辛普森一家
The Simpsons S36E18
Part 1
Oct. 21, 2025, 3:32 p.m.
《辛普森一家》
第三十六季 第十八集
[本季终]
四年前
《半秃月刊》
帅气皇家发际线
我去商场了
I'm going to the market.
你能看下孩子吗
Can you look after the kids?
没问题
I'm on it.
别偷懒把孩子扔到电视机前
And don't just plop them in front of the TV,
吃小蛋糕 然后小睡
eat Twinkies, and take a nap.
侯默 我们太无聊了 -需要干点事情
Homer, we're bored. - We need something to do.
把孩子扔到电视机前
Plop them in front of the TV.
吃小蛋糕 然后小睡
Eat Twinkies. Take a nap.
自己再喝点小酒
Maybe catch up on your drinking.
我要看那个推土机的节目
I want to watch a show about bulldozers.
应该把独角兽加进去
But it should have unicorns in it.
对 推土机碾压独角兽
Right. Bulldozers crushing unicorns.
汗津津的小丑 -汗津津的小丑
Sweaty ugly clown. - Sweaty ugly clown.
孩子们好
Hey-hey, kids!
现在播放《傻猫和坏鼠》
It's time for Itchy and Scratchy.
*他们又打又咬*
* They fight and bite *
*他们又打又咬又打*
* They fight and bite and fight... *
这动画叫《傻猫和坏鼠》
This cartoon is called Itchy and Scratchy?
没错 跟你屁屁重名
Yeah, it's named after your butt.
这个梗可以啊
Whoa, nice one.
《傻猫和坏鼠》
在芝麻街
今天的节目主题是和我
Today's show is brought to you by the letter "F,"
"和我"火
which stands for "Fire."
还有吃
And the number eight,
傻猫阿挠"吃"的馅饼里有炸♥弹♥
as in, "Scratchy 'ate' a pie with a bomb in it."
剧终
傻猫阿挠和坏鼠阿痒
The Itchy and Scratchy Show.
真不错啊
That was awesome.
我们永远都要一起看这部动画
Let's watch this show together every day forever.
蛋糕拉钩 -蛋糕拉钩
Twinkie promise. - Twinkie promise.
百万伏特
《傻猫和坏鼠》
在奥♥运♥会
*他们又打又咬*
* They fight and bite *
阿痒斯坦[俄文]
*他们又打又咬又打*
* They fight and bite and fight *
*打打打 咬咬咬*
* Fight, fight, fight, bite, bite, bite *
*傻猫和坏鼠*
* The Itchy and Scratchy Show. *
现在
有东西给你们看
I've got something to show you.
是你们的妹妹
It's your little sister in her new
穿着《傻猫和坏鼠》连体服
Itchy and Scratchy ensemble.
恶心 -恶
Ack! - Ack!
现在《傻猫和坏鼠》开始出婴儿衣服了吗
They make Itchy and Scratchy clothes for babies now?
不止是衣服
And not just clothes.
还有玩具 拨浪鼓 奶嘴
They've got toys, rattles, binkies,
连便盆都有
and even a potty.
春田小学
《傻猫和坏鼠》是给婴儿看的
Itchy and Scratchy is for babies!
婴儿
Babies!
你的小宝贝会爱上
《傻猫和坏鼠》
《傻猫和坏鼠》地球仪
你为什么不跟巴仔看《傻猫和坏鼠》了
Why aren't you watching Itchy and Scratchy with Bart?
因为那个动画根本就不酷
Um, because that show is completely uncool?
现在我和朋友们都在连刷
Right now, my friends and I are bingeing this show
《电视节目的黄金年代 2013》
from the golden age of television: 2013.
《怪女孩》
舒尔茨 你养了条狗狗吗
Aw, Schultz. You got a dog?
真可爱
Cute.
我只是借他泡妞
I just borrowed him to meet ladies.
我用来打引号♥的手指
My finger-quote fingers.
我真的"好痛痛"呀
I am in "Terrible pain."
*有时候一只色狗真的被狗咬*
* Sometimes a horndog gets bit by a real dog *
她让可爱姑娘变漂亮不是罪
She made it okay for cute girls to be pretty.
好的吧 难道就没有别的事儿
Okay, but isn't there something else
你可以和哥哥一起做吗
you could do with your brother?
有意思的想法
Interesting idea.
我问问小分队然后告诉你
I'll circle back with my team and let you know.
那意思就是没有了
That always means no.
