工作狂（2011）
Workaholics S02E06
Part 3
June 28, 2021, 1:30 p.m.
穿过外面这一群疯子
how to get past these psychos.
就这样 我们走 我们走
All right. Let's go. Let's go.
你们跟这玩意睡过了
Oh, you're (bleep) getting laid with that thing.
往后退 赶紧走啊
Get back! Let's just go.
可不想和这玩意做♥爱♥吧
Don't wanna have sex with this.
你肯定想
Yes. You do.
因为你是个淫♥荡♥的家伙
'Cause you're nasty.
好了 甜心 你只需要微笑 保持镇定
Okay, sweetie, I want you to just smile, be calm,
把它说出来
and just say it.
做个冷血的机器人 Jillian
Be a cold-blooded robot, Jillian.
不要害怕
No fear.
我很遗憾告诉你这个 不过你被
I'm sorry to tell you this, but you're...
说出来
Say it!
我做不到 她的表情太悲催了
I can't. Her face is too sad.
你可以的
Come on.
它不过是个仿真娃娃
It's just... it's a real doll.
它是Blake的朋友啊
It's Blake's friend.
你知道吗 美国已经
Do you realize that the United States
快要垮了
is on life support right now?
说话注意点啊你
Watch your mouth, bro.
我爸说国际经济竞争
My dad says that international economic competition
越来越热火朝天了
is heating up because the United States
因为美国的形势越来越不乐观了
is getting too fat and too lazy.
我爸说 我们觉得我们应该有工作
My dad says we think we deserve jobs.
实际上不是的
My dad says we don't.
你♥爸♥爸有没有解雇过谁啊
Does your dad ever fire people?
他已经在这个财政年度解雇了200多人了
My dad has fired over 200 people this fiscal year alone.
知道为什么吗
You wanna know why?
因为他想努力挽救这个国家
Because he's trying to save this country.
你不会哭了吧
Are you crying right now?
我才没哭
No, I'm not crying.
你还好吧
Are you all right?
都怪那个连体衣 我眼睛疼死了
It's the onesie. It's burning my eyes.
让开啦
Stop!
来抱抱吧
Wanna hug?
我去把我眼睛冲洗干净
I'm going to flush my eyes out.
你们来解决这事儿
Deal with this.
我有一个想法
Okay. I got an idea.
不如我们来个小小的演练
What if we do like a little scrimmage?
Adam 你演被解雇的人
Adam, you be the firee...
这说得通吗 我可是精英呢
That doesn't make much sense, kinda the Top Gun.
我就扮演解雇他的人
And I will be the firer, okay.
不管这家伙说什么还是妨碍我什么
And no matter what this guy says or throws my way, you know,
我都会坚定果断地炒他鱿鱼
I'll just power through and I'll fire the guy, okay?
很简单的 你准备好了吗
It's real easy. Are you ready?
准备好了 - 来演吧
I'm ready. - Okay. Let's get to it.
Adam 很遗憾地告诉你 我们必须得让你离开公♥司♥
Adam, I'm sorry to say this, but we got to let you go, bud.
你这是要解雇我吗
You're firing me?
我在这工作了60年 从零开始建立起这个公♥司♥
I work here for 60 years building this company from the ground up,
而你 却要炒我鱿鱼
and you firing me?
非常抱歉
Sorry, dude.
我才不会就这么默默离开 你这个贱♥人♥
I ain't going out like no bitch, you bitch.
Anders 你有什么消息没
Anders, you heard anything?
你知道吗 我不能丢了我的工作
I can't lose my job, you understand?
我不要回去当什么代课老师
I ain't going back to substitute teaching.
Montez 我眼睛现在疼得要死
Montez, my eyes are burning right now.
得了吧
Come on.
你们这些屁孩儿不知廉耻 不讲体面
You kids got no shame, no decency.
谢谢你的围裙了 兄弟
Thanks for this apron, man.
