工作狂（2011）
Workaholics S02E07
Part 1
June 28, 2021, 1:30 p.m.
谁删了上周的<识骨寻踪>
Hey! Who deleted last week's episode of Bones?
我听说他们接吻了
I heard they kissed.
在哪 - 我就知道
Where is it? - I know!
在哪 - 什么在哪
Where is it? - Where's what?
"大鸡鸡"限♥量♥版
Limited edition lap hog
特大号♥安全套 谁拿了 - 你为啥穿着我的T恤
X.L. Condom. Who took it? - Why are you wearing my shirt?
你的什么 你的T恤 我在二手店买♥♥的
Your what? Your shirt? I got this at the thrift store.
你这么凑巧在二手店买♥♥的我中学的T恤
You got a t-shirt from my middle school Randomly at a thrift store?
对啊 干嘛这么大惊小怪
Yeah. What's the big deal?
二手店就是个宝地
You find lots of treasures at thrift stores.
你谁啊 二手店专家吗 我套子呢
What are you, a thrift-store professional now? Where's my condom?
伙计们 - 你说什么呢
Hey, guys... - what are you talking about?
我护发素不见了
My hair foam's missing. It's gone.
这家伙肯定不需要 他头发厚成那样了
I know he doesn't need it 'cause he's got a thick head of hair.
好的 - 跟狮子似的
Okay. - You're like a lion.
但这位看起来头发多了
But this mane is looking extra thick.
真奇怪 因为就在上周我还在想
That's bizarre, 'cause I was thinking last week
Ders看起来跟秃老太太似的
Ders is looking like a bald, old woman.
我闻闻你头发 - 你干嘛
Let me smell your hair. - What are you...
我得闻闻你头发
I'm gonna need to smell your hair.
住手 你不准闻我头发
Stop it! You're not smelling my hair!
东西呢
Where is it, guys?
这套收藏对我意义重大
This collection means a lot to me, all right?
这T恤可是我
That's the shirt I wore
七年级的时候赢了那个印地安纳琼斯
In seventh grade when I won the indiana jones...
我爸跟Michael Chiklis(演员 是个秃子)似的
My dad looks exactly like michael chiklis.
我不会原谅你拿走了
I will not forgive you if you took it.
Michael Chiklis真的吗
Oh, michael chiklis? Really?
我为什么会想偷什么护发用品
Why would I ever, ever take hair-care products?
我不信你
I don't believe you, man!
你既是个骗子还是个小偷
Well, you are a liar and a thief!
我是啤酒少狼
I'm a teenage beer wolf!
我下来了 - 啤酒狼下来了
I'm down. - Beer wolf down!
准备好无限♥量♥无节制的啤酒之夜了吗 我准备好了
Who is ready for a night at the museum of tolerance of alcohol? I am.
Jillian 这首歌♥放大声点
Jillian Turn, that song up!
不行 她可是我的宝贝
Guys, no! No. She's my baby.
射雨刷上 射雨刷上
Shoot the wiper fluid! Shoot the wiper fluid!
这样挺好啊 你可以看看咱几个技术如何
That's cool. You see everyone's technique.
多谢你
Yes, thank you.
Jillian 真是派对的绝佳点子
Jillian, great idea for a party.
带上了你的头皮收藏
You brought your scalp collection.
不是 Blake
No. No, blake.
这是我的戏服 我在上即兴表演课
They're my costumes. I'm taking an improv class.
我觉得这是个绝佳的时机
I thought this would be the perfect place
准备几个角色的试镜
To start auditioning some of my characters.
我该去当演员
I should be an actor.
很多人说我长得像马特达蒙
A lot of people say I look like matt damon...
的丑弟弟
's his ugly younger brother,
Philip 下颌肉比较多的版本
Philip... just more jowls.
看的出来
I can see that.
没多少人知道他
A lot of people don't know about him.
大家说我像恶搞艾尔
People say I look like weird al sometimes...
他的儿子之类的
Like, his son.
等等 我忘了拿啤酒
Oh, wait. I forgot the beer.
嘿 伙计
Oh! Hey, buddy.
你们找Walker的泳池派对吗
Are you looking for mr. Walker's pool party?
对 我们正要去
Yeah, we're just going up.
是在隔壁的社区泳池
Right. It's gonna be next door in our community pool.
真有趣 - 真的吗
Ooh. Interesting. - Really?
死骗子 - 好的
Oh, he's a trickster. - Okay.
他个死骗子 - 多谢了
He's a trickster. - Thanks a lot.
伙计们 你们稍微自律点好吗
Hey, guys, I need you to behave yourselves,
说真的
For real.
