冒牌牧师（2015）

Yes, wow, okay. Good memory.
是的 哇哦 好吧 你记忆力真好
Uh, married 15 years now. Three beautiful kids.
额 我们结婚已经有15年了 有三个美丽的孩子
And a bird.
还养了一只鸟
He's like our fourth child.
他就像我们的第四个孩子
You have a date? Who is it? The widow Bagley?
你要去约会?是谁?寡妇巴格利?
Has she gotten feeling back on her left side yet?
她左半身子现在有知觉了么?
No, she's still half-tingle.
没有 她还半瘫着
No, my date is considerably younger
不是寡妇啦 我的约会对象年轻多了
and I just wanted to get your input
我只是想咨♥询♥一下
on what attire you might think would be appropriate.
你觉得合适的约会服装什么样的?
Where are you taking her?
你要带她去哪里约会?
Well, I thought I'd invite her over to my new pad.
我想着可以邀请她去我们家
Ah, I little Netflix and chill?
啊哈 看看奈飞打打炮哈?
Stop that Martian talk.
说人话
No, we'll be having dinner and drinks.
不 我们准备一起享用晚餐再来点酒
Then keep it caj. Just wear jeans.
那就随意点吧 就牛仔裤
Dungarees? Well, I'm not a long-haul trucker.
粗布工装裤? 我可不是开长途的卡车司机
Jeans are very in. You should go see Alexa.
牛仔裤非常时髦的 你应该去找阿莉克莎
She'll fix you up. It's where I get all my clothes.
她会搞定你的服装的 我都在她那儿买♥♥衣服的
I'll go anyway.
好吧反正我也要去找她
Hello, Mr. Dobbs. Hi there.
又见面了 多布斯先生 你好啊
I knew if I let you escape, you'd lead me to Damien.
我知道如果我放你走 你就会带我找到达米安
You lied to me.
你骗了我
I can see how it looks that way.
我能理解对你来说看起来好像是那么回事
But I didn't kill him.
但是我没有杀他
And yet you knew he was dead and buried.
但是你知道他死了并且被埋了
Yes, and let me be the first to say
是的 首先请允许我对于你的损失
how sorry I am for your loss.
表示深深的抱歉
I don't give a shit about him.
我并不在乎他
What I want is that watch.
我想要的是那块表
Inside is a microchip with numbers to a Cayman Island
里面芯片上存着一个开曼群岛银行账户
bank account worth killing over.
这值得杀死任何人
Easy now.
冷静
Clearly I don't have the watch or I wouldn't be here.
很明显我没有表 否则我不会在这里
Right, but you know who does.
对的 但是你知道谁拿走了它
And you're gonna get it for me
而且你会把它拿给我
or I'm going to put a bullet in the redhead
否则我就一枪杀死那个红头发的人
I saw you hugging this morning.
今早我看见你们抱在一起了
Go ahead. I don't care about her.
去吧 我又不在乎她
You know, for a con man, you're a terrible liar.
你知道吗 作为一个骗子 你撒谎的技术可不怎么样
That's hurtful.
真伤人
Okay! I'll get you your watch.
好的! 我会给你拿到那块表
Just... I'm gonna need a little time.
只是...我需要一些时间
A little time is all you and she will get.
时间是你们唯一可以得到的东西
Just invite him to prom. You can do this.
只是邀请他去毕业舞会 你可以做到的
It's gotta be to world's worst secret
这应该是世界上最糟糕的秘密
It was never a question
这从来都不是一个问题
I'm not even trying to keep it
我甚至没有尝试去藏住它
If I could get your attention
如果我能吸引你的注意
About you
关于你
Dora? Uh, what, Russell?
朵拉? 怎么了 拉塞尔?
Will you go to prom with me?
你愿意做我的舞伴去毕业舞会吗?
Uh... Please, please, please.
额... 拜托了
Don't make me beg.
不要让我求你
Please?
可以吗?
Okay. Yes.
好吧 真棒
A little miracle
一个小小的奇迹
A spark inside your--
你心中的火花
Hey.
你好
There's my loyal, overworked assistant
我忠实的 过度劳累的助手
who should really get out of town for a while.
真应该出城去透透气
How about you take a month-long vacation starting right now?
你休一个月的假吧 现在开始 如何?
Um, and sit alone in a hotel room
然后一个人坐在酒店房♥间里
thinking about what could have been?
