大城小妞（2014）

Broad City S02E06

Part 1 Oct. 14, 2020, 10:07 a.m.

excuse me.
抱歉
Excuse me!
打扰一下
Hey... Excuse me.
打扰一下
Excuse me!
停一下好吗
You guys sound so good.
你们打得很不错
I'm a record producer, and I've been looking for two drummers
我是唱片制♥作♥人我在为我创办的一个项目
for a project that I'm starting.
寻找两个鼓手
Oh my god.
我的天
This is it. Are you serious?
就是这个了你认真的吗
No, I'm not serious.
不我开玩笑的
I work here, and I need you guys to leave.
我在这工作需要你们离开
Time to go.
时间到了
Four!
四
I love "Scarface," Dude.
我喜欢《疤面煞星》姐们
We just watched that.
我们才看过
Cocaine and incest, baby. Can't get enough
可♥卡♥因♥和乱♥伦♥ 宝贝永远都看不尽兴
Wait, what about "Food, inc."?
等等看《食品公♥司♥》怎么样
That's supposed to be like really life-changing and eye-opening
据说会改变人的生活并且让人♥大♥开眼界
and like a really important film to see
这是一部很重要的电影
about where our food comes from and stuff.
讲的是我们的食物是从哪来的
And then the whole corn issue.
还有有关玉米的问题
Sometimes it's the less you know, though... You know?
有时你知道的越少...你知道的吧
No.
也对
Dude, I wonder what kind of food
姐们我想知道
they're going to have at the dog wedding today
他们会在今天的狗狗婚礼上吃什么
Let's watch the e-vite again.
我们再看一遍电子请帖吧
Yeah!
好啊
I love it!
好喜欢
It really is a masterpiece.
这真的太棒了
Oh my god.
天啊
Why is that shot in there?
为什么会有那个镜头
It's animated, it didn't need to be in there at all.
这是动画完全不需要的
Not to be like a downer
我也不想扫兴
but did you know that people steal people's dogs
三你知道有人偷狗
and then sell them?
然后再把它们卖♥♥了吗
There's a "Judge Judy" Episode about that where this guy is
《法官朱迪》上有一集就是
like reunited with his dog, who was taken.
有个人的狗狗被偷走了然后又和它团聚
Yes, baby boy! Yes!
小乖乖是啊
Wait, is "Judge Judy" Still on right now?
等等《法官朱迪》还在播吗
We should watch that.
我们应该看看
Holy , dude.
天啊姐们
"Judge Judy" ran for 18 seasons.
《法官朱迪》播了十八季
Jesus christ!
上帝啊
Judge Judy's net worth is...
《法官朱迪》的净值是...
... dollars.
...美元
Wait, keep that face.
别动保持这个表情
Oh, so good.
太棒了
I'm gonna 'gram it.
我要发到Instagram上去
No filter. All right, fine.
不要滤镜好吧
What's up, my queen?
怎么了我的女王
Jesus, I forgot you were in the room!
上帝啊我忘了你在房♥里
Holy , dude, how did we forget that we were here together?
天啊姐们我们怎么会忘了我们在一起呢
What is wrong with us?
我们怎么了
I feel like I blacked out.
我感觉我昏过去了
We were so tapped into the worldwide bloodstream
我们沉迷于网络世界
we fell into the lint roll matrix.
掉进了粘毛棒虚拟世界
What time is it?
几点了
Oh god.
天
All right, we need to go outside for real
我们需要去外面
and live like normal people.
像正常人一样生活
Let's just get dressed and go to the wedding.
我们打扮一下去参加婚礼吧
Dude, can you imagine if we left our phones here?
姐们你能想象我们把手♥机♥留在这会怎么样吗
We would be totally off the grid.
我们会完全离开网络
It would be like breathing air for the first time.
就像第一次呼吸空气一眼
Right?
是吧
It's like all we do is wake up, sign in and...
我们只会起床登入然后...
We are plugged into the matrix all day.
