辛普森一家

The Simpsons S36E18

Part 3 Oct. 21, 2025, 3:32 p.m.

Lenny! - Mr. Leonard!
卡尔的朋友
Carl's friend!
他在那
There he is!
莱尼你在做什么
Hey, there, Lenny. What you doing?
你看我像在做什么
Oh, what's it look like I'm doing?
我坐在老谋子酒馆喝啤酒
I'm sitting at Moe's, having a beer.
可是莱尼老谋子酒馆在下面
But, Lenny, Moe's is down here.
这冰啤酒上还写了你的名字
And this frosty beer has your name on it.
天啊
Oh, boy.
行算是有点能耐
Okay, that was kind of impressive.
你可能还有点在乎这些人
I guess you sort of care about these guys,
尽管你也在压榨和欺骗他们
even if you are exploiting and defrauding them.
闭嘴
Oh, shut up.
你就会坐在大城市办公室里
All you do is sit in your big-city office
开张支票我在这却要干体力活
and send checks, while I'm here doing the heavy lifting,
具体就是每天把爸爸放在马桶上六次
by which I mean putting Dad on the toilet six times a day.
更难的是把他从马桶上弄下来
Even worse is getting him off that thing.
得拿根木棍才能摆脱吸力
You need a two-by-four to break the suction.
别说了
Stop it.
他们把他抓走了他们抓走了我的朋友
They took him! They took our friend!
把我们朋友救回来
Bring back our friend!
发生了什么事
What happened?
一个开厢式车的男人
Men in a van...
绑♥架♥了侯默
abducted Homer!
他们留下了这个
And they left this.
是老年保护服务这中心留的
It's from "Senior Protective Services."
侯默·杰·辛普森已经被我们羁押
"Homer J. Simpson has been placed in our custody,
依据是一桩投诉
"due to a complaint from...
投诉人是丽莎·辛普森
Lisa Simpson."
我只是我想说我从没想到...
I just... I-I mean, I never thought...
我想说
In my defense...
天啊
Oh, boy.
我们这里本来好好的
We had a good thing going here,
你就是非要来然后"杀"掉一切
but you just had to come and Lisa it up.
我没想到老年服务会把爸爸带走
I didn't know Senior Services would take Dad away.
我给他们打电♥话♥因为以为你处理的糟糕透顶
I called them when I thought you were horrible at this,
谁知道你偶尔还不错
and not just occasionally good
虽然还是很有问题
but still problematic.
你想知道最有问题的是什么吗
You want to hear something really problem?
我们可能再也见不到咱们的父亲了
We may never see our father again,
而且他在这儿比在养老院过得舒服多了
and he was doing way better here than at the retirement home.
所有这些人都是
All these guys are.
没错巴仔为我们带来了尊重和同理心
Yeah, Bart treats us with dignity and empathy.
也就是另两位不时前来拜访的脱衣舞娘
Those are the two other strippers who drop by sometimes.
行吧但你还是在从这些人手里偷钱
Okay, but you still stole from these guys,
也在偷我的
and from me.
我只拿了他们需要的部分
I only took the money required for their needs.
一辆科迈罗是吧
A Camaro?
我本来只想买♥♥辆电动自行车的
I wanted to get an electric bike,
但店员真是舌灿莲花
but the guys insisted.
他还让我们打了蜡
He lets us wax it.
这宝贝和厄拉科斯星一样红
It is as red as the planet Arrakis.
《沙丘》的梗
Dune reference.
巴仔会带我们兜风直到我们睡着
Bart drives us around till we fall asleep.
是的我想撤销
Yes, I'd like to withdraw my complaint
对我父亲居住环境的投诉
about my father's living conditions.
他的名字是侯默·辛普森
His name is Homer Simpson.
很抱歉女士
I'm sorry, ma'am.
《老年护理规章》是这么规定的
If I may read from the Elder Care Regulations:
"不许反悔"
"no backsies."
您的父亲目前正被送往
Your father is currently being transported to...
佛罗里达
Florida.
不那儿已经成老人的重度警戒监狱了
No! That's become a maximum-security prison for old folks.
老人们都被关在那儿
The old men are all kept here.
佛罗里达狭地因为气候变化凹陷了不少
Climate change really sagged out the panhandle.
从未有人跑出来过
No one ever gets out of there.
我们该怎么办
