金色年代

The Goldbergs S07E09

Part 2 March 1, 2020, 11:49 a.m.

Thanks to my older bro, I'm always the one who dealt it,
最后都算是我放的
regardless of who smelt it.
我大姐抢走了我的房♥间
And my older sister decided to take my room.
所以现在我睡沙发了
So now I sleep on the couch.
你为什么不睡她原本的房♥间
Why not take her old room?
让后再让她抢回去吗
And have her take it back?
才不要那样就没完没了了
No. I'm not jumping on that carousel.
我妈所有的关爱都优先给我姐
My sister gets priority on all my mom's love and affection.
没人在乎你悲惨的家庭生活马特·布莱德利
No one cares about your tragic home life, Matt Bradley.
我想在塑料游戏垫上继续跑
I want to run on a plastic mat!
谁没有故事
Well, we all have stories.
我帮你们开门
I'll get the door for you.
JTP 我要求你们留下
JTP, I demand you stay.
抱歉甜甜大姐说了算
Sorry, Tasty. Big sis rules.
我的微笑背后都是痛苦
Behind this smile is pain.
别担心小巴我留下
Don't worry, Bar. I'm staying.
有勇气的男人
A man of courage.
你误会了我不是为你留下的
Oh, you misread that. I-I'm not here for you.
我能留下是因为爱丽卡想让我留下
I-I get to stay because it's Erica's will.
这不公平
This is not fair!
我们都是新生
We're both freshmen!
技术上来讲我们是平等的
We're technically equals!
他确实有道理小天使
He does have a point, angelface.
你站在谁那边施瓦茨
Whose side are you on, Schwartz?
抱歉大甜甜
Sorry, Big Tasty.
爱丽卡之前没用这种威胁语气
Erica's threatening tone was new information.
杰夫瑞·疯男·施瓦茨
Geoffrey "Mad Man" Schwartz,
我救过你几次命
how many times have I saved your life?
一次都没有
None?
要不是你这么无聊不愿冒险我会救你的
I would've if you weren't so boring and risk-averse.
被夹在你俩中间让我很不舒服
I'm not comfortable being in the middle of this.
你就要被夹在我俩中间已经定了
You will be in the middle of this. It's decided.
作为中立的第三方由你来建立
As a neutral third party, you will establish
一套阻止我们小吵小闹的规则
a system of rules to stop our petty squabbling.
听起来像场噩梦
That sounds like a nightmare!
我没意见但记住每天是谁抱你亲你
I'm good with it. But just remember who hugs and kisses you.
亲亲抱抱要多少有多少
Oh, well, there's plenty of that to go around.
快来
Come on!
来抱抱快来
Get in there. Come in.
别傻站着快点
Doing all the work. Come on.
我的好兄弟
My guy.
正当杰夫被夹在巴瑞和爱丽卡之间时
As Geoff was caught in the middle of Barry and Erica,
我妈的重大重写工程进入了尾声
my mom was at the end of her big rewrite.
宝贝用你美味的少男眼
Schmoo, feast your delicious boy eyes
饱览这四百页珍馐家庭史
on 400 pages of scrumptious family history.
这
Wow, this has...
字也太多了
So many words.
大多数都与食物无关
Most not about food.
这个壮汉是谁
And who is that sturdy fella?
那是你太姨艾斯特
That's your great-aunt Esther.
怎么双眼都戴了眼罩
Why two eye patches?
这是个有趣的故事
This is a funny story.
她被一匹马拖着横跨镇子
Uh, she was dragged by a horse through the town.
确实有趣
That is funny.
直到缰绳终于被树枝挂住
Until the reins finally got stuck in a tree branch,
马压在了她身上
and the horse fell on top of her.
所以他们当然射杀了马
So, of course, they shot it.
你为什么要把这故事写进食谱
And why would you put that in a book about food?
因为第二天她做了美味的炖马肉
Because the next day, she made a delicious horse stew.
我换成了羔羊肉因为有些人太古板了
I changed it to lamb because some people can be stuffy.
她有十四个孩子肯定要做很多菜
And she must've had to make a lot since she had 14 kids.
不正如我在配料旁边写的那样
No, no. As I indicated here next to the ingredients,
只有六个孩子活了下来
uh, only six of them lived.
疾病战争寒冬饥荒
Disease, war, winter, famine.
其中七个就是直接被踩死的
Seven of them were just stomped to death.
而你就这样写进了食谱里
And you put that right here in a book about food.