你又在看什么电视节目
And what television program are you watching?
《尖叫老友记》
很明显 玩笑开得很棒
Obviously, the jokes are great,
然而我钟意的是故事叙述
but what I love is the storytelling.
行 或许你可以和丽莎一起享受
All right, maybe that's something you could enjoy with Lisa?
马姬 丽莎和我拥有过的是很特别
Marge, what Lisa and I had was so special,
但我们都往前看了
but we've both moved on.
你出去的时候 帮我个忙把这个扔进垃圾桶
On your way out, do me a favor and drop this in the garbage.
你真可人
You're a doll.
我知道孩子们在长大
I knew my kids were growing up,
但我没想到他们会渐行渐远
but I never thought they'd grow apart.
而且我觉得只有我在乎
And I think I'm the only one who cares.
我们在乎 马姬 -我们在乎 马姬
We care, Marge. - We care, Marge.
*当巴仔和丽莎爱我们的时候*
* When Bart and Lisa loved us *
*一切都那么美好*
* Things were just so beautiful *
*血液横流 但同时*
* Blood would flow but also *
*爱也流淌*
* So would love *
*他们会笑我们的暴♥力♥*
* They'd laugh at all our violence *
*以及少♥儿♥不♥宜♥的恐怖*
* And horrors quite unsuitable for children *
*内脏如雨*
* As guts rained *
*倾盆而下*
* From above *
*可是有一天 一切都变了*
* But then one day, things weren't the same *
*宝宝爱我们*
* Babies loved us *
*我们逊毙了*
* We were lame *
*以前和彼此共度这么多时光*
* Used to spend so much time with each other *
*现在他们看着都不像兄妹*
* And now they barely seem like sister brother *
*这可碎了他们甜美可爱妈妈的心*
* And it breaks the heart of their sweet, loving mother *
*现在巴仔和丽莎*
* Now that Bart and Lisa *
*不再爱我们*
* Don't love us *
《半秃月刊》
迈克尔·基顿所剩无几的毛
你有没有注意到巴仔和丽莎
Have you noticed that Bart and Lisa
最近都没有一起玩
don't hang out these days?
他们几乎都不对彼此说话了
They barely even speak anymore.
没错 如果可以允许 我提个抗辩
Yeah, but if I may pose a counterargument:
你要做甚
Eh, whaddya gonna do?
我不想巴仔和丽莎成为那种
I don't want Bart and Lisa to be the kind of siblings
彼此不再说话渐行渐远的兄妹
who stop speaking and drift apart.
是的你可能是对的
Yeah, maybe you're right.
我们不想他俩变成侠盗猎车手里的
We don't want them to end up like Sweet Johnson
斯维特·约翰森和卡尔·约翰森兄弟
and CJ Johnson in Grand Theft Auto.
我从没玩过那个游戏
I've never played that game.
马姬 你在洛圣都长大
Marge, when you grow up in Los Santos,
大烟哥要你运送某些药粉
and Big Smoke needs you to move that powder,
游戏自有套路玩弄你
the game has a way of playing you.
孩子们 我能跟你们说几句吗
Kids. Kids, can I talk to you for a second?
你们的爸爸和我不会永远在身边
Your father and I won't be around forever.
你们年岁越长 就会需要互相扶持
When you get older, you'll need to lean on each other.
不管你们做什么 不要渐行渐远
Whatever you do, don't drift apart.
你们彼此共享的旅途
You share a journey with your siblings
没有别人可以理解
that no one else will ever understand.
你们务必千万不要把这当作理所当然
You must never, ever, ever take that for granted.
你在这儿跟我们说这些 那谁去煎煎饼啊
If you're telling us all this, who's flipping the pancakes?
妈妈 我们明白你的意思
Mom, we get what you're saying,
我认为 我也发誓
I think, and I promise,
我们会铭记于心
we'll keep it in mind.
*但他们没有听马姬的话*
* But they didn't heed Marge *
*他们渐渐疏远了*
* They drifted apart *
*丽莎征服世界*
* Lisa conquered the world *
*可怜的巴仔还是那个巴仔*
* And poor Bart remained Bart *
*他们的关系结束了*
Their relationship died
*无人为此哀悼*
* With no one to grieve it *
*因为马姬死在侯默前面*
* 'Cause Marge passed before Homer *
马姬·辛普森
挚爱的妻子 母亲 腌肉调味大♥师♥
辛普森一家
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