加州靡情（2007）

Ooh,I really...I think we need to examine what you're getting out of this thing.
哦 我真的...觉得我们得好好合计 你要怎么弄我的鸡鸡
Hey...
嘿...
Hank!
Hank!
Hi,you must be Carrie.
嗨 你一定是Carrie
So...
那么...
Am I gonna like this gal or what?
我会喜欢这个姑娘吗?
She's very nice.
她很不错
Okay,just so you know,"She's very nice--"
好吧 我得说 "她很不错"
Sounds like a weight problem.
听起来她会很肥
You said you wanted to meet someone nice.
你说过你想认识个好姑娘
You said a normal woman.And she is the nicest,most normal woman I know in all of Los Angeles.
一个正常的女人 她绝对是我在 洛杉矶认识的所有人里最正常的了
Okay,okay,I just-- I hate blind dates.
好吧 好吧 我只是--讨厌相亲
The worst. I could stay home.
最坏的情况了 我可以待在家里
Hey,we could watch a movie or something.
嘿 我们可以看个电影什么的
Right,that. Yes,that.
不合适哦 Charlie 对哦 对
You didn't tell her about my inappropriate behavior,did you?
你不会跟她说过我一些不好的事吧?
Yes,I told her that you shoved your hand up mt skirt
我跟她说你把手伸进我的衣服
and started talking like a sexual deviant.
然后说起话来像个性变♥态♥
What did she say? I'm kidding,Charlie.
她怎么说? 我开玩笑的 Charlie
I was trying to talk you up,not have you arrested.
我一直给你说好话 我不想让你被抓起来
Okay,okay,okay. So,uh,if Stewart wakes up--
好吧 好吧 好吧 如果Stewart醒了--
I've got it covered. I've got the touch.
我会照顾的 我心里有数
Yes,you do. Okay.
是的 你都知道 好吧
Any advice? Just be yourself,Charlie.
有什么建议吗? 做你自己就好了 Charlie
And who is that,exactly?
那是啥样?
I'd like to propose a toast to the bravest,most erotic book I have ever read.
我想大家举杯 敬我读过 最大胆最色情的书
Blood Mountain,by Richard Bates.
血山 作者Richard Bates
Eh-eh-eh-eh- that's exactly what you said about "Fucking and Punching," word for word.
呃呃呃 你也这么夸过"又干又掐" 那书
And I meant it,Hank.
我是说过 Hank
No,I did.I did. It doesn't make it any less true.
我是这么说的 的确是这样的
All right,well,here's to bending over and taking it.
好吧 我屈膝了 敬你
Hollywood style. Oh,my God.
好莱坞式的敬酒 哦我的天
And this from the 19th writer on Santa Monica Cop.
第19个写Santa Monica Cop的作家
Aah,douche,my friend,douche.
啊 混球 我的朋友 你个混球
Kiss me,you supercilious fuck.
来亲我啊 你个高傲自大的小子
So Carrie,I have to ask. Yes,Karen.
Carrie 我要问问你 问吧 Karen
How did you manage to nail down Hank for--
你是怎么把Hank栓了有--
It's a year,right? Almost a year,yeah.
有一年是吧? 差不多了 对
Yeah,well,I would love to say it was me,but I think it was the sex.
是啊 我是很想说是我迷住了他 不过我觉得是肉体栓住了他
He unleashed something in me,you know?Something primal.
他在我体内释放了什么东西 你知道吗? 一些很原始的东西
Before Hank,it was just me and that little pink rabbit.
在Hank之前 就只有我和我的粉色 小兔子
Yeah,where is that pink rabbit today? Sex toys.
今天你的粉色小兔子呢? 情趣用具啦
What's the consensus? Oh,my God.I love them.
有没有人同意? 哦 我的天 我爱死了
Could we just pretend to talk about politics or the environment or--
我们就不能假装谈谈政♥治♥或是环境
and then,maybe,you know,end up with sex?
然后 最后可能以性话题收场?
Karen,Karen,we're all grown-ups here.
Karen Karen 在座的都是成年人了
No,we're not. Karen hates talking about sex.
不 不是呢 Karen不喜欢说这些
She ain't gonna do it. I do not.
她会受不了的 我才不会
Okay,you guys wanna see something? Here we go.Sex.
好 你们想看好玩的吗? 开始 做♥爱♥
No. Vagina.Pussy.
没事啊 阴♥道♥ 阴门
Big hairy pussy!
毛发旺盛的大阴门!
You know what? I used to be that way.I did.
你知道吗? 我以前也是这样 真的
I was really closed off. I was borderline frigid,actually.
我很封闭的 到某一点我就很冷淡
No,no,no,I'm not saying-- but Hank,he opened me up.
不 不 不 我不是说-- 可是Hank打开了我
He doesyes,yeah. He did.
他真的是的 是的 他是会
Emotionally and creatively. Yup,yeah,that's me.
充满感情和新意地打开了我 是吧 好吧 这就是我
The emotional safecracker.
感情小偷
Well,for what it's worth,I find Karen to be...
说句公道话 我发现Karen是...
Shut up.
闭嘴
Easily the most sexual woman I've ever had the good fortune to copulate with.
是我有幸交♥配♥过最让人有欲望的女人
Holy crap. Wow,well,that's She's quite ferocious,actually.
扯蛋 嗯 她可是很野性的
Like a lioness.
像一只母狮
I wanna go and put my head in the oven.