What are we going to do?
我不知道让我想想
I don't know. Give me space to think.
快想 -快想啊丽莎
Think! - Think, Lisa!
快把分散你注意力的东西都赶走好好想
Just cut out all distractions and think.
快点赶紧的
Think faster! Think now!
用你的脑子想啊你在想吗
Use your brain and think! Are you thinking?
快想快想快想快-点-想-啊
Think! Think! Think! - Think-think-think-think-think!
肯定有办法能把老爹带回来的
There's got to be some way to get Dad back.
后进生我超自豪的哦
他干嘛还留着这个
Ugh, why would he keep this?
他还觉得这种东西很酷吗
Does he think it's still cool?
请在我去世或转世后拆阅
这是老妈的笔迹还有措辞
This is Mom's handwriting. And phrasing.
马姬·辛普森的精神遗嘱
"Marge Simpson Emotional Will?"
还没人见过这个
No one has ever seen this.
侯默万一我是说万一
Homer, in the very unlikely circumstance
我比你先死
that I die before you,
请记住我并没有真的离去
please know that I'll always be there,
我在油煎培根的嘶嘶声里
in the sizzle of your bacon,
在啤酒的泡沫里
the bubble of your beer
在所有会把你提前带走的东西里
and in all the other things that will kill you
这样我们就能再次相聚了
so that we can be together again.
阿麦我的小话匣子
Maggie, my little chatterbox,
我希望你真的成为了
I hope you achieved your goal
你想当的农场设备拍卖♥♥师
of becoming an auctioneer for farm equipment.
她成功了
She did.
巴仔和丽莎很多年以前
And Bart and Lisa, many years ago,
我让你们互相依靠不要分道扬镳
I told you both to lean on each other and not drift apart.
我诚挚地希望你们照顾好彼此
My dearest hope is that you're looking out for each other
共同度过人生的旅程
and sharing a lifelong journey together.
我们完全没这么做
We didn't do any of that stuff.
因为我是个烂人
Because I suck.
我们都是烂人
We both suck.
你真的把这些老人照顾得很好
You really have done a good job with these guys.
是的你是买♥♥了辆豪车
And yes, you bought a fancy car,
但我想挥霍一次也没什么大不了的
but I suppose it's okay to splurge on one thing.
托尼·迪拜金色水上摩托艇
你知道吗妈妈虽然走了
You know what? Mom may be gone,
但我们仍然可以合作进行"外科切除手术"
but we can still make her wishes come true
让她的愿望成真
by collaborating on a surgical extraction operation.
什么 -一次无敌救援任务
Huh? - A kick-ass rescue mission.
*今晚将会有一场越狱*
* Tonight, there's gonna be a jailbreak *
你能把音乐调小点吗
Can you turn down the music?
不能摇滚乐能帮我加速
No can do. Rocking tunes help me haul ass.
*今晚巴仔要救爸爸*
* Tonight, Bart's gonna do a Dad-break *
*所以你不要靠近*
* So don't you be around *
他们在那里
There they are.
佛罗里达
迷航快车
爸爸爸爸 -爸爸爸爸
Dad! Dad! - Dad! Dad!
是我们 -你的孩子
It's us! - It's your kids!
巴仔丽莎
Hi, Bart and Lisa.
因为我很聪明所以我能免费搭巴士
I'm getting a free bus ride because I'm smart.
别朝他们挥手他们可能是逃犯
Don't wave at them. They might be escaped prisoners.
格雷迪丝这太荒谬了
Oh, Gladys, that's ridiculous.
*今晚将会有一场越狱*
* Tonight, there's gonna be a jailbreak *
加速
Step on it!
欢迎来到佛罗里达
我们会把你的尸体喂鳄鱼
一旦他们越过州界我们就再也见不到爸爸了
Once they cross over the state line, we'll never see Dad again.
巴仔记得我们最爱的《傻猫和坏鼠》剧情吗
Bart, remember our favorite Itchy and Scratchy?
你是说阿痒复活泰·柯布的尸体
You mean the one where Itchy reanimates the corpse of Ty Cobb
让他尖钉先滑进小挠的脸那一幕吗
so he can slide spikes-first into Scratchy's face?
不另一个
No, our other favorite.
对啊就这么干
Right. Let's do it.
停车我要下车 -停车
Pull over, I gotta go! - Pull over!
紧急如厕 -我要尿尿我憋不住了
Potty emergency! - I can't hold it, I gotta take a leak!
先憋着伙计们我们快到了
Now, just hold it in, pallies. We're almost there.