黑钱胜地

Ozark S02E07

Part 5 March 31, 2020, 4:35 p.m.

附近有什么就抓住什么
you grab hold of whatever's closest.
枪药
Guns, drugs.
上帝
God.
灭火器
Fire extinguisher.
你这辈子从没抓住过上帝
You've never grabbed a hold of God once in your life.
你根本不知道我是什么人
You have no idea who I am.
我抓住过上帝
I grabbed hold of God.
我拉着他求救
I hung on for dear life.
上帝却没回手抓住我
God didn't exactly grab back.
在我长大的地方自杀就是一种宗教
Where I grew up, self-annihilation was a religion.
信徒比基♥督♥教还多也更狂热
More followers than Christianity's. More passionate, too.
性酒毒
Sex, booze, drugs.
我15岁之前全沾了我转变得很快
All before I was 15. I was a quick convert.
而唯一一个让我没再更加堕落的地方
And the one place that kept me from going under
就是我跟你说过的那个教堂
was that church I told you about.
我父亲徒手建起来的那个教堂
The one that my daddy built with his bare hands.
当我无法回家的时候
And when going home wasn't an option,
因为也是那个父亲有时候他会决定
because that very same daddy decided he loved liquor
爱酒比爱耶稣要多一些
just a little bit more than he loved Jesus that night?
我就会去教堂
I went to church.
虽然我是个罪人但我知道自己需要去教堂
Even though I was a sinner, I knew I needed it.
我在那里会感到安全
And I felt safe there.
然后当我长到...
Then when I turned about...
17岁左右我意识到了自己的方向
seventeen, I realized where I was headed.
我目送太多朋友英年早逝了
I'd put one too many friends into an early grave,
那让我惊恐万分
and it scared the shit out of me.
于是我去找了我的牧师
So I went to my pastor,
我让自己投入了他仁慈的怀抱
and I threw myself into the loving arms of his mercy,
寻求救赎
looking for salvation.
或者至少是一线希望
Or at least a little hope.
我把一切都告诉了他
I told him everything.
我坚信他的原谅能让我完整
I believed his forgiveness would make me whole.
我甚至说了堕胎的事
I even told him about the abortions.
他说的话都很恰到好处
And he said all the right things.
说我一定感到很孤独说我偏离了正轨
How lonely I must've felt, how we all stray from the path,
说最重要的是我要继续前行
how the important thing was that I was walking it again.
但他收紧下巴的样子
But the way his jaw tightened,
他看我时严厉的目光我知道了
the way his eyes hardened when he looked at me, I knew.
我知道他再也不会像以前那样看我了
I knew he'd never look at me the same way again.
我伤心欲绝
And I was devastated.
我很心碎我并不受欢迎
I was heartbroken, and I wasn't welcome.
于是我背弃了上帝
So I left God behind.
因为你想背弃他
Because you wanted to leave him behind.
因为你从没真正信仰过对吗
Because you never truly believed, right?
跟一个南部的牧师说堕胎的事
A Southern preacher and abortions?
你很清楚他会作何反应
You knew exactly how he'd react.
所以你才告诉了他
That's why you told him.
之后多久你就离开家了
How long after did you leave home?
六个月
Six months.
好吧你自己也说了
Okay. So you said it yourself.
教堂当时是你仅存的希望
The church was the only thing that you had left.
所以你需要他拒绝你
So you needed him to reject you,
这样你就别无选择只能离开了
so that way you had no choice but to leave.
但任何真正相信的人都不会就那样离开
But anyone who truly believes can't just walk away like that.
真正相信的人
Anyone who truly believes can't just
不会就那样背弃自己的信仰
turn their back on their faith,
哪怕是为了生存
not even for survival.
你离开了教堂行你离开了牧师行
You leave a church, fine. You leave a pastor, fine.
但你会找到新的信仰
But you find a new one.
因为真正相信的人会知道信仰不是选择
Because anyone who believes knows that faith isn't a choice.
而是生命的本质
It's the essence of life.