你显然知道自己在做些什么
So, you clearly know what you're doing.
你介不介意读完整本书
Would you mind reading the whole thing,
在我交稿前告诉我你的看法
and telling me what you think before I send it in?
我觉得我已经懂了
I think I get it.
马拖着女士跑
A horse drags a lady,
培根松饼被踩死的亲戚
pancake dippers, a cousin gets stomped.
你这本书肯定大卖♥♥ 女士
You got yourself a winner, lady.
只有这家出版商对我的书有兴趣
This is the only publisher who's shown any interest,
假如他不喜欢我不知道该怎么办
and if he doesn't like it, I don't know what I'll do.
我看看也行
I guess I could...
谢谢
Thank you.
正当我像太姨艾斯特一样
While I was dragged like Aunt Esther
被拖来读我妈的食谱时
into reading my mom's cookbook,
杰夫正被巴瑞和爱丽卡两头拖
Geoff was pulled between Barry and Erica.
好了你们两个拿着的文件夹
Okay, so you're both holding the binders
是我一夜没睡做出来的
that I stayed up all night creating
里面是确保宿舍安全愉快的规章
with the guidelines in order to keep this room safe and fun.
这太蠢了我想要蓝色的那个
These are so stupid. And I want the blue one.
你们所有生活问题都能找到详细解决方式
You'll find it details solutions to all of your living issues.
好多字和标签
Oh, so many words and tabs!
叫你的大嘴巴女友别再那么霸道就好了
Just tell your loudmouth girlfriend to stop being so bossy.
我会趁你睡觉时捶爆你的狗头
I will punch your head while you sleep.
闹笑话的是你我的头骨特别强壮
Joke's on you. My skull is crazy-jacked.
二位不准捶人睡着醒着都不行
Guys, no punching... Asleep or otherwise.
在这里你们能找到清楚的指南
In here, you'll find clear instructions
指导你们分享一切
on how to share everything.
-例如迷你冰箱 -没门
- Like the mini-fridge. - No way.
我向所有生鲜承诺它们会住在安全的天堂
I promised my perishables a safe haven.
你把床单塞在里面
You put your sheets in there.
你知道我体温很高
You know I run hot!
现在是寒冬邋遢鬼
It's the dead of winter, barfbag!
你该去检查一下血液循环问题
You should really get your circulation checked.
已经检查过了
Already did.
和你一样问题多多
It's a trouble area, like you.
够了有纠纷查文件
Enough. Consult your binders.
我不是你们的裁判
I'm not your referee.
等等就是这样
Wait, that's it.
你就是我们的裁判杰判
You're our referee... Our Geoff-er-ee.
跟你名字很像这也是你的新工作了
It works 'cause it's your name and also your new job.
我才不要一直留在这调停你们每次口角
I'm not staying here full-time to mediate every fight,
冲突和争执
conflict, or disagreement.
肯定比这破文件夹有用
It would work better than these crappy binders.
是啊这次你失误了亲爱的
Yeah. Swing and a miss, hon.
你都没打开看看
You didn't even open them.
我们已经放下你丢人的文件夹向前看了
We've moved on from your embarrassing binders.
-你也该向前看 -你了解我们
- You should, too. - You know us.
你不能信任我们会遵守规则
We can't be trusted to follow the rules.
对我来说所有情况都是危急情况
And every moment is touch-and-go with me.
我这人也不好相处
And I'm no day at the beach, either.
我知道我现在没什么事可做
I-I know I don't have a lot going on...
-什么事都没有 -我暗地里很担心
- Like nothing. - I'm secretly worried.
那就这么定了
Then it's settled.
杰夫瑞会作为仲裁者
Geoffrey will be the arbiter
仲裁这七面墙里发生的一切
of everything that happens within these seven walls.
-七面 -从现在开始
- Seven? - And it starts now!
失陪
Excuse me
我要去爱丽卡床上剪愤怒参差的脚趾甲
while I clip my angry, jagged toenails on Erica's bed.
杰判
Geoff-er-ee?
小巴或许你该去卫生间剪
Bar, maybe that's a bathroom task?
这个安排真有趣
That's an interesting fix.
谢了杰判
Thanks, Geoff-er-ee.
这下你弥补了文件夹的大失误
You are really making up for that binder fiasco.
正当杰夫充当裁判时
As geoff was playing referee,
我则在寻求教练帮助
I was looking for some coaching
该如何应对我妈的食谱