柏拉图关系（2023）

- Bye. - Bye. Love you, babe.
马桶
Toilet!
见鬼 该死 不
Fuck. Shit. No!
该死的
Fuck.
来了
Coming!
你来干什么
What are you doing here?
-人们称这种举动为“当英雄” -我没时间跟你说这些
- They call it "being a hero." - I don't have time for this.
我是一个伟大的人 他们会写关于我的歌♥
I am a great man. They will write songs about me.
-你在干什么 -我需要你的帮助 你能进来吗
- What are you doing? - I need your help. Can you come in here?
我能拿点这些牛油果吗
Can I grab some of these avocados?
天啊
Oh, God.
我向你保证 这只有水
I promise you, it's just water.
-是吗 好吧 -让它停下来
- Oh, yeah? Okay. - Make it stop.
我不知道怎么让它停下来
I don't know how to make it stop.
这可不好
That ain't good.
是你干的吗 你把马桶弄堵了
Did you do this? Was this you?
-你能先帮我修好吗 -可以
- Could you just fix it? - Yep.
好了
There you go.
-谢谢 感激不尽 -搞定了 拖把在哪
- Thank you. Thank you so much. - There you go. Where's your mop?
在厨房♥里 但是你不用帮我拖地
It's in the kitchen. But you don't have to do that.
没事 酒保60%的工作就是拖地
It's fine. Like 60% of bartending is mopping.
谢谢 你不必这么做
Thank you. You don't have to do that.
你家很漂亮 非常温馨舒适
Your house is very lovely. Very homey.
你是说很小吧
You mean small.
不 我是说很有家的感觉
No, I mean very homelike.
天啊 他的iPad在这呢
Oh, my God. There's his iPad.
秘密iPad 有人在看色情片吗
Secret iPad. Someone watching porno?
-他才八岁 -又怎样
- He's eight. - And?
我八岁的时候就很可恶了
When I was eight, I was disgusting.
-别放在那里面 恶心 -为什么
- Don't put that in there. That's gross. - Why?
-为什么放里面会恶心 -因为人们躺在里面
- Why is that gross? - Because people lie down in there.
-不恶心 马桶的水可以喝 -你还可以做很多事呢
- Not gross. You can drink toilet water. - You could do a lot of things.
-没错 渴吗 -请把这个拿...
- Exactly. Thirsty? - Please take that--
你想吸这些线吗
You wanna suckle on the threads?
清理好这里后你想做什么 想去海滩吗
What do you wanna do after this? You wanna go to the beach?
吃点牡蛎 想去看场电影吗
Get some oysters? Wanna go see a movie?
去不了 我很忙 实际上我要去出价买♥♥一栋房♥子
I can't. I'm busy. I'm putting an offer in on a house, actually.
是啊 最后再查一遍房♥子 然后就出价
Yeah. After I do the final walk-through.
不错 这地方怎么了
Nice. What's wrong with this place?
空间不够了 对我们五个人来说 这里太小了
We've outgrown it. It's too small for the five of us.
只有一个卫生间 这...还...淹水
There's one bathroom. It's-- And-- Which is flooding.
-跟我说说那个新房♥子 -很棒
- Tell me about the new place. - It's great!
那房♥子 有待修缮 还需要做些工作
It's, you know, fixer-upper. Needs a bit of work.
-我能和你去看♥房♥♥吗 -不行
- Can I come on the walk-through? Please. - No.
求你了 其实我很擅长装♥修♥
Please. I'm actually very good with renovations.
-何时起 -酒吧大部分装♥修♥都是我做的
- Since when? - I redid most of the bar by myself.
真的
Really?
是 我们刚买♥♥的时候 那里还是个宰鸡场
Yeah. It was a chicken slaughterhouse when we got it.
-不可能 -真的
- Get out. - Yeah.
-天啊 -我们还能找到羽毛和喙呢
- Wow. - We still find feathers and beaks.
我知道 不过说真的 我能去吗 我会帮忙 我保证
I know. Seriously, though. Can I come? I'll be very helpful, I promise.
好吧 别说话就行
Okay. Just don't talk.
-我不会 -别...
- I won't. - Don't--
别跟我或任何人说话
Just don't talk to me or anybody.
-闭上嘴 很好 -对
- No talking. Perfect. - Nope.
你多久见一次奥黛丽
So, how often do you see Audrey?
说不好 每隔几周吧
I don't know. Every few weeks.
我还有一堆东西没从房♥子中搬走
I still have a bunch of stuff I haven't moved out of the house.
所以我会定期回去拿点东西
So, you know, I'm periodically going back there to get some shit.
什么 为什么
What? Why?
只不过...搬家要花很长时间
Just-- You know. Takes a long time to move.
你一天就能搞定的
You can do it in a day.
不仅仅是东西 甘道夫还在那里
It's not just the stuff, you know. Gandalf is still there.
-甘道夫归奥黛丽了 -是的
- Audrey has Gandalf? - Yeah.
但它最开始是你的 你爱那只蜥蜴
But he was yours first. You love that lizard.
我仍爱甘道夫 只不过...她坚持要养
I still love Gandalf. It's just-- She insisted on keeping him
因为她觉得我没有足够的责任感来照顾它
'cause she didn't think I was responsible enough to take care of him.
这太荒谬了
Well, that's ridiculous.