你明白吗
Do you understand?
当初我闯入那场抢劫的时候
When I walked into that robbery,
我跟你一样绝望
I was just as desperate as you were.
我没有工作没有家庭
I had no job. I had no family,
没有方向没有活下去的理由
no direction, no reason to live.
但我走进了那家店
But I walked into that store
因为我知道上帝会保佑我
'cause I knew that God would protect me.
当我迷失的时候我没有离开他
When I was lost, I didn't walk away from him.
而是走向了他
I walked towards him.
梅森
Oh, Mason...
你走进那家店不是为了找上帝
You didn't walk into that store to find God.
你是去找死的
You walked into that store to die.
上帝只是你在过程中顺便发现的
God was just something you happened to find along the way.
快点啊现在可别耍我
Come on, don't you tease me now,
我就差一点了
not when I'm about this close.
该死鲁丝我说了照着我的手
God damn it, Ruth, I said keep that goddamn light on my hands.
该死操
Fuck. Shit.
-该死 -把手电关了
- Fuck. - Kill the light.
下面有人吗
Hey! Is somebody down there?
你说他两点才会来的
You said he wasn't gonna be here till two.
我说的是"我觉得"
I said, "I thought."
我的猎枪很爱交新朋友
My shotgun just loves making new friends.
-该死 -快走
- Fuck. Shit. - Come on.
我们得进到水里
We gotta get in the water.
-下面有人吗 -该死
- Hey! Is someone down there? - Shit.
操
Fuck. Fuck.
等等把衣服掀起来
Wait. Lift up your shirt,
转过去口袋掏出来
turn around, flip out your pockets.
不我没有武器
No, I'm-- I'm unarmed.
我一个人就像你说的
I'm-- I'm alone, just like you said.
我只是在把你的孩子拿出来
I'm just getting your kid.
但我不会把他给你
But I'm not giving him to you
除非我确认温迪没事
until I know that Wendy's okay.
-温迪 -温迪
- Wendy! - Wendy?
马蒂是你吗
Marty, is that you?
-马蒂我在这里 -温迪
- Marty, I'm here. -Wendy.
我说了我的猎枪就爱交新朋友
Like I said, my shotgun just loves making new friends.
你们打算把我怎么样
What are you gonna do to me?
你说什么呢
What are you talking about?
我一旦让你们离开
As soon as I let you leave,
你们怎么会不打给警♥察♥
what's to stop you from calling the police
把我做的事告诉他们
and telling them what I did?
-我们绝不会那么做的梅森 -他会
- We would never do that, Mason. - He would.
我们说好的温迪换齐克
We had an agreement. Wendy for Zeke.
对我来说
As far as I'm concerned,
我们一离开这整件事就结束了
this whole thing is over as soon as we leave here.
我怎么能确定
How can I be so sure?
因为我信守了承诺
Because I kept my word on that.
我会继续信守承诺
I'm gonna keep my word on this.
我怎么知道
How do I know?
我怎么知道你没有已经给他们打了电♥话♥
How do I know that you didn't already call 'em
把我的所在告诉了他们
and tell 'em where I'm at?
-我怎么知道 -梅森...
- You know? How do I know... - Mason, Mason--
他们这会儿没在外面
...that they're not up there right now?
等你们俩一走出这里
Waiting for you two to walk out of here
他们就下来...
and then come down here to...
你闭嘴行吗
Will you shut up?
你对他做了什么
What did you do to him?
给你你在说什么
Here. What are you talking about?
把他弄成了这样
To make him this way.
我把他直接带来了这里
I brought him straight here as--
他们一把他交给我我就直接带他来这里了
I brought him straight here as soon as they gave him to me.
梅森婴儿如果一阵子没见到你
Mason, it's completely natural for a baby to cry
哭是很正常的
if you haven't seen them for a while.
不他对他做了什么
No, no, no. He did something to him.
你这话根本没道理
You're not making any sense.
我他妈非常有道理
I'm making perfect fucking sense.
我不可能对他做任何事
There's nothing I could have possibly done to him.
你想做什么都能做到
You can do whatever you want.