熟女镇（2009）

Cougar Town S03E06

Part 2 Dec. 8, 2020, 10:42 p.m.

I don't actually ride the waves.
其实我不冲浪
I just sit here. I'm a wave-sitter.
坐着就好我是骑浪者
Well, that makes less sense than nonalcoholic beer...
这种行为比无酒精啤酒
or soccer.
和足球更无聊
I love it, and until you showed up with your frazzle dazzle,
我就喜欢要不是你耍酷华丽出现
I got to be alone.
一个人呆着挺享受
Only hard part is getting back to shore,
唯一麻烦的是要怎么回去
but I have a system.
但我自有法子
You want me to teach you how to surf?
你要我教你冲浪吗
Yes, please.
当然拜托了
No.
别动
Wait.
停住
No, you wait.
先别吃
Go get it.
好了吃吧
Now scram. I got to talk to Grayson.
闪开我要和格雷森谈谈
Do you think Dr. Mettler sees us as a good couple?
你觉得米特勒医生认为我们是模范夫妻吗
It's hard to know for sure, you know,
挺难捉摸的你也知道
unless we had her notebook. Oh, wait.
除非我们能搞到她的笔记本等等
I do. Ha ha!
这不就是吗哈哈
You stole her notebook?
你偷了她的笔记本吗
I have never been so attracted to you.
你在我眼里从未这么诱人
Soul mates.
灵魂伴侣就是不一样
Check it out.
来看看
Oh. Here we are.
我们在这
Oh, yeah, look, look, she wrote down "narcissist"
看她写的"孤芳自赏"
but doesn't say which one of us she meant.
但没有指明是谁
It's gotta be me. I'm sure it's me.
肯定是我应该是说我
Oh, she also says we're compatible
她还说我们很配
and have a bright future.
未来幸福
We are baggage-free.
看来我们是零负担呀
Hey, Gray-Gray.
嘿小格格
So this is kind of what I wanted to catch up about.
这就是我想跟你讲的事儿
She's yours.
这女娃儿是你的
That feels like baggage.
现在有负担了吧
Both have tiny eyes.
眼睛都小小的
It's a baby. Everything's tiny.
这是个婴儿小孩子什么都很小啊
We're screwed. This is a nightmare.
悲剧了噩梦降临
Oh, hey. Do you guys have any wasabi almonds?
你们这有芥末杏仁吗
Actually, yes. No.
有啊不行
No snacks until after you explain
你得跟我好好解释当初为啥瞒着我
why you never told me.
不然不给零食吃
Ohh, but I'm so hungry.
但我好饿啊
Come on, man. She's starving.
老兄拜托她都快饿死了
Why am I fighting for her?
为啥我在帮她说话
I don't know.
不知道
When we threw down, you were, like, all angry and dark,
我俩闹翻的时候你又阴沉又生气
which was so freakin' hot...
虽说看着超性感
But it was also a little bit scary, wasn't it?
但也有点吓人的不是吗
Now you just seem so happy and stable.
现在你这么开心安定
Holly? What? No way.
霍莉不是吧
You know her?
你认识她吗
Yeah, since, like, grade school.
小学就认识
Oh, here's my baby girl.
哎呀我的小亲亲
You know her?
你连这奶娃子也认识
Tampa's my goddaughter.
坦帕是我的教女
My daughter's name is Tampa?
我女儿叫坦帕
You're the father?
你是孩子他爹吗
I think this might be my favorite day ever.
我觉得这是我有史以来最爱的一天
Really? Let me have this.
是吗放过我吧
So can you guys take Tampa tonight?
你们今晚能照顾一下坦帕吗
'Cause I need to dance.
因为我要去跳舞
Seriously, I don't want to. I need to.
真的不是我想跳而是日常需要
I'm assuming that when you slept with my fiance,
那么你不仅跟我未婚夫上了床
you also slept with other guys as well?
还跟其他人上♥床♥
Hells, yeah, I did.
废话那是当然
Okay, well, I think we should take a paternity test,
好那我们来做个亲子鉴定吧
