又见彩虹（2013）

The Michael J. Fox Show S01E08

Part 3 June 30, 2021, 4:21 p.m.

就没这么多事儿了
for you to just buy Leigh that upholstery.
那还有什么教育意义呢
Where would the lesson be in that?
我已经打破这个恶性循环了 - 是的是的
I've broken the cycle, honey. - Yes. Yes, you have.
我也就只是牺牲了几晚上睡沙发
And all it cost me was a couple nights on a sofa
早上特早起来和在厕所办公
and getting up extra early and working in the bathroom
还有在衣篮上打字天求你了宝贝
and typing on a hamper... oh, god, please, honey.
你得帮帮我快摆脱掉她
You gotta help me. You gotta get rid of her.
好吧好吧我今晚把她带出去
Okay, okay, okay. Um... I'll take her out tonight.
带她喝点酒把她软化然后
I will soften her up with a few drinks and then
我在慢慢的建议她赶紧麻溜的闪人
I will gently suggest that she get the hell out of here.
但是有句话得说明白这些我提前都猜到了
But just for the record, I predicted all of this.
连厕所都猜到了 - 不这个算是额外惊喜
Even the toilet? - No, that was just a fun bonus.
Fonz的办公室也是在厕所的
Just so you know, the Fonz's office was in a bathroom.
宝贝你跟Fonz差远了 - 嗨
Honey, you are so not the Fonz. - Hey.
谢谢
Thank you.
整蛊Ian太容易了因为他太过自信
It's easy to prank Ian because he's so sure of himself.
总是出错却从不怀疑
Often wrong, never in doubt.
计划是让他最终放弃无奈的向服务员要账单
The plan was for him to eventually give up and ask for the check.
然后我叫服务员拿给他
Then I'd have the waitress bring him
一个奶酪棒和一顶水手帽
a single mozzarella stick and a sailor cap.
整蛊成功
Sha-boof.
我本以为这会很有趣
It was supposed to be funny.
但是并没有
But it wasn't.
嘘 Mike明天有个很重要的采访
Shh. Mike has a very big interview tomorrow.
我知道怎么溜进漆黑的房♥间里
I think I know how to sneak into a dark apartment.
哦这东西什么时候在那儿的
Oh, that came out of nowhere.
嗨 - 现在可是凌晨两点了
Hi. - It's 2:00 in the morning!
随便了 Mike大本钟
Whatever, Mike o'Clock.
这确实搞笑因为你不是爱尔兰人
Okay, that... that is funny because you are not Irish.
啥 - 还有我们都喝多了
Huh? - Also 'cause we're drunk.
每次我们一接吻
The bartender gave us
酒保就请我们喝酒
free drinks every time we kissed each other.
这下好了你唤醒了"大学Annie"
Oh, great, you reawakened "College Annie."
不大学Annie会伸舌头的
Oh, no. "College Annie" Would've used tongue.
我会的 - 我老婆跟我妹接吻
I would have. - My wife is kissing my sister.
这真是真是好玩你知道还有啥好玩不
That's... that's fun. You know what else is fun?
立马上♥床♥睡觉我必须得睡觉了
Going to bed immediately. I've got to get some sleep.
你确定一定以及肯定是对的
You are absolutely, totally right.
我们马上就去
And we are gonna pull it together for you.
比萨比萨到了 - 噢
Pizza! Pizza! - Oh, pucker up!
我想要免费的长棍面包
I want free crazy bread.
不行别亲了 - 嗨比萨小子
No! No kissing for bread! - Hey, Mr. Pizza man.
你到底死哪去了还有五分钟就开始了
Where the hell have you been? We're on in 5 minutes!
气色不错 Henry先生我不能骗你
Looking good, Mr. Henry. I can't lie to you.
你看起来像在沟里过了一夜
You look like you slept in a ditch.
昨晚我没睡好我妹妹亲了我老婆
I didn't get much sleep last night. My sister kissed my wife
在沙发上把面包吐得到处都是
and then threw up crazy bread all over the couch.
什么你办了派对却没邀请我
Oh, so you had a party and didn't invite me?
走吧我们去吧
Let's go, let's do this.
不不不 - 这边
Oh! No, no, no, no. - Okay, well...
他在这边摄影机和灯光都在那边
he's over here where all the cameras and the lights are.
早上好州长先生 - Mike 幸会
Hello, Governor. - Mike, great to see you.
谢谢你们请我来 - 我的荣幸
Thanks for having me on. - My pleasure.
很好 - 你握得太用力了
Great. - You're crushing my hand.
抱歉 - 大家好我是Mike Henry
Oh, sorry. - Hello, I'm Mike Henry.
今天我们将对话新泽西州长
Today we'll be speaking to the Governor of New Jersey,
克里斯·克里斯帝先生
Chris Christie. Governor,
欢迎你 - 谢谢你 Mike
welcome. - Mike, thanks for having me.
很高兴看到你重返岗位
I'm so glad to see you back doing your job.
你知道吗我认为你的经历非常激励人
And, you know, I find your story just so inspiring...
事实上我认为你是励志的楷模
in fact, I think it's so inspiring.
社会上有许多传闻
There's been a lot of speculation
我今天受到你的鼓舞
about things, and I feel so inspired today.
