迈克和茉莉（2010）

Mike & Molly S05E16

Part 2 Dec. 15, 2020, 4:38 p.m.

when it's time to meet the public.
把我们这些土包子藏起来
That is not true.
没有的事
Oh, please.
哦拜托
The last parent-teacher conference I even heard about was fifth grade.
上一次我听说有家长会还是你五年级的时候
That's because you would never wear underwear.
还不是因为你从不♥穿♥内衣
You'd sit in those little desks, showing it to the world.
你坐在那小书桌上向全世界展现"内在美"
You got straight A's, didn't you?
你的成绩一直是A 不是吗
Because I studied.
那是因为我好好学了
We'll never know.
谁知道呢
Boy, those wasps really got me good, huh?
那些黄蜂真是给够我颜色看了
Well, at least I'll have a fun story to tell at your party.
至少派对上我有趣事说了
Oh, maybe you shouldn't tell that one.
也许不说这个事比较好
Why not?
为什么不
Mike, you got your ass kicked by a bunch of wasps.
Mike 你屁♥股♥被一群黄蜂蛰了
I know. That's why it's funny.
我知道啊这才好笑嘛
Besides, you know, you get beat fair and square,
另外当你输得心服口服时
you got to tip your hat to the victor.
你得向赢家脱帽致敬
Yeah, but are they laughing with you or...
但他们是和你一起笑好呢还是
Hey, laughing's laughing. And they're gonna love the part
笑就是笑好么他们会爱上
where I Aqua Netted Vince's eyelashes shut.
我用发胶把Vince的睫毛黏上了的那段故事的
I wish I could've seen that.
我真希望我能看到那幕
Yeah, so does Vince.
Vince也是
Oh, yeah...
哦是么
You know what? I-I don't think this is gonna be the...
你知道么我不觉得这会是
the kind of party where people are telling stories and...
人们交流故事的那种派对
I thought it was a party for up-and-coming storytellers.
我以为是说故事新秀的派对呢
It is, it is.
是的没错
But, you know, that's their job.
但你要知道那是他们的工作
They're off the clock. Let's give 'em the night off.
他们下班了给他们消停一会吧
Well, I gotta talk about something. Do you?
我总得说点什么呀是吗
What? What?
你说啥你说啥
No,
不是
I'm-I'm just saying,
我就是说
these people are so full of themselves,
他们特别自我
they're gonna do most of the talking.
他们会一直说个不停
You just have to sit there
只需要你坐那
and listen and just pretend to be interested. That's it.
听着假装很有兴趣这就够了
It's easy. I do it with her all the time.
这简单我跟她一直这样
Ma.
妈
No, she's-she's not wrong.
没她没说错
A little mean,
话有点刻薄
but not wrong.
但在理
You know,
你懂的
these people just...
这些人不过是
they're always trying to one-up you.
永远想超过你一截
It's not a conversation. It's a competition.
不是来聊天的是来攀比的
I got you.
我懂了
It's like when Carl starts talking about R & B music.
就像Carl开始聊R&B音乐一样
You know what I do?
知道我怎么对付他么
I rub my nose, hinting that he has a booger.
我就揉鼻子暗示他有鼻屎
Then that's all he can think about.
然后他就满脑子都是鼻屎了
Yeah, and then instead of going on and on
他也就不会喋喋不休地聊Marvin Gaye的父亲
about Marvin Gaye's dad, he's running for a napkin.
而是会去找纸巾了
Yeah, I... I don't know
好吧不过我不确定
that these are the types of people
派对上的那些人
that you're gonna throw off with a phantom booger.
是不是能用虚幻鼻屎摆脱掉的类型
You know?
你知道么
They'll just assume you have one.
他们只会以为你有鼻屎
Which you kind of do, by the way.
顺便说一句你真的有
Nah, that's just a big hair.
不那就是根长鼻毛