you know, just for fun.
随便做个玩玩
Man, I can't believe Grayson
格雷森居然搞大了那个女孩的肚子
knocked that girl up.
难以置信
I don't think that baby's his.
我不认为那是他的孩子
Have you seen how tight his jeans are?
看他的牛仔裤多紧绷啊
He's definitely firing blanks.
肯定放的都是空枪
I'll get more wax.
我得再抹点蜡
Break it down, sister.
去吧
Bobby. Teaching Ellie anything is a bad idea.
鲍比教艾莉那么多不好
I tried showing her how to text a picture.
我曾经试图教她发彩信
She cell-phone-whipped me.
她最后把手♥机♥摔我脸上
I still don't have peripheral vision.
我现在周边视觉还缺失着呢
He should not be driving.
不能让他开车
She's the unteachable woman.
她真是无可救药了
Oh, I'll be fine, little buddy.
没事的兄弟
Your refrigerator is filled with nothing but beer and churros.
你的冰箱里除了啤酒和吉拿棒什么都没有
Yeah, I just went shopping.
没错刚采购了一番
All right, pal. Time to leave.
好了兄弟你该走了
Surf school's a-startin'.
冲浪学校要开始上课了
Well, this sucks. No one wants me around today.
擦今天大家都赶我走
Today?
只有今天吗
How come Angie gets to stay?
安琪怎么能留下
Oh, I occasionally let him touch my boobs.
我偶尔让他摸摸我的胸
Well, I'll let you do that.
我也让你摸
Hit the bricks.
麻溜地走吧
Oh, cool.
不错嘛
You're reading "Hamlet".
你小子还在读《哈姆雷特》
You still hate books, huh?
你对还是不喜欢书是吗
Yeah.
没错
I also decided that since you won't go out to Louie with me,
我觉得既然你不跟我去路易那儿
I'm just gonna come to you.
那我就来找你
Hey, bro?
亲
There is no music in the world that will match what your body is doing.
你这诡异动作可配不上任何音乐
I'm learning how to step dance
我在学踢踏舞
since I'm joining Omega Beta Theta.
因为我要加入OBT会
Why are you joining the black frat?
你为啥要加入黑人兄弟会
Sig has always considered himself black-adjacent.
席格自认为自己是黑人一脉的
Well, I could teach you how to step.
我可以教你啊
Yeah, I have watched "Stomp the Yard,"
我看《街舞少年》
like, one million times.
不知道多少遍了
There's a scene 72 minutes in
七十二分的时候有一幕
where it's just all of these ripped,
就全是一堆喝醉的
hot, black dancers,
热辣无比的黑人舞者
and they're running up this mountain shirtless.
裸着上身冲到山上去
When I'm not talking,
当我不说话的时候
that scene is what I'm thinking about.
满脑子想的都是那一幕
Okay. So you kind of can't practice without a partner.
你好像得需要一个同伴
Travis, get up.
崔维斯站起来
Man.
我勒个去
There's no dude-on-dude dancing in wang town.
连男人国都不跳男男舞
The worst one yet.
这是你说的最糟糕的笑话
I'm glad we did the paternity test together.
我们能一起做亲子鉴定真好
Thanks, Graymond.
谢谢你格雷蒙
"Graymond"? That's not his name.
"格雷蒙" 他不叫这名字
It's not a name.
这甚至都不是个名字
Sure, it is.
当然有这名
There's a friggin' show called "Everyone Loves Graymond."
不是有一部烂剧叫《人人都爱格雷蒙》吗
Get her out.
让她走吧
Um, we'll call you when we get the results, okay?
结果出来后我们再打给你好吗
Okay.
好
Hey, once we find out that I'm not the father,
一旦证实我不是孩子的父亲
which "Maury Povich show" celebration dance
你打算跳"毛里·波维奇秀"里的
are you gon' do?
哪段庆祝舞
I'm gonna do the "boob-shimmy, double point-to-god."
我打算跳"朝天抖胸舞"