想做一个公开说明那么 Mike
I think I should make an announcement. So Mike...
叫醒他
Wake him up!
嗨
Hi.
松饼
Muffins!
我们等等再讨论这个问题
Uh... Well, we'll get to that question later.
我何必费这个心呢
Why do I even bother?
哦 - 某人喝疯了哈
Oh... - Someone's got a hangover.
不只是派对和快乐时光过后的恶心头痛而已
No, just a little party headache with some good-time nausea.
你在做什么 - 给我和Ian煎蛋
What are you doing? - Making omelets for me and Ian.
噢真体贴
Oh, that's sweet.
我希望你♥爸♥爸和你姑姑也这么友爱
I wish your father and your aunt were as close as you.
嘿这个长棍面包哪来的
Hey, where'd this crazy bread come from?
你真不记得了 - 我现在正需要它
You seriously don't remember? - This is exactly what I need.
我就是...不不再等等
I just... oh, god, no. Whoa, too soon. Too soon.
来个煎蛋吗 - 你刚坐在上面了吧
Want an omelet? - You probably put your butt on them,
我对屁♥股♥味的煎蛋不太感兴趣还是算了吧
and since I'm not partial to butt omelets, I shall pass.
你看起来心情不错啊
You seem to be in a good mood.
Johnson昨晚没出现
Johnson was actually a no-show last night,
但是他发了邮件来道歉
but I got an email from him apologizing.
我不能对他太残忍♥
I had to let him down easy.
他说如果不是昨天搬到波基普西去了的话
He said I'd have been an Insta-hire
一定会果断录用我
if they'd not just relocated to Poughkeepsie last night.
也许这样最好
Well, maybe it's for the best.
所以我要去波基普西 - 等等什么
So I'm going to Poughkeepsie. - Wait, what?
不好意思我要去赶火车了
Now if you'll excuse me, I have a train to catch.
等等 Ian
Wait... Ian?!
Leigh 我们一定要天哪这是什么
Leigh, we have to ta... Oh, what is that?
钢管舞
Pole dancing.
可以激发潜能而且对脊柱也很有好处
It's so empowering, and it's really good for your core.
你是怎么算了
How did you... nevermind.
听着我在早上一整个重要的采访中都昏昏欲睡
Look, I fell asleep during my big interview with...
旋转下剪式
Scissor grab!
我能感受到身体在燃烧 Mike - 去楼下烧吧
I can really feel the burn, Mike. - Take the burn downstairs.
既然驱虫的人走了你可以回去了
It should be aired out now the exterminator's gone.
那家伙来过但他没喷药
Oh, the exterminator came, but he didn't spray.
他没什么 - 他告诉我药剂有毒的时候
He didn't what?! - When he told me how
我就让他哪来回哪去了
toxic that stuff was, I sent him on his way.
真希望有一种毒药
Hopefully to get an even deadlier chemical
可以让你快点离开这里
that will get you out of here faster.
别担心我的营养师说要烧鼠尾草
Don't worry. My nutritionist said to burn sage.
通常需要两到三星期
It usually takes about two to three weeks.
"两到三星期" 还是你的营养师说的
"Two to three weeks"? And this time line is coming
这真是毫无意义
from your nutritionist, so it means... nothing!
冷静 Mike 臭虫又不是在你床上
Calm down, Mike. You'd think you were the one with bed bugs.
它确实在 Leigh 就是你
I do have bed bugs, Leigh. You're my bed bug!
你闯进我家里扰乱我的家人毁了我的生活
You've infested my house, you've destroyed our lives,
我告诉你现在就给我走
I've gotta get you out of here now!
这是唯一一个你没有放乳液的地方
That's the only thing in this house you haven't put lotion on.
就是这样我自己来搞定
That's it. I'm doing it myself.
什么 - 那个驱虫的家伙手上有活
What? - The exterminator was booked.
所以我给了他一百块他给了我杀虫剂
So I slipped him 100 bucks. He gave me the pesticides.
氧气罐有了喷雾器有了
I got bombs, I got sprays,
放汽车电池里那玩意也有了
I got the stuff they put in car batteries.
你居然还在床上躺着啊
Are you seriously still in bed?
这就是你拒绝Leigh的下场
This is what happens when you say "No" To Leigh.
这是和Leigh一起灌酒的下场吧
This is what happens when you drink Jager shots with Leigh.
这就是你的保护措施
That's all the protection you're using?
我大脑都损伤了一点点化学药剂能奈我何
I got a brain disease. What are a few chemicals gonna do to me?
Ian Ian
Ian! Ian!
Ian - Eve 你来这做什么
Ian! - Eve, what are you doing here?
根本没David Johnson这人是我编的
There is no David Johnson. I made it up.
只是为了报复你
This was my prank to get you back.
我从没想过会变成这样
I-I never meant for it to get this far.
我感觉糟透了
I feel terrible.
得了吧
Nice try.
通往波基普西的19次列车即将开启
All aboard track 19 for Poughkeepsie.
得走了下次再见
Gotta run. See you when I see you.