辛普森一家

The Simpsons S36E09

Part 4 May 21, 2025, 8:41 p.m.

下周在水泥湖玩摩托艇彩弹射击老壳
Jet Ski paintball next weekend at Concrete Lake, K-dawg!
你来吗 -不会错过的
You in? - Wouldn't miss it.
这里是《你本人就是问题》
It's The Problem Is You
季终重聚特别集
Season Finale Reunion Special!
欢迎大家
Welcome!
在我们大热的第一季解决了很多问题
On our first hit season, we solved a lot of problems.
他们现在都来了
And here they are now!
大家最近怎么样
So, how's everybody doing?
那个当你发现你是问题所在
Yes, well, when you find out that you're the problem,
尽管你赌咒发誓
even though you could have sworn...
包括你的每个细胞都在说
and I mean with every fiber of your being...
问题是其他人带来的时候就很怎么说
that it was the other guy, it's very, well,
我说不好可能是解脱了说不好
I don't know, freeing? I don't know.
我对珀西瓦尔曾经管的特别严
I was so controlling of Percival.
但我现在就让它自♥由♥走动
But now I just let him roam free.
塞迪阿姨你改变了我们所有人的人生
Oh, Aunt Sadie, you changed all our lives.
你之前让马姬停止了对我们多年来的破坏
Once you helped Marge step back from decades of sabotaging us,
对她来说太有益了
it's been so good for her.
对吗亲爱的 -很对
Right, honey? - That's right.
我说句实话
I'm gonna be honest.
我有那么一段时间都觉得
There was a time when I thought
可能是我们做错了什么
maybe we were doing something wrong.
结果我们完全无责
But we were completely blameless.
我没这么想就是我的错
Not me. I'm to blame.
问题就在于马姬
The problem is Marge.
之前所有的马姬姐姐们让我困扰的事
All those things that used to bother me about Marge's sisters,
都不再困扰了
they just don't anymore.
比如说我记得
I can remember, for example,
原来我一直都受不了
when I wouldn't be able to stand
他现在呼吸的这个样子
the way he's breathing right now.
是是我呼吸声音太吵吗
Oh. W-Was I breathing loud?
抱歉 -现在我不再嫌他烦了
I'm sorry. - Doesn't bother me either.
很好因为你眉毛里的烟灰
Good, because the cigarette ash in your eyebrows
也不会让我嫌烦
doesn't bother me.
我才不会坐在这想着
I'm not sitting here, thinking,
"怎么会那么多烟灰呢"
"How could there be so much of it?"
久美子和我说说
Kumiko, tell me,
你丈夫还会一直跳过剧集的"前情提要"吗
is your husband still skipping the episode "previously on"s
哪怕你觉得提要很有用
even though you find them helpful?
你想知道什么不会再让我嫌烦了吗
You want to know something else that doesn't bother me?
就是他只会剪左手的指甲
That he only cuts his fingernails on his left hand.
我是右撇子所以左手不会用指甲刀
I'm a righty, so I can't use the clippers with my left!
再说一次这不会让我们烦恼了
Again, it doesn't bother us.
马姬你要不要介入一下
Marge, you want to step in here?
你是说把你们分开吗
You mean separate you?
不我不要
Oh, no. No, not me.
我再也不会这么做了
I don't do that anymore.
你真让我恶心
You disgust me!
整理下仪表吧 -你先
Groom yourself! - You first!
你们不能在重聚节目上大吼蠢货
You don't yell at a reunion show, you sick morons!
看看这些我拯救了的废物吧
Look at these losers I cured.
小气鬼搞定了
Cheapskate... fixed!
恋父情结搞定了
Daddy issues... fixed!
阳痿的
Impotent...
妥协了
came to terms with.
你什么都没搞定
You fixed nothing!
你只是用简单的流行语掩盖了真正的问题
You plaster over real problems with an easy catchphrase.
这三个人刚见面就一直讨厌对方
These three have hated each other since the moment they met,
你只是给了他们一个
and all you did was give them a reason
不会感到内疚的理由
to not feel guilty about it.
别和我谈内疚
Don't talk to me about guilt.
内疚是我发明的
I invented guilt!
不轮到我大吼大叫
No! It's my turn to yell!
指指点点了
And point and point and point!
你无法在三十分钟内解决关系问题
You can't solve relationships in 30 minutes.
那需要每一方很多年持续不断的努力
It requires years of constant hard work
和深刻的自我反思
and deep self-reflection from all parties!
我没答应要自我反思啊
I didn't sign up for self-reflection.
你还想让我为婚姻努力
Now you want me to work at my marriage?
我要离开你
Oh, I'm leaving you.
还要把哈巴狗带走
And I'm taking the pugs!
我是马姬·辛普森
I'm Marge Simpson,
问题不是我
and the problem is not me.
我明白了
I see it now.
问题也不是我
The problem's not me either.
我不该想和为我工作的人
I was wrong to try to form human connections
建立人际关系
with the people that work for me!
我觉得你不应该得出这个结论
Well, I don't think that's the lesson.
我为什么要花时间和低级别的人相处
Why should I spend time with anyone below the line?!
级别的存在是有意义的
The line is there for a reason.
级别是绝对的正义
The line is an absolute good!
级别就是生活的意义
The line is life!
我就知道这家伙很虚伪
I always knew that guy was a phony.
我们去用他的寿司擦屁♥股♥吧
Hey, let's go rub our butts on his sushi.
你们敢走
Don't you leave me!
我要靠你们这些精神病撑满一小时呢
I've got an hour to fill with you mental cases!
你本人就是问题
你们需要我来吼你们
You need my yelling!
塞迪·克拉斯托夫斯基问题是一个大标牌
请节哀阿壳
I'm so sorry for your loss, Krusty.
谁允许你和我说话了
Who said you could talk to me?
剧组人生
又来了
Oh! Here we go.
那位是吉米
That's Jimmy!
如果你像我一样爱吃贝类
If you're like me and you love shellfish
又不着急的话你知道94%的蛤蜊
and you're not in a hurry, did you know that 94% of clams
完全能在三个工作日后就安心食用吗
are perfectly safe to eat after three business days?
所以如果下次到了周三
So the next time it's Wednesday
而你想在下周一吃蛤蜊的话
and you feel like having clams on the following Monday,
访问三日蛤蜊网就好
visit 3DayClams.Com.
订购一打小帘蛤
Order a dozen littlenecks
还附赠一个开壳器
and get a shucker for free.
不过放了三天的蛤蜊
Though with three-day-old clams,
一般自己就会开了
they practically open themselves.
只要尝一口你就会赞叹
One taste and you'll say, "Wow,
这些蛤蜊可真够新鲜的
these clams are fresh enough."
在订购三日蛤蜊之前请咨♥询♥你的医生
Consult your physician before ordering 3 Day Clams.
阅读三日蛤蜊网站的条款和限制
See terms and restrictions at 3DayClams.Com.
遇到配送和或食物中毒问题
Delivery and or food poisoning concerns?
请拨♥打♥1-555-蛤蜊-求助电♥话♥
Call 1-555-clam-help.
三日蛤蜊不宣扬
3 Day Clams is not an endorsement
食用放了三天的蛤蜊
of eating three-day-old clams.