异空漫游（2015）

Other Space S01E07

Part 5 June 28, 2021, 1:10 p.m.

总把你扫到角落里
it's like we sweep you under a rug or something.
是的我之前说过
Yeah, I said that earlier.
嗯不管你是对谁说的
Well, whoever you said it to,
我真希望他们听进去了
I hope they listened.
我是所有人中最差劲的
And I'm worst of anyone, you know?
我勾搭了你然后又无视你
I hook up with you and then I ignore you
听到你和Tina的事就失控了
and then I hear about you and Tina and I lose it.
尽管那和我毫无关系
Even though it has nothing to do with me in the first place.
也许你是对的
Maybe you're right, you know?
如果我就这样对待朋友那我活该被炒
If this is how I treat my friends, maybe I should be fired.
好了我要做裁决了
Okay, I'm ready to make a decision.
你刚刚讲得很好
That was a nice speech.
但我还是没听到"对不起"
But I still didn't hear a sorry.
总忘记那句该死的"对不起"
I always forget the stupid sorry.
好了我已经做出裁定了
Okay, I have reached a verdict.
那么如果我判定Karen败诉
So, if I find against Karen,
那她会即刻被免职
then she will be immediately de-commissioned.
因此作为飞船上的唯一♥平♥民
Okay, so as a mere civilian on this ship,
她没有任何权利和权限
she has no rights, no privileges.
等下我有话要说 - 嗯哼
Wait, I wanna say something. - Mm-hm?
我把UMP的规章制度扯进来是不对的
I was wrong to bring UMP rules and regulations into this,
但是太空探险实在太艰难了
but space exploration is hard.
有时我觉得没人在意
Sometimes I feel like no one cares
我说的话
about what I have to say.
但今天
But today,
我发现我的朋友
I discovered that my friends
还是会多多少少听我说的话
do sort of listen to me.
所以根据UMP规章第阿尔法章第7条
So in accordance with UMP regulation alpha seven,
我想要撤回 - 驳回撤回
I would like to withdraw... - Withdraw denied.
好啦准备接受制裁吧孩儿
Great. You about to get sanctioned, son.
啥 - 除了Michael之外还有其他被受害者好吗
What? - There are other parties that got hurt besides Michael, okay?
你在说什么啊
What are you talking about?
哦天呐别装作你忘记了
Oh my God, don't act like you don't remember.
学院大一那年
Freshman year at the academy?
最后的舞会上我们共享一瓶金箔酒
Last chance dance, we shared a bottle of Goldschlager,
你把我的马桶染成金箔色
and you goldleafed my toilet.
我把你带回我的卧室
And I brought you back to my bedroom,
我对你可是特别"大方"
and I was very generous to you.
你生气的是我们有过一段吗
You're mad about our hook up?
我照顾了你
I took care of you.
然后我就想她也会照顾我的吧
And then I was like is she gonna take care of me?
不应该不会因为她那么自私
No, I guess not, cuz she's selfish.
但是接着你去照顾Michael了
But then you took care of Michael.
现在我内心是崩溃的
Now, I'm like what the hell?
你对我生气是因为我和Tina上♥床♥
You're mad at me for having sex with Tina,
而你也和她上过
when you had sex with Tina too?
搞什么啊
I mean, come on.
我们都喝醉了场面很尴尬
We were drunk, it was super awkward.
我觉得我很棒
I thought I was great.
你不赖
You weren't bad.
Michael 就一晚上好吧
Michael, it was one night, all right.
我也只和Tina处了一晚上
I spent one night with Tina too.
只是那一晚相当于几个月因为非
Only that one night was several months because of the non...
好了好了
All right, all right.
我找到啦
I found it.
我几次临近成功又失败了
I've been to the edge and back,
但是我终于找到证据
but I have proof
有外星人试图联♥系♥我们
that there's an alien trying to contact us.
Stewart 你看去就像坨屎
Stewart, you look like shit.
我感觉正相反
Well, I feel like the opposite of shit.
那是尿
That's pee.
屎的反义词是食物
The opposite of shit is food.
Art 到这儿来
Art, come on get in here.
播放最后一个梦境的视频
Now play the recording of the last dream I had.
你确定要这样做么 Stewart
Are you sure you want to do this Stewart?
这些是未经处理的素材
It's pretty raw stuff.
哦没事的我不会害羞的
Oh no, it's okay. I'm not ashamed.
不不我不再害羞了
No, no, not anymore.
吸引外星人的不是春梦
The alien wasn't attracted to sex dreams.
而是爱情
He was attracted to love.
你越说越诡异 Stewart
You're freaking me out, Stewart.
还有我们刚发现
Also we just found out
你姐姐和你最好的朋友都和Tina做过爱
that your sister and your best friend have both made love with Tina.
什么
What?
我不太懂婉转的说法他们都上过她
I don't know the euphemisms. They both made sex on her?
兄弟法则呢
What about bro code?
姐妹法则呢
What about sis code?
现在开始播放
Just pushing play now.
不不第一次接触什么的都好傻别放了
No, no, you know, this whole first contact thing is so stupid, let's not.
太迟了已经开始了
Too late, I already pushed it.
为什么我在你的梦里 Stewart
Why am I in your dream, Stewart?
这片里真的有外星人吗
Is there really an alien in here
还是只说明你急需帮助
or is this just a horrific cry for help?
快进 Art 直接跳过这边拜托了
Just skip Art, just skip forward, please.
我爱你
I love you.
让我怀孕吧
Put a baby inside me.
Stewart Lipinski 舰长
Captain Stewart Lipinski
按照以下频率激活信标
activate a beacon on the following frequency.
正在接收频率舰长
Receiving frequencies, Captain.
你改成她的姓吗
Did you take her name?
别告诉老妈
Don't tell Mom.
听着我要和你说声对不起
Listen, I owe you an apology.
和Karen的事教会了我很多
That thing with Karen really taught me a lot.
有时候朋友间还是该谈心
Sometimes friends should just talk.
我应该告诉Tina的事情的
I should have told you about Tina.
Stewart 外星人来了
Stewart, alien's here.
等等说好的交心时刻呢
Wait, wait, I thought we were gonna have a moment.
Michael 有外星人啊
Michael there's an alien.
不过如果你愿意
But if you want
你可以呆在这儿说说你的想法
you can stay here and say what you want to say.
对着一个空房♥间吗
To an empty room?
你不介意那事了吗
You'd be okay with that?
说完了记得锁下门谢啦
Just lock up after you're done. Thanks.