瑞克和莫蒂（2013）
Rick and Morty S05E01
Part 2
June 22, 2021, 11:03 a.m.
但我们是白人
but we're white.
不许动 不许动
Freeze! Freeze! Freeze! Freeze!
打架
Fight.
做♥爱♥
Fuck.
离开 我们走
Flee. Let's get outta here.
-来吧 理查德 -他怎么
-Shall we, Richard? -Okay, but how did he --
天啊 杰瑞 他是宁波先生 他能控制警♥察♥
Jesus Christ, Jerry. He's Mr. Nimbus. He controls the police!
你们好 我有走错地方吗
Um, hello? Am I in the right place?
我刚刚看到一群警♥察♥在做♥爱♥
I just saw a bunch of cops having sex with each other?
杰西卡 你好
Hi! Jessica! Hi!
对 你没走错地方
Yeah, yup, y-you're in the right spot.
各位 这位是杰西卡
Uh, everyone, th-this is Jessica.
他们是我家人 这位是
This is everybody. Uh, this is --
我是宁波先生
I am Mr. Nimbus.
宁波 进来
Jesus, Nimbus, just get inside.
莫蒂 去拿酒
Morty, grab the wine.
好 等一下 进来吧 杰西卡
Yeah, in a minute. C-C'mon, Jessica.
让开
Stand aside.
除非你们配得上宁波
Unless you are worthy of Nimbus.
如果你指的是那个意思
If that means what I think it means,
我可以告诉你 我们会一起看片
I'll have you know, we watch porn together.
天啊 宁波先生对你们点头了
Wow, okay! Looks like you guys just got the nod.
点头
The nod?
宁波先生直觉很准
Mr. Nimbus has a sense for these things.
你们应该是性积极的夫妇吧
I take it you're a sex-positive couple?
对 非常积极
Oh, yeah. Very much so.
我们会一起看片
We watch porn together. Great!
很好 那我就帮你们登记三人行
I'll mark you down as eligible for a threeway.
这是相关资料
Here's all the information you'll need.
海王想跟我们三人行
The king of the ocean wants to have a threesome with us?
你们可以选择
Totally optional.
不过机会难得 我保证 我很嫉妒你们
But a remarkable option to have, I assure you. Very jealous.
最后一页有表单
There's a form on the last page
请填写收礼物篮的地址
so we know where to send the gift basket.
竟然有这种事
So that just happened.
你好像不排斥
You don't sound upset about it.
你也是
Neither do you.
天啊 我们真的遇到这种事
Oh, my God. Is this happening? To us?
我以为这种事只会在纽约或HBO上发生
I thought this only happened in New York or on HBO.
王医师一向都是对的
Dr. Wong hasn't been wrong yet.
没错
You're right.
这就是她想要我们做的事
This is exactly what she was talking about.
你可以当自己家
So, uh, yeah. J-Just make yourself comfortable.
选一部电影或是一起看
Y'know, ch-choose a movie or -- or we can watch
跨维度有线电视
some interdimensional cable if you want.
请继续收看任天堂69
We now return to "Nintendo 69."
任天堂 你在干嘛
Nintendo, oh, what are you doing to me?
任天堂
Oh, Nintendo, oh, Nin--
我们也可以看
Or we can watch whatever, y'know.
你想看的东西
Wh-Whatever you're into.
莫蒂 你是不是要负责拿酒
Morty, did I hear you're getting wine?
对 我得端酒给宁波先生
Yeah, I gotta get some wine for Mr. Nimbus.
有多的吗
Got any extra?
当然
Oh. Uh, yeah.
我可以拿来给你喝
Yeah, yeah, I'll go get some, just for you.
太好了 快点回来
Cool. Hurry back.
看来你好像需要帮忙
Looks like you could use a hand.
对 太好了
Oh, hey! Yeah, th-th-that'd be great.
-没问题 -小蹄 吃晚餐了
-No problem. Hoovy? -Dinner's ready!
我马上回来 宝贝
Be right there, sugar hoof!
我先帮年轻人把这些
Just helping this young man through a portal
放了好几十年的酒
with that crate full of alcohol
给搬过去
that's been here for decades.
谢了 小蹄 谢谢你的帮忙
Hey, thanks, Hoovy. I-I really appreciate that.