我想把自己的头放到烤箱里去
Will you save room for me?
给我也留个位子?
The reason I brought this up was because I like the toys.
我提这个是因为我喜欢那些用品
Marcie not so much.
Marcie不太喜欢
It's not that I don't like them,okay?
不是我不喜欢好吗?
It's just that the noise takes me out of the game.
就是那种声音让我很扫兴
It's that...
就是...
Or... Whatever.
要么就是... 还有
Okay,so I tried to control the noise factor
好吧 我有试过改善噪音问题
by suggesting that perhaps we incorporate something quieter.
所以建议我们用点安静的
Dildo,perhaps. Uh,she balks.
比如说人造阴♥茎♥ 可是她缩了
Baby,why would I need a dildo when I have you?
亲爱的我都有你了干嘛要用那个?
Well,that's nice. That's crazy.
那个很不错啊 你真是疯了
I mean,back in the Runkle era,however...
要是回到以前和Runkle的时候 那...
I really could have probably benefitted from something with some girth,
说不定我还真用得上那些长一点的
some-- just fold it over a couple of times,something!
那些--能绕个好几圈的!
Don't speak ill of my boy when he's not here to defend himself.
别在我的宝贝不在的时候说他坏话
Innocent until proven diminutive.
除非有证据才能证明
That's what I would say. You fill me up,baby.
我就是想这么说 你让我充实 亲爱的
That is exactly how I feel about Hank.
我对Hank就是这种感觉
Oh,Jesus. He fills me up.
哦天哪 他让我充实
Carrie,come on,just What?We're talking.
Carrie 别 怎么了? 大家都在说
We're all talking frankly about sex.
大家都很坦诚地在谈这个
Yes,but it's not encounter group.
是 可这不是交心心理小组
You don't have to talk quite so frankly.
你没必要这么坦诚
That's all right,Carrie,I'll talk frankly about sex.
你说得对 Carrie 我能坦诚地说
Yeah,I'll talk frankly about dildos.I'm no stranger.
我能坦诚地谈论人造阴♥茎♥ 我可不陌生
A man's anus is an erogenous zone. Oh,my God.
男人的肛♥门♥也让人非常有欲望 哦 我的天
There's certainly nothing gay about having one's prostate stimulated.
让别人的老二站起来也不是搞基
Oh,is that right?Sounds pretty gay to me,Batesy.
哦 是吗? 我觉得就是搞基啊 Batesy
Sounds about as gay as Tom Hanks in a white sailor's outfit.
就像Tom Hanks穿白色水手服一样基
I don't see it that way,Hank.
我不这么看 Hank
You've inserted a dildo into this man's gaping bunghole?
你拿假老二插到这个家伙 张开的黑洞里去了?
Oh,you know me.
哦 你知道我的
I don't know if I'm proud of you or ashamed or just sad for humanity or maybe all three,I don't know.
我真不知道我是为你自豪呢羞耻呢 还是为人性悲哀呢 还是以上皆是
If the truth be known,no she hasn't. She's not comfortable with it.
如果说事实的话 她没有 她不是很适应
Thank you.
谢谢你
And I'm not comfortable with anything my bride's not comfortable with.
我也不会适应我的新娘不适应的事
That's nice,that's nice. Oh,that's nice.
你真好 你真好 哦 你真好
Besides,that was a long time ago.
而且那也是很久以前的事了
Boundaries were pretty blurry back then.
那时候的界限并不清晰
Oh,yeah,that was the gay '90s,huh?
哦 是啊 那可是基情的90年代啊?
It seems like it was raining cock back then,was it?
感觉那时候天上都在下鸡鸡是吧?
Hey,I would do that for you.
嘿 我会为了你那么做的
I would stimulate your prostate with pride and zero prejudice.
我会自豪没有偏见地刺♥激♥你的老二
That's really sweet of you,thank you.
你真是太好了 谢谢你
Oh,come on,Hank. You've never experimented?
哦 得了 Hank 你从来没试过吗?
No circle jerks? No towel snapping incidents?
集体手♥淫♥? 互相戏弄?
Sword fights,perhaps?
鸡鸡对打?
That was a pretty big one.
那个真的很长
Hm? What?
嗯?什么?
That silence. That incredibly awkward silence.
沉默的时间 极度尴尬的沉默
It's our third of the night,you know?
我们已经第三次出来了你知道吗?
Really? Uh,I wasn't counting.
是吗? 啊 我没数
But you know what? I really think awkward silences get a bad rap.
可你知道么? 我觉得尴尬的沉默时节奏也很烂
Because,uh,who really has that much to say?
因为 呃 谁能有那么多话题呢
Don't worry,you don't have to make excuses. I'm sure it's my fault.
别担心 你不用找理由 是我的错
Don't be silly. I'm not being silly.
别傻了 我没有
I just-- I'm out of practice.
我只是 不太熟练
I haven't been out on a proper date in a long time.
我很长时间没有正式约会过了
Tell me about it.
说来听听
Well,he took me to medieval times,but the guy was a little handsy.
他把我带回了中世纪 那人控制欲有点儿强
I mean,he just kept putting his hand up my skirt during the jousting,
他在长枪比武大赛的时候一直 把手放在我的裙子上
which would have been fine.
那很好
It's just that,you know,you eat with your hands.
只是 你知道 你用手吃饭
And he'd been really fingering his chicken.
他用手抠鸡吃
Okay.
好吧
Four and counting.
抠来抠去