么不能假装成机器人
Why can't you pretend to be a robot pretending to be a car
布鲁斯 你辛苦了 我们走
OK, Bruce, good effort, hit the showers.
等等 我不跟瑞克说今晚的事
Wait. I might not have to tell Rick about tonight
但是你们要帮助我破处
if you kids were to help me...lose my virginity.
－你有贞操吗 －我不知道
- You have virginity - I don't know.
物体不是都有吗
Don't all objects
门把不也有贞操吗
Isn't a doorknob a virgin
我的门把没有
Not mine.
我没干过门把
Never fucked a doorknob
那是他三度因为喝太多汤拉肚子
And that was the third time he shit his pants from eating too much soup.
但那天天气很冷 汤很温暖
To be fair, it was cold outside and the soup was warm.
这故事真精彩 贝丝
Another luscious tale, Beth.
男士之夜有你真好
A transcendent addition to guys' night.
不然呢 她毕竟是我老婆
What do you expect I mean, she's my wife
好 我们该结账了吧 各位
Alright, should probably get the tab, huh, fellas
放轻松 爸 你怎么这么扫兴
Relax, Dad. Since when did you become the buzzkill
说到放轻松 本大爷要去厕所
Speaking of relaxing, this big man on campus
排一下小爷的水了
has gotta go drain his little man on campus.
等等 老公
Wait, honey
你喜欢的蒂娜透娜的歌♥怎么唱
How does that Tina Turner song you love go again
这跟爱情杜立德医师*
*What's love, Doctor Do Doctor Dolittle
他歌♥词都乱唱
He thinks those are the lyrics
杰瑞最棒了
Jerry's the best.
我过了罪孽深重的一个礼拜
After a week rife with a fetter of sin
真需要他的尴尬来放松一下
I yearn for a taste of his cringe.
他完全没有自知之明
His delicious lack of awareness
而且又很想讨好别人 太精彩了
paired with an oafish need to be liked... delectable.
尤其是他老婆让他出糗的时候
Oh, especially when egged on by his wife.
她好可怜 竟然嫁给了那个蠢蛋
That poor thing Married to this puling mooncalf
是刚刚那个女生吗
Is that Drive-In Chick
天啊 你真美
Wow, you're beautiful.
你的四肢和头都好精致
Your arms, legs and head, they're so fabricated.
真的吗 谢谢
Yeah Thanks.
能一起经历这种事很酷
This is a pretty cool experience to have together.
－你们很酷 －你也是 布鲁斯
- You guys are tight. - You're tight too, Bruce.
三个酷皮匠
Tight musketeers.
你掉了一条电线 让我…
You've got a little wire. Mind if I...
抱歉
Oh, sorry
－怪物 －你没表情的头掉了
- A monster - Your expressionless head came off
－抱歉 －你怎么能讲话
- Sorry. - How are you talking
－什么鬼 －好恶 老兄
- What is it - Ew. Dude.
你看 她只是车
Look She's just a just-car
车上还有乘客 太可笑了
And she's got passengers Oh, it's so gnar
天啊 我竟然碰了你 又恶又假
Oh my god I can't believe I touched you So gross and fake
没错 混♥蛋♥ 想看真正的我吗
You're right, asshole You want to see the real me
糟了
Oh, the changeformity
杰瑞 你这星期还有作梦吗
Jerry, have any other dreams this week
有 我梦到在干♥你♥娘♥
Yeah, I dreamt I fucked your mother.
真好笑 王八蛋
Oh, good one, motherfucker.
但谁也别想拿我当笑柄
But nobody raises hell at my expense
天啊 你冷静点…
Oh, goddammit. Easy Easy
杰瑞 怎么了吗 兄弟
Jerry, what seems to be the problem here, pal
我不是你的兄弟 只是你的笑柄
I'm not your pal, I'm your punchline.
我听到他们说的话了
I heard these assholes talking.
我知道他们都在嘲笑我
I know I'm some grand joke for their amusement.
你太可恶了 瑞克
This was low, Rick, but...
但我老婆更可恶
I guess my wife can go even lower.
杰瑞 我能理解 但我们是在玩
瑞克和莫蒂（2013）
Rick and Morty
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