诊疗中（2023）
Shrinking
第二季
剧集 | 诊疗中（2023） | 导航列表
诊疗中（2023）
Shrinking S02E09
Part 3
Dec. 18, 2024, 8:56 p.m.
我知道这听起来很老套 但军队让我振作起来
I know it sounds corny, but it helped me get my shit together.
现在 我有了永远支持我的朋友
Now, I've got friends I can count on forever.
很棒
Cool.
但考特尼 我只是希望能有更多的时间
But, Courtney, I just thought that I'd have more time.
我知道答应过给你三个月时间来安顿妈
I know I promised you three months with Mom.
所以 如果你希望我推迟些 明年还有一个参军机会
So, if you want me to wait, there's another portal next year.
我会征得你同意才去做这事
I'm not doing this without your blessing.
等等 这是你们策划好的吗
Hold up. Is this the plan?
你们这些家伙化身为 一个古怪的情绪操控团
You guys become some weirdo emotionally-manipulative platoon
然后用楚楚可怜的眼神看我 让我屈服
and just give me sad eyes until I cave in?
该死的 还真有效
Damn it. It's working.
我真为你高兴
I'm really happy for you.
谢谢你
Thank you.
我去拿酒来庆祝一下
I'll grab drinks to celebrate.
我帮你
I'll help.
我要上他
I'm gonna fuck him.
真的 在“虾车”里
Really? In the shrimp truck?
瞧我们 为我们所爱的人做美好的事
Look at us doing good things for the people we love.
即使对方多管闲事 也不会生他的气
Not getting mad at each other for meddling.
你被列入了我的黑名单 - 好的
You are on my shit list. - Okay.
你觉得她能胜任吗 说认真的
You think she's gonna be okay? Like, seriously?
我觉得她会做得非常好
I think she's gonna be great.
在我的记忆中 无论是第一次约会 第一次面试或第一次做任何事情
I can't think of a single first date or interview, or first anything,
我都做得很糟
that didn't go horribly.
你知道因为史蒂文提前走了 他将不会付我钱 对吧
You realize because Steven left early I don't get paid, right?
别分心
Focus.
我不晓得为何我的事情总是迅速变糟
I don't know why everything always goes south for me so quickly.
我有些看法
I have thoughts.
我不该来这里
I shouldn't have come here.
你是没法这么快就看懂我的
There's no way you can figure me out quickly enough.
我这人太复杂了
I'm too complex.
你自小就是同性恋 在得克萨斯州长大 有个思想保守的父亲
You grew up gay in Texas with a conservative father,
所以你身上产生出某些生存策略
so you developed strategies to survive
你现在的防御机制是 会在与人相处时先发制人
and now your defense mechanism is to lash out when you meet people,
因为你害怕他们会先拒绝你
because you're afraid that they'll reject you first.
不对
Nuh-uh.
布莱恩 听着 查理使你人性化了
Brian, look, Charlie humanizes you.
如果你非得说话不可 也至少让他负责大部分的话
Maybe just let him do most, if not all, of the talking.
我可受不了45分钟不说话
I'm not capable of going 45 minutes without talking.
我的最高记录是三分钟 而且那时我刚切除了扁桃体
My record is three, and I'd just gotten my tonsils out.
好吧 你就告诉查理 当他看到你陷入防御模式时
Okay, you tell Charlie that when he sees you falling into your defensive patterns,
就轻轻地捏一下你的胳膊
he can lightly squeeze your arm.
以便提示你做深呼吸 重新调整状态
Now, that will be your cue to just take a deep breath, reset,
然后说出和你原本想说的完全相反的话
and say the exact opposite of what you were about to say.
知道了
Got it.
我究竟怎么啦
What is wrong with me?
你没事 兄弟
Nothing, buddy.
我担心的是那些被困住的人
The people I worry about are the ones who are stuck.
但你不是其中之一
That's not you.
听着 兄弟 真希望 你能通过我的眼睛看看你自己
Look, man, I wish that you could look at yourself through my eyes
看看今天的你有多棒
and see just how far you've come.
天啊 吉米 你很擅长给人治疗
Oh, my God. Jimmy, are you good at your job?
是的 偶尔
Yeah, sometimes.
嚣张
Arrogant.
好了 现在我得搞定关于宝宝的部分
Okay, now I gotta get a handle on the baby part.
斯图尔特说这位妈妈 可能会问超多关于育儿的问题
Stuart said the mom could ask a million questions about parenting.
这我就帮不上忙了
That I can't help you with.
当艾丽丝还是个婴儿时 我更像是个“奉命行事”的爸爸
When Alice was a baby, I was more of a "do what you're told" kind of dad.
你知道该找谁
You know who we need to see.
不
No.
无论何时何地 你都得按我说的做
You do what I say, when I say, and how I say it.
我竟然感到有点欲♥火♥攻心 你说奇怪吗
Is it weird that I'm a little turned on?
很好笑吗
Is this funny to you?
要是你害我们得不到这个漂亮的混血宝宝
If you screw up getting us this beautiful mixed baby,
我会把你的老二给扯下来
I will rip your dick off
然后用它来打你的脸
and smack you in the face with it!