它就像你蜥蜴版的儿子 你应该拥有监护权
He's like your son in lizard form. You should have custody.
我有共同监护权 因为我经常去看它
I have joint custody, 'cause I go see him all the time.
怎么了
What?
-怎么了 你可以告诉我 说吧 -没什么 我只是...不知道
- What? You can tell me. Tell me. - Nothing. I just-- I don't know.
如果你们的生活仍然纠缠不清 那很难从离婚中走出来
It's hard to recover from a divorce if your lives are still totally entwined.
离婚是件很麻烦的事 又不是某天你们结婚了
Well, divorce is a messy thing. It's not like one day you're married,
第二天你们就再也不会见面了
the next day you never see each other again.
你是否想过 你把自己的东西留在那边
Have you ever thought that you leave your stuff there
而她还留着甘道夫 这样你们俩就能保持联♥系♥了
and she keeps Gandalf so you two can stay connected
让这场闹剧或什么的继续下去吗
and keep this drama or whatever it is alive?
既然你提到了 我们的争论非常令人兴奋
Now that you mention it, our arguments are pretty thrilling.
它们通常会导致性行为
And they often lead to sex.
就是这样 你知道答案了
There you go. There you have it.
非常令人兴奋的事
Very exciting stuff.
不用说了 谢谢
No, thank you.
-我们说的是引起性♥欲♥的争论 -别说了 谢谢
- We're talking charged fights. - No, thank you.
-千万别说了 不 -你觉得恶心吗
- Absolutely not. Nope. - Is that gross to you?
-别说我喜欢的东西恶心 -别说了
- Don't "yuck" my yum. - Stop.
那么 跟我说说这个房♥子 这房♥子什么情况
So, tell me about this home. What are we talking about here?
-它的结构和地基很好 -好
- It's got really good bones. - Okay.
有更大的空间 还有一个游泳池
Bigger, square footage. There's a pool.
太好了 是要彻底拆了重盖
Great. Is it, like, a full teardown?
还是说是只需要翻新一下
Just, like, a kind of a renovation-type deal?
不是真的要拆重盖或翻新
It's not really a teardown or a flip.
那是...
It's a...
它以前是一个辅助生活房♥
It's a former assisted living facility.
新冠疫情后关闭了
Closed after COVID.
-肯定是 -你去死啦 闭嘴吧
- I bet it did. - Fuck you. Fuck off.
好的
Uh-huh.
(花♥园♥谷辅助生活中心)
-只是有点不同 好吧 是 -有趣 等不及要看了
- Just a little bit different. Okay? Yeah. - Interesting. Can't wait to see.
-嗨 -嗨
- Hi. - Hi.
-你来啦 很高兴见到你 -嗨 很高兴见到你
- You made it. So glad to see you. - Hi. Nice to see you.
你一定是查理 终于啊
And you must be Charlie. At long last.
-嗨 -很高兴终于见到你了
- Hi. - It's so nice to finally meet you.
-不是 -嗨 不是
- No. - Hi. No.
-这是威尔 他是我的承包商 -我是威尔 对 我是承包商
- This is Will. He's my contractor. - I'm Will. Yeah. I'm a contractor.
-太棒了 很高兴你能来看 -专业承包商
- Great. Glad you came to have a look. - Professional contractor.
他还是儿童频道一个电视节目的 主持人 叫《我们在拼搏》
And he's also the host of a TV show on Nickelodeon called "We Be Jammin'."
-没错 -天啊
- Uh-huh. - Oh, my goodness.
我们用雷鬼音乐教孩子们自信
And we teach children to be confident using reggae.
没听说过 我得去了解一下
Haven't heard of it. Have to check it out.
查理今天不能来 他工作太忙了
Charlie couldn't come today. He was just too slammed at work.
-所以...是 -这房♥子很漂亮
- So-- Yeah. - This house is gorgeous.
-不可思议 -是的
- Unbelievable. - Yeah.
-这个“扶屁” 这个...所有这些 -是
- The "buttrels." The-- All of this. - Yeah.
那...那些 细节
The-- These details.
哪...那个...1926年 显然是
What-- The-- 1926, obviously?
- 1986 -我正想说呢
- 1986. - That's what I was gonna say.
-很接近 -它有50年的周期 要知道...
- Close. - It's got the 50-year cycle. You know--
那么 房♥子的内部是...
So, the interior of the house is--
-我想会有550平方米 -是325平方米
- 6,000 square feet, I would imagine? - It is 3,500 square feet.
-不 我表示怀疑 -但是...
- Meh, I don't know about that. - But--
-你确定吗 -是的
- You sure? - Oh, yeah.
不如我们量量 我来估算
Why don't we check that? I'll eyeball it.
-是 地块550平♥米♥ -是 我们估算下
- Yeah. The lot is 6,000. - Yeah, we'll eyeball it.
所以说 它看上去有550平♥米♥
So, it presents as a 6K there.
进来看看吧 我们将进行第四次
Come on in and see it. We're gonna do our fourth,
希望是最后一次检查
and hopefully final, walk-through.
-来吧 -赞美耶♥和♥华♥
- Come on! - Praise Jah.
-看这个 -是
- Look at this. - Yeah.
你有七个棋盘 这可不好找 即使是在现在
And you got seven chess boards, which is not easy to find. Even now.
所以要记住 这全部重装♥修♥过 是的
So, keep your mind clear, this is a whole remodel. Yes.