这支.44马格南手♥枪♥正指着你的脑袋呢
You got a .44 Magnum pointed at your head.
你[哔]的还敢造次
What the (bleep) are you doing?
你要把我解雇了 我就杀了你和这里的所有人
You fire me, I'll kill you and everybody in here.
Blake 照他说的做吧
Oh, do what he says, Blake.
你真以为我那么傻啊
You really think I'm that stupid?
你瞎扯什么呢
What are you talking about?
看看你的枪吧 神枪手
Check the gun, hotshot.
真聪明
Very clever.
真牛逼
Very clever.
你竟然拿走了枪里的子弹
You take the bullets out of my gun.
是啊
Yeah.
那看看你有没有能耐取出
But let's see if you can take the bullets
这蝴蝶刀里的子弹
out of this butterfly knife.
Jillian 给这个家伙一根烟
Jillian, go ahead and give this guy a cigarette,
我非把他点了不可
'cause I'm about to light him up.
你在推墨镜吗
Are those sunglasses?
是的 墨镜 - 好吧
Yeah, sunglasses. - Cool.
我要用火焰喷射器了
From my flamethrower.
天啊 不要
No, no.
你被炒了 - 不要
You're fired. - No!
你真心被炒糊了
You're so fired.
他就这么被炒了
And he's fired.
我就这么被解雇了 - 他的确被解雇了
And I'm fired. - And he's fired.
信息量真的好大 - 谢谢
That was very informative. - Thank you.
你们表演得太棒了
And a wonderful performance.
所有名字都在这了
All the names came in.
开始吧 亲爱的
Oh, here we go, baby.
看看谁被炒了
Who's gettin' chopped?
用你的方式
Jillian-style.
有Clint
Okay. Clint.
嗯 好 - 然后呢
Uh-hmm, yes. - Yeah.
Garth - 意料之中
Garth. - That makes sense.
Lois
Lois.
哦 那个人臭死了
Oh, the big stink.
恶心啊
Oh.
还有Adam - 啊
And Adam. - Hmm?
谁
Who?
DeMamp 是你
DeMamp. Oh.
我有点迷茫
I'm...I'm confused.
等等 我被炒了
Wait, I'm fired?
不是的
No.
那就好
Good.
你是将要被炒了
You're going to be fired.
[哔]
(Bleep)!
靠 是我
(Bleep)!Me!
是来真的
It's for real.
Jillian 你说说我帮了你多少次
Jillian, how many times have I saved your life, hmm?
不知道 六次吗
I don't know... six?
从来没有
Never!
以后也不会有了 因为我觉得我们是同事 是朋友
And I never will now because I thought we were work friends
但你却开除了我
and then you fire me.
你就像一个冷血机器人一样把我开除了
And then you fire me like a cold-blooded robot.
你就说了句 "嗯 你被开除了"
You're like, "Yeah, you're fired!"
我只是做了你让我做的事情
I was just doing what you told me to do.
什么时候起你竟然听我的话了
Since when have you listened to me?
我就是说说
I just talk.
我把我想的说出来
I just talk to hear myself think.
但是没人真正聆听过
Nobody actually listens to me.
知道吗 我站在这里说啊说然后
Hey, you know, I'm just here talking and...
这里为毛没有里斯巧克力
Why the (bleep) are there no Reese's pieces?
冷静 Adam
Okay, Adam...
我要他妈的里斯巧克力
You suck Reese's pieces.
你这是压力大才暴食的
Hey, you are stress-eating.
把薯片给我
Gimme the chips.
原味儿薯片 不是吧你
Plain potato chips, really?
你再拿一个吧
You can have one more.
我要把袋子收起来了
Now we are closing this.
太不可思议了
Unreal.
好了
Come on.
我相信这是一个天大的错误
I'm sure this is all just a big mistake.
我们要放松
Let's just relax.
工作狂（2011）
Workaholics
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