不喜欢你们
I hate all of you.
可找到你了 - 嗨
There you are. - Hey.
他们这是在干什么
What's going on back there?
对 她正在给布莱恩 上关于宝宝的所有事的速成课
Oh, yeah. She's giving Brian a crash course on all things baby.
她会想知道你们打算 喂宝宝喝配方奶还是母乳
She's gonna wanna know if you're doing formula or breast milk.
不许说母乳恶心
We don't say "ew" over breast milk.
明白了 虽然恶心 但不能说出来
Got it. It's disgusting, but we don't say it.
这让我想起当你妈妈给你喂奶时
That reminds me when Mom would feed you,
你脸上就会有超可爱的母乳小胡子
you would get the cutest little breast milk mustache.
我不想谈这个 - 理解
I'm gonna skip past that. - That's fair.
我今晚没裙子可穿
I don't have a dress for tonight.
我的意思是 我有上百条裙子 我全都喜欢
I mean, I have a hundred dresses, and I love them all,
但也全都不喜欢 懂我意思吗
but I also hate them all. You know what I mean?
我懂 这就是我不再有短裤的原因
I hear you. That's why I no longer own shorts.
我知道我只是焦虑 但我能买♥♥条新裙子吗
I know I'm just anxious, but can I get a new one?
好啊 我们去买♥♥吧 我来开车
Yeah. Let's do it. I'll drive.
我是想问能不能给我你的信♥用♥卡♥
I was just asking if I can get your credit card?
当然能
Course. Sure thing.
拿着吧 女儿 - 等等 不用训话
Here you go, kid. - Wait. No speech?
没带任何愤怒情绪
No angling to come with?
因为我太想买♥♥了 甚至愿意让你在停车场等我
'Cause I want this so bad. I'd let you sit in the parking lot.
不需要 你能行
Nah. You got this.
谢了 - 买♥♥得开心点
Thanks. - Have fun.
“停车场”听起来很棒
Parking lot sounded sweet.
是吧 - 的确
Right? - Yeah.
因为若他们五分钟后没出来
'Cause if they take longer than five minutes,
你可以谎称自己只是想伸伸腿 然后进去
you can pretend you're just stretching your legs and go in.
监视他们
Spy on them.
是啊 这就是爸爸 - 是的
Yeah. Dad life. - Yeah.
虽然很在乎 却得在孩子面前装不在乎
Make your kid think you don't care when you do.
真该死
Fuck yeah.
我们发现马修又丢了工作
We found out Matthew lost his job again...
我和莉兹都很想安慰他
and Liz and I, you know, we want to comfort him,
但在他亲口告诉我们之前 我们什么也不能说
but we can't say anything until he tells us himself.
你们是怎么忍♥住的
How do you not cave?
每当我忍♥不住时 就在我的蛋蛋上轻轻弹一下
Every time I feel tempted, I just flick myself on the balls.
好的 - 对
Right. - Yeah.
我会找到适合自己的方法
I'll find my own thing.
听着 我对军队没兴趣
Listen, the army's not my thing.
我不喜欢睡双层床
I don't love a bunk bed.
你妈可知道你妹要离开
Does your mom know your sister's leaving yet?
还不知道 考特尼正在告诉她
No. Courtney's telling her right now.
好的 对了 我得做我的伸展运动了 赛克斯医生发了一些新的过来
Okay, well... I gotta do my stretches. Dr. Sykes sent some new ones over.
等等 电臀舞能治疗帕金森症吗
Wait, twerking helps with Parkinson's?
我知道你想让我出去 但我没打算走
I know you want me to get out of here, but I'm not going to.
你想我妈会希望搬来跟我住吗
Do you think my mom's gonna want to move in with me?
我怎会知道 我从没见过她
How would I know? I never met her.
你会想和梅格一起住吗
Would you wanna live with Meg?
我不晓得
I don't know.
也许有一天会吧
Maybe someday.
我在地球上剩下的时间越少
The less time I have left on Earth,
就越想和我的孩子在一起
the more I think about being near my kid.
对 好的 但你知道吗 我现在要做的事太多了
Yeah, right, but I got a lot going on right now, you know?
工作 教学 成为地下城主
Work, teaching, being a Dungeon Master.
是跟性有关的
Is that a sex thing?
不 保罗 是类似“龙与地下城”的桌游
No, Paul. It's a Dungeons & Dragons thing.
但来了个新玩家 他可帅了
But there is a new guy. He's cool.
有我妈在身边
I can't have my mom around
该怎么带他去做♥爱♥城 也就是奶♥子♥之城呢
while I'm trying to take him to the bone zone aka titty city.
怎样才能让她明白 若我给她请个住家保姆
How do I make her understand that she'll be a lot happier
来让她待在家里 她会更加快乐
if I get her live-in help and she stays at home?
听着 这与她无关
Look, this isn't about her.
这是关于设定界限 说出你想要的
This is about setting boundaries. And saying what you want.
会很不容易 但我会去做
It'll be hard, but I'll do it.
诊疗中（2023）
Shrinking
剧集 | 诊疗中（2023） | 导航列表