大城小妞（2014）

Broad City S02E09

Part 3 Oct. 14, 2020, 10:08 a.m.

I hope it wasn't too much trouble.
希望没太麻烦到你
No, it was the perfect amount of troubles.
没有没太费劲就找到了
So much fun.
过程很有意思
Whoa, Bed Bath and Beyond coupons.
BBB优♥惠♥券
Yeah, I practically live there.
我可以说是在那生活
That's my favorite store.
那是我最爱的商店
You want a drink?
你想喝点什么吗
Yeah. I'd-- yeah.
好啊
Mark had to take the kids to Telluride
马克带孩子去特拉莱德
for a capoeira festival, so...
参加卡波耶拉舞蹈节了
I love a cappella.
我喜欢无伴奏合唱
Hey, will you do me a favor? Can you take your shoes off?
那个你能把鞋脱了吗
Um, sure.
当然
Put on a pair of those.
穿那个
We're a shape-ups family.
我们家都穿塑形鞋
You a 28hh?
你穿28HH罩杯的
Yeah, you got it.
是的
Weird. Me too.
怪了我也是
You know, Kelly, I gotta say, your apartment is beautiful.
凯莉我得说你的公♥寓♥真是很漂亮
Oh, thanks.
谢谢
It's rent controlled.
这是房♥租管制公♥寓♥
I only pay 600 bucks a month.
我一个月只交600
Really?
真的吗
Of course not! Prank!
当然不是恶作剧
I love pranks!
我喜欢恶作剧
Oh, my.
天啊
I can't believe we finished a whole bottle already.
我们竟然已经喝完了一整瓶
That's okay.
没事
I've been meaning to crack open a special batch.
我一直想要开一瓶特别的
Here you go.
尝尝
Whoa, what is that?
什么啊
Moonshine!
私酒
Oh, my god.
天啊
Do we have the same exact tattoo?
我们的文身是一样的吗
No, that's your arm.
不那是你的手臂
Oh, right. Right, right, right.
对哦对对对
Strahan keeps sending me all these gift baskets
斯特拉恩不停给我寄这些礼品篮子
to butter me up because he wants to switch sides
想要讨好我因为他想换边
and everybody knows, first of all, that I sit camera left.
但大家都知道我坐摄像机的左边
Everyone knows that.
大家都知道
Everybody knows.
大家都知道
You know what I think about sitting camera right?
你知道我对坐在摄像机右边有什么看法吗
I'll show you-- this--
我给你看看
I'll show you what I think about sitting camera right right now.
我给你看看我对坐在摄像机右边的看法
Oh, , dude! That's the street! Oh, !
我去那是街道啊我去
I gotta take a whiz.
我得去尿尿
And I'll tell you what, when I get back,
这样等我回来
I wanna see that big-ass mother basket
我要看到那个大篮子
down next to my little-ass mother basket.
扔到我的小篮子旁边
Are you kidding?
你是在开玩笑吗
Okay.
好了
Could we turn off the lights maybe?
我们能把灯关了吗
Oh, but I wanna see your cute little face.
可我想看你可爱的脸
Cool.
酷
Uh, okay. One second.
好吧等下
Okay.
好了
Okay, that's better.
好多了
Holy .
我靠
Abbi!
艾比
What a beautiful kitchen!
厨房♥真漂亮
Thanks.
谢谢
What, uh, what, uh Oh, don't worry.
那是什么别担心
It'll just give us trippier visuals.
这只会让我们更迷糊
Buckle up, buttercup.
做好准备宝贝
You only live once, right?
人只活一次对吧
Yes, queen.
棒女王
Yes, queen.
棒女王
Yes, queen.
棒女王
Yes, queen.
棒女王
Oh, my god.
天啊
Stop. Stop, stop, stop, stop.
停下停下
What's wrong? Too much teeth?
怎么了牙齿咬太多次了吗
No, the biting was dope.
不那个很棒
I just...
只是
It's too weird.
太奇怪了
What's too weird? Okay.
什么太奇怪好吧
I wanna put this delicately
我就简单说吧
'cause I don't want to freak you out too much,
因为我不想你抓狂
But it came to my attention that
但我意识到
we look exactly alike.
我们长得一模一样
Yeah, no .
废话
You knew?
你早就知道
I'm not blind, I mean,
我不是瞎子
isn't that why you approached me in the first place?
这难道不是你当初找我的原因吗
No.
不是
I was drawn to your aura.
我是被你的光环吸引了
And your scent, you know.
还有你的味道
And your curls and your cheeks.
你的卷发你的脸颊
Of course I'm drawn to myself.
我当然要被自己吸引了
I masturbate in the mirror!
我对着镜子自♥慰♥
Me too!
我也是
That's what's so hot about it.
这正是其性感之处
It's like hooking up with yourself.
就像跟自己约炮一样
I know, but--
我知道可是
I have sex with people different from me, you know?
我和不同于我的人滚床单
Different colors, different shapes, different sizes.
不同肤色不同体型不同尺寸
People who are hotter, uglier.
更性感更丑
More smart, not more smart.
更聪明不更聪明
Innies, outies.
阴♥唇♥外翻和不外翻的
I don't know-- a catholic person.
天主教♥徒♥
Nobody knows our bodies the way that we do.
没人像我们一样了解我们的身体
Look.
听着
Your g spot...
你的G点
is right here.
在这里
Too intense. Too intense.
太强烈了太强烈了
Oh, my god.
我的天
I lost my vision.
我看不到了
Yeah, for a second.
有那么一秒钟
I don't know though.
我说不好
I don't know. It's like, creepy to me.
我觉得这很瘆人
I'm sorry.
抱歉
That's lame, but yeah.
真没说服力不过好吧
Listen.
听着
We should still stay in touch
我们还是该保持联♥系♥
for organ donation or jury duty.
万一以后需要器官捐献或者有陪审团义务
You want?
你想抽吗
Oh, no.
不
I don't smoke pot.
我不抽大♥麻♥
I gotta say, like, you're much wilder than I...
我得说你比我想象中还
You're, like, much wilder than I thought you were.
你比我想象中还放荡
Like, I didn't know.
我没想到
I know a lot of people think that
我知道很多人这么想
because I'm on the "Morning show"
因为我主持的是《晨间秀》
That I have to be like, America's good girl.
我得假装是美国的好女孩
Totally.
当然
And I'm just like, at this place in my life
我现在在我的人生里
where I've accomplished a lot.
已经完成了很多事
So much, man.
太多了
Yeah. I literally don't even give any .
我已经完全不在乎了
Like, I hate .
我讨厌死