好的 我现在就把这个丢掉
Good call. I'll throw this one away right now.
好 - 谢谢
Yeah. - Thank you.
屌♥炸天 十分球
Rock a jock, ten-point shot!
上吧 - 嘿
Get it! - Hey, oh!
真抱歉
I am sorry about that.
Dan Cortese准能投进
Dan cortese would've made that.
他准能成 - 我真是恨透小混混
He would've made that one. - I hate punks.
抱歉 我们会穿鞋的
Sorry! We're gonna wear shoes.
等等 来啊
Wait a minute. Come on!
啊 - 干掉他 好的
Ah! - Got him. Yes!
猜猜我2000投了谁
Okay. Guess who I voted for in 2000.
布♥什♥(也有阴毛之意)
Bush.
我最喜欢的组合啊
O-oh. My favorite band?
阴毛公敌
Pubic enemy.
不得不说啊 Tez 你这儿真不错
Gotta tell you, tez, some spread you got here.
我能冒昧问一句
Can I cross a line here and just ask how
你怎能过的起这样的生活吗
You can afford to live in a place like this?
如果你真想知道
If you must know,
Colleen现在是
Colleen got promoted to principal
约翰奈哈特小学的校长了
At john g. Neihardt elementary.
而且Alice
And it don't hurt that
给了我个两年的涨薪
Alice gave me a two-year pay bump at work.
啥
What?
Waymond 快出来去洗个澡
Waymond, get out this pool and take a shower!
我要跟你说多少次
How many times I gotta tell you?
我得跟你们说些事儿
Listen, I gotta tell you something.
好冷 Ders - 我跟你们说些事
It's cold, ders! - Let me tell you something.
你吃的能给我们些吗 - 停 不行
Can we get some of your food? - Guys, stop. No!
我就吃一小口你的三明治
Let me get a little bite of your sandwich!
刚刚有那么多
There was whole spread!
你们就不能趁还有的时候下手
You should've gotten some while it was hot.
不行 那得等个三十分钟才能游泳
No way. Then we'd have to wait 30 minutes to swim.
一群呆瓜等着我们去整呢
And we had to dunk some fools, man.
我整了不少 - 是吗 那肯定
I dunked so many fools! - Did you? I'm sure.
Waymond差点被淹死了 - 对 挺酷
Waymond almost drowned! - Yeah, that was cool.
好了 爱咋咋 我得跟你们说点事
Cool. All right, well, anyway, I gotta tell you something.
听着 Tez涨薪了
Listen, I guess tez just got a raise.
知道吗
All right?
Alice现在醉的很厉害
Now, Alice is over there. She's real drunk.
我们现在过去
We go over there now,
没准也能弄个涨薪 懂我意思了吗
Maybe we can get a raise. You feel me?
超懂
Aw, I feel you so much.
我能蘸一手指蛋黄酱吗
Can I just dip my finger in the mayonnaise?
腌黄瓜给我
Let me just get your pickle.
拿走 - 耶 我拿到腌黄瓜了
Take the pickle. - Yeah, I got a pickle!
我不喜欢蔬菜 我不在乎
I don't like vegetables, so that doesn't even matter to me.
是花色腌黄瓜 我讨厌花色腌黄瓜
Ugh, these are the neon ones. I hate neon pickles.
Alice 准备要来一炮了啊
Alice! Heading to pound town, huh?
没想到你这么会玩哦
I didn't know you were such a party beast.
你下次该来跟我们一起嗨
You should come, like, rage with us
来我们的 - 对
At our... nah. - Yep.
戒酒两年了 先生们
Two years of sobriety, gentlemen.
真好 - 哦
Good for you! - Oh!
两年了 白费
Two years, gone.
哦 这不好 - 对
Oh, it's a bad thing. - Yeah.
是啊
Oh, yeah. Ugh.
看到这房♥子 棒呆的社区
I saw this house and this awesome neighborhood,
然后就觉得 管他呢
And I was like... Pbbt! Screw it.
酒能消愁 好选择
Drink the pain away. Good call, good call.
猛♥男♥肘击来了 贱♥人♥们
Elbow drop from the top rope, bitches!
Alice 我觉得像你这么有才华
Alice, I believe a woman of your talents
有野心的女人值得拥有一切
And your ambitions deserves everything
你能想到最狂野的一切
In your wildest dreams.
你想到最狂野的是啥呀 Alice
What are your wildest dreams, alice?
Tez告诉我你给他涨了两年薪
Tez told me you gave him a two-year pay bump,
然后我就想吧... - 好
So I was thinking maybe... - fine.
好 - 哇
Fine. - Whoa.
工作狂（2011）
Workaholics
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