幻想着本可能发生的事?
No thank you.
不用了 谢谢你
Or sit alone by the pool
或者一个人在游泳池边坐着
and think about what could have been.
想着可能发生点什么.
Um, I freckle in the sun.
我在太阳下会生雀斑
Your voicemail said you had a new lead.
你给我留言说有新线索
Please tell me it worked out.
请告诉我已经解决了
No dice.
还没
Ray said that if he did not get his money today,
雷说如果他今天没有拿到他的钱
he was gonna burn down the church.
他就把教堂烧掉
What church? The one you're the pastor of.
哪个教堂? 你做牧师的那个
Oh, right. He's not bluffing, Buddy.
哦对哦 他不是在吓唬你 巴迪
Ray spent eight years in jail for arson.
雷因为纵火在监狱呆了八年
If he burns down that beautiful church,
如果他烧了那个教堂
I will never forgive myself.
我永远都不会原谅我自己
Look, I'm not gonna let anything happen to the church
听着 我不会让教堂发生任何事
or you.
你也不会
Just...call Ray.
你先…打给雷
tell him to meet you at your store in an hour.
告诉他一小时后来你商店见你
I needed that hour to call every pawn shop in the state
我需要用那一小时打电♥话♥给每个当铺
to see if anyone had hocked Damien's watch,
询问是否有人典当了达米安的手表
but I came up empty.
但是我空手而归
Alden, what's taking so long?
奥尔登 你怎么花了那么长时间?
If you don't come out, I am coming in.
如果你再不出来 我要进去了
These slacks are ridiculous. There's no pleats.
这些长裤都很奇怪 没有裤褶
They're jeans and they look great on you.
它们是牛仔并且很适合你
Oh, well, I don't know.
好吧 我也不清楚
Maybe I should try something else.
或许我应该试试其它的
Do you have any jeans without denim?
你们有不是粗斜布料的牛仔裤吗
No. Trust me, you look very stylish.
不 相信我 你看上去很时髦
Yeah, well, you're just trying to sell me.
好吧 你只是尽力推销给我
Well, here, you sir.
好吧 先生
What do you think of these blue jeans?
你觉得这条蓝色牛仔怎么样?
You make 'em work.
适合你
I'll take 'em.
买♥♥了
Uh, I assume you take Diners Club.
你们这收大来卡(一种信♥用♥卡♥)的吧
You can wear 'em out. Pay me later.
你可以穿出去 回头再付钱
I expect the friends and family discount.
我要享受亲友折扣哦
You got my 20 Gs?
你准备好我的2万刀了?
My jeans are beeping.
我这新牛仔裤在叫
Keep going, they're fine. Let me put it another way.
直接出去 不要管他们 让我换一种方式说
You better have my 20 Gs.
你最好已经准备好了我的2万刀
Hey there, Ray.
你好啊 雷
What are you doing here?
你在这干嘛?
Alexa says you threatened to burn down the church tonight.
阿莉克莎说今晚你威胁要烧了教堂
We both know you're not gonna do that.
我们都知道你不会那样做
Yeah? Why is that?
为什么呢?
Because one, it doesn't get you your money.
首先 这样并不能让你拿到钱
And two, you don't have the balls, Sparky.
其次 你没这个胆量 还真把自己当喷火小精灵了
Buddy.
巴迪
Is that right?
你这样想哦?
Have you lost your mind?
你疯了吗?
Now he's definitely going to try and torch the church.
现在他肯定会去烧教堂了
Let's hope so.
那最好是了
So?
怎样?
I say with go with chocolate chip
我觉得煎大赛就用
for the pancake eating contest.
这个巧克力碎的了
That is exactly what I said.
英雄所见略同
Didn't I say that, Russell?
我是不是这么说来这 拉塞尔?
I didn't hear you say that. I said it.
没听到你说啊 我说了
Ooh, this is... kind of silly,
喔 说来有点蠢哈
but I feel like I should, um, tell you
但是我想还是要告诉你
back in high school, I came this close
高中的时候 我就差这么一点点就要
to asking you to prom.
邀你去舞会了
That's crazy because I was going to ask you to prom too.
真巧 因为我也想邀你去舞会
No way. Way.
不可能吧 可能啊
Okay, let's focus on the present, people.
回到现实吧 同志们