整天都沉迷于虚拟世界
Gmail, Grindr, Facebook, Facetime, Insta, Grindr
Gmail, Grindr, Facebook, Facetime, Insta, Grindr
Tumblr, Twitter, Dlisted.
Tumblr, Twitter, Dlisted
Jesus christ!
上帝啊
And then we have to rip the plug out to go to sleep
然后我们得拔掉插头才会去睡觉
rub one out, rinse and repeat.
撸一发每天都这样反复
We have these auto-responses programmed--
我们设置了自动回复...
Hello?
喂
Hey, what up, Ilana?
你好吗阿♥拉♥娜
Hey, boy, what up?
你好吗
Do you know if your brother's wearing a tie to the wedding today?
你知道你弟弟今天要打领带去参加婚礼吗
Dude, I'm not my brother's keeper.
哥们我不是我弟弟的管家
I'm just trying to gauge the dress code.
我只是想搞清着装要求而已
I don't want to be overdressed
我不想穿得太过
but I really don't want to be underdressed.
也不想穿得太随便
You think a dog tie is too on the nose?
你觉得狗图案的领带太过了吗
No, it's perfect.
不啊很完美
You look great in themed clothing.
你穿主题类的衣服简直棒呆了
Thank you.
谢谢
And... I'm not patronizing you
我没有瞧不起你的意思
but did you remember the rings?
但是你还记得戒指吗
Well, not to "patronize" you,
我也没有瞧不起你的意思
but of course I have the rings.
我当然有戒指
They're on Abbi's toes.
在艾比的脚趾上
See you there.
在那见
Top dog. Later.
老大待会见
Welcome to another installment of "How to" with Dr. Whiz.
欢迎收看《如何跟着维兹博士学穿衣》
Today I'm gonna show you how to tie a windsor knot.
今天我会教你们如何打温莎结
Let's begin.
让我们开始吧
Take the little guy and place him in front of your neck.
把细的一边放在你衣领前面
Clap if you understand.
如果你听懂了拍下手
Ab-dude, we should roll to the wedding.
艾兄我们应该溜冰去参加婚礼
We'll take in more nature faster.
这样会更快吸收大自然
Yes. These are Jaime's.
没错这些是海眉的
We got these after Hurricane Wanda
旺达飓风后我们就买♥♥了这些
for future emergencies.
为以后的紧急状况做准备
They'll obviously be huge, but...
显然有点大但是...
Yeah, I mean, we can maybe stuff some newspaper in
我们可以在
around my negative space in my foot or something
空地方塞些报纸
or sponges, if we have.
或者海绵如果我们有的话
You know, you could wear a bunch of socks or cotton balls.
你可以多穿几双袜子或者塞点棉花球
They-- they fit me.
刚好合脚
They're a little snug, actually.
实际上还挺贴合的
Really? Yeah.
真的吗对啊
Uh, I knew that-- I knew that they would.
我就知道会合脚
I was just being optimistic.
我刚才只是想乐观一点
No, that's cool, dude.
不没事姐们
That's cool.
没事
Yeah.
是啊
That's cool.
没事
Man, this is great.
这太棒了
I love breezes.
我喜欢微风
Nature is seriously amazing.
大自然真的很不可思议
So where's this dog wedding?
狗狗婚礼在哪里举♥行♥
Oh my god. I don't know.
天啊我不知道
We gotta go back and get our phones.
我们需要回去拿手♥机♥
No, you're not going back to that life right now.
不行你现在不能回到那种生活中去
Come on, we can do this.
加油我们可以的
Yeah, you know what?
你知道吗
If our foremothers can find countries without phones
如果我们的祖先在没有手♥机♥的情况下可以发现新国家
We can find a dang dog wedding.
我们也可以找到狗狗婚礼
Exactly.
没错
We are addicted to the matrix, dude.
我们太沉迷于虚拟世界了姐们
Admitting it is the first step in the road to recovery.
承认这件事是康复之路的第一步