I'll yank it in the parking lot when we get there.
等到了我就拔了它
Oh!
噢
Thanks, Ma.
谢了妈
Oh.
哦
Uh, no railing.
啊没栏杆啊
Very... very chic.
挺挺别致的
There's no way this meets code.
这绝对不符合安全规范
Ma, hold my arm. I'm fine.
妈抓住我的胳膊我没事
Not for you; for me.
不是为了你是为我
This place is beautiful.
这地儿真美
You think they got the game on somewhere?
这有打游戏的地方么
Mike, these kinds of people don't watch television.
Mike 这些人连电视都不看的
If they ask, neither do we.
如果他们问起来我们也不看
How about a fish tank?
那有鱼缸么
Anything to look at?
有能盯着看的东西么
Well, this has been fun.
哦这挺有趣的
Ready to go? No.
可以走了么不可以
We gotta stick around until the new author announcements.
我们要待到公布新作家才行
That's the whole reason we came.
这才是我们来的原因
Fine. I got to get a few drinks in me
行吧我得灌点酒下去
if they're gonna parade me up and down
如果他们想上下打量我
like a shih tzu at a dog show.
像打量狗展上的西施犬一样
I think that statue just moved.
我觉得那雕像刚刚动了
That's because it's a real person.
那是因为是真人
No! Are you serious?
不是吧你确定
Mike, leave him alone.
Mike 你别碰人家
Remember the robot cowboy in the park?
还记得公园里的牛仔机器人么
You kept blowing in his ear... he didn't like it.
你一直对着他耳朵吹气但人家不喜欢
Well, if you can't stay in character,
如果装不好要扮演的角色
don't paint yourself silver.
就别把自己刷成银色的啊
Oh, my God, I think that's Jean Thompson.
我的老天我想那是Jean Thompson
She wrote .
她写的<我们离家那一年>
Well, this will be the year that I don't read that.
那今年就是我不读那书的一年
She's coming this way.
她来这边了
Maybe you should go find your mother.
你去找一下你妈比较好
All right, fine, but I'll come back
好吧但是如果她很无聊的话
and rescue you if she's as boring...
我会回来拯救你的
Yeah, yeah, yeah, fine, fine, fine.
嗯嗯嗯好好好
All right.
那好吧
You're good.
你真牛
Not so fast. What have we got here?
别急着走有什么吃的呀
Baked crab on wontons.
烤蟹肉云吞
Mmm.
嗯
Why didn't you tell me it was real crab?
你怎么不说是真蟹肉
Oh, what do we have here?
哇这有什么好吃的
Real crab. All right, keep it moving.
真蟹肉算了你走吧
So this is your new crowd, huh, Ma?
妈你就跟这群人待着了哈
You kidding? I'm only here because I have to.
你逗我吗我是被迫的好么
I got nothing in common with these poseurs,
我跟这些装腔作势的人完全不一样
kissing each other's asses.
只会互拍马屁
Wait a minute.
等一下
I think that's the lady
我觉得她就是
who wrote .
写<炖锅秘籍>的那个人
Oh, is that where you got that tamale casserole?
你从那偷学做墨西哥砂锅鸡的是不
Yep, yep, yep. Bye, bye, bye.
是是是走走走
See, I didn't find the piece so much about desolation
我觉得这作品并不是很
as loneliness. Mmhmm.
凄凉悲怆嗯
I...
我
I mean, what I... what I was saying is that, uh,
我我是说嗯
underneath it all, it's really just a-a sobering
在它外表之下它描述了发人深思的
account of the human condition.
人类状态
What is?
那是啥
We were just discussing
我们刚刚在聊
her powerful short story.
她极具有感染力的短篇小说
Oh, I love short stories!
我最爱短篇小说了
Better yet... A minute mystery.
<可以更好><一分钟疑案>
Any of you guys ever write one of those?
是你们中谁写的么
I mean, I know I'm a cop,
我知道我是个警♥察♥
but I'm always surprised by who did it.
但每次最后知道是谁做的我都会被惊到
Ah, you are such a stitch!
哈你真是可爱啊