天才阿公（2013）

Uncle Grandpa S03E03

Part 2 Jan. 2, 2024, 6:39 p.m.

Sorry.
青少年吸血鬼小说同人文
给我们那本书
Give us that book!
秃头特♥供♥书
不要
No!
小鸭子
Lil' ducky!
你在哪小鸭子
Where are you, lil' ducky?
《激光束》
不错激光束
Oh, cool. Laser beams.
不好了激光束
Oh, no! Laser beams!
把书交出来
Give us the book!
《防卫术》
不对
Nope.
该死
Dang.
小鸭子
Lil' ducky.
还好我们戴头盔了
Good thing we're wearing helmets.
不对不对
Nope. Nope.
《可怕摩托事故》
不对
Nope.
你在这啊
There you are.
我想借出这本
I'd like to check out this b--
你先别急
Not so fast.
还给我
Give it back!
不要
No!
相信我千万别借出那本书
Just trust me. Don't check out that book.
没人可以命令我
Nobody tells me what to do...
我更不可以
...especially me.
我想借这本书
I'd like to check this out.
天才叔公
Uncle Grandpa!
其他几位天才叔公说得对
The other uncle grandpas were right
我可以证明
and I can prove it.
这是来自未来的视频
This is video from the future
内容是你把书借出去
showing what happens when you check out that book
没及时还的后果
and don't return it on time.
这本书逾期一周了
This book is a week overdue.
逾期费是一毛二
The late fee is 12 cents.
一毛二
12 cents!
谢谢你们警告我
Thanks for warning me, guys.
这下我知道这本书要放到
I know exactly where that book belongs...
垃圾堆里
In the trash.
还书箱
这下我们都达成了一项共识
Well, there's one thing we can all agree on.
绝对不要再进那家图书馆
We are never setting foot in that library. Ever again.
说的没错天才叔公
You can say that again, Uncle Grandpa.
再说一遍
这下我们都达成了一项共识
Well, there's one thing we can all agree on.
绝对不要再进那家图书馆
We are never setting foot in that library, ever again!
你们好
Hey, y'all.
我要去图书馆借书
I'm-a head over to the library to check out a book.
你们要一起来吗
You guys want to come?
好
Okay!
有人提到小奇迹了吗
Did somebody say, "tiny miracle"?
没有
Nope.
没什么事
Nah, we're good.
售罄
本周六晚上在市政大舞台
This Saturday night, at the civic arena
即将上演万众瞩目的
it's the outrageous comedy special
爆笑喜剧特别节目
the world has been waiting for.
大家好
Hey, y'all.
智人都怎么一回事
What the heck is going on with homo sapiens?
这里是格斯先生直播秀
It's Mr. Gus live!
格斯先生直播秀
恐龙统治地球的时代生活属实不易
When dinosaurs ran the planet, we had real problems --
摔进焦油坑
falling in tar pits
冰箱尺寸的蚊子
mosquitoes the size of refrigerators
在喷发的火山前边打架
fighting each other in front of exploding volcanoes.
现在智人们到处跑
Now you got homo sapiens running around
刷他们的破手♥机♥
flipping their dang flip-phones.
马文你收到我短♥信♥了吗
Hey, Marvin, did you get my text message?
很好笑因为特真实
It's funny 'cause it's true!
翼龙在哪
Where my 'dactyls at?
这场爆笑卖♥♥座秀绝对不容错过
It's the outrageous, sold-out show you won't want to miss.
格斯先生直播秀
我就说小妹
And I was all, "dang, girl!
我自从白垩纪就没看过这种发型了
I haven't seen a hairstyle like that
since the cretaceous period."
无意冒犯
No offense.
就是那小妹长得
I mean, this girl was like --
格斯先生
Mr. Gus!
格斯先生
Mr. Gus!
格斯先生格斯先生
Mr. Gus! Mr. Gus!
我要上厕所
I got to go potty.
天才叔公夜间秀
现在好莱怪碗现场直播
And now, live from the hollyweird bowl
这里是天才叔公夜间秀
it's an evening with Uncle Grandpa.
格斯先生我们厕纸用光了
Mr. Gus! We're all out of toilet paper!
真是太好吃了
That was quite delicious.