有个女生来我家 我很喜欢她
I-I got a girl over, and I really, really like her.
-我只是很紧张 -我懂
-I-I'm just nervous. -Oh, I know that feeling.
我刚开始跟波娃交往时
When I first started seeing Bova,
我满脑子都担心自己会搞砸
I could only think about all the ways I was gonna mess it up.
-后来怎么办的 -我搞砸了
-So what'd you do? -Oh, I messed it up.
但我找到了能接纳我这点的人
But I found the one who loves me for that.
谢谢 我需要你的鼓励
Thanks. I-I really needed to hear that.
-来 拿一瓶走吧 -不用了
-Here, -t-take one of these. -Oh, you don't have to.
不 我坚持 祝你有美好的一天 小蹄
No, I-I want to. You have a good day, Hoovy.
祝你跟那个女生玩得开心
You have a great time with that lady up there.
-放轻松 -没问题
-Just relax. -Will do!
波娃
Bova?
你为什么离开我们 爸爸
Why did you leave us, Father?
贾费 你什么时候出生的
Japheth? When were you born?
我向妈妈发过誓 只要遇到你
I swore to Mother if I ever met you,
就会为她复仇
I'd avenge her.
不是我的错
It wasn't my fault.
那是谁的错 是谁
Whose, then? Whose?!
从魔法门来的那个小男孩
The boy from the magic door.
我们来讨论条约内容 好吗
Shall we discuss terms?
好 没问题 内容如下
Yeah, fine. Whatever. Terms.
第一条 我是海王
Term number one -- I am King of the Ocean.
我拉屎的地方 继续
The place I shit? Go ahead.
第二条 别在海里拉屎
Term number two -- Stop shitting in the ocean.
我听不懂
No idea what you're talking about.
真好喝 再来一瓶
Delicious. Another.
我其实想拿这瓶
Oh, uh, well, I-I was thinking of using this one for --
莫蒂 快给他 天啊
Morty, just give him the bottle. God damn.
再来
Another!
莫蒂 拿到酒了吗
Morty, you get the wine?
杰西卡 抱歉
Hey, Jessica. Um, yeah, sorry.
我正要回去拿
I just -- just going back to get it.
你不是刚去了
Oh. I thought you already went.
对 但我有点事
I did! I just -- just got a little busy.
我现在再去一次
Going right now, again!
你先准备电影
You go ahead and fire up that movie!
没关系 我等你回来
That's okay. I'll wait for you.
天啊...
Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit, holy shit!
我等你好久了
I've been waiting for you.
天啊 你是小蹄 对吧
Oh, wow. Hoovy, right?
别说他的名字
Never say his name!
天啊
Jesus Christ!
为什么每个老人都这么壮
Why -- Why is every old guy super jacked?
抱歉
Sorry! I'm sorry!
我只是要拿酒 抱歉 住手
I-I just need the wine! I'm sorry! Stop it!
我要杀了你
Fucking kill you!
好吧 算了
Ow! Okay, screw this!
知道吗
You know what?
-是你 -对 去死吧小蹄
-You! -Yeah, fuck you, Hoovy!
爸爸
Father?
就是他 我就说他会再来 天啊
It's him! I told you he'd come back! Holy shit.
好 但他十秒钟前还没这么老
Okay, look, he wasn't old like 10 seconds ago.
你这个混♥蛋♥
Ow! Mother fucker!
对不起 爸爸 我们应该相信你的
I'm sorry, Father. I'm sorry we never believed.
他会回来的
He'll come back.
阻止他
Stop him.
爸爸 我们干嘛守门
Papa, why do we guard the gate?
因为黑暗之子总有一天会再来
Because one day, the dark child shall return.
而我们会做好准备
And we will be ready.
好吃
Delicious.
负责端酒的人呢 我好渴
Where is your wine boy, Richard? I thirst.
他去拿了 别这样吃贝奈特饼
He's getting it. Stop eating beignets like that.
一种法式无孔甜甜圈
"参与者若因高♥潮♥而死"
Participant voids all liability
"不得求偿"
in the event of death by orgasm?
我们真的要这样做吗
Are we really ready to open things this wide?
如果变得尴尬呢
瑞克和莫蒂（2013）
Rick and Morty
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