老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother S06E20
Part 1
Oct. 23, 2020, 9:48 a.m.
Kids, as you know,
孩子们 如你们所知
i was still designing Goliath National Bank's new headquarters
我为巨人国家银行设计的新大楼
on the site of old hotel of The Arcadian,
选址在古老的阿卡迪亚酒店
Problem was, some people didn't want The Arcadian tore down.
可问题是 有些人不想让这酒店被毁
Even bigger problem, they were led by my girlfriend Zoey.
更大的问题是 我的女朋友苏伊是这些人的领头
G-N-B is the e-ne-my!
巨人银行 势不两立
Oh, hang on, hang on, hang on! Hey, sweetie!
等等等等 嗨 亲爱的
Are we still on for dinner at 8:00 at Valenzisi's?
我们约了8点在瓦伦希斯晚餐哟
That's great! I can't wait!
太好了 我迫不及待了
That's great. I can't wait!
太好了 我迫不及待了
That's great. I can't wait!
太好了 我迫不及待了
But somehow, Zoey and I were making it work.
但无论如何 这并没影响我和苏伊的感情
Ted, why are you dating our arch-enemy?!
泰德 你为什么要跟我们的死敌在一起
I mean, Wile E. Coyote wasn't trying
我是说 大笨狼怀尔就不会跟
to sleep with the Roadrunner.
必必鸟睡在一起
Or maybe he was.
也许他会呢
Think about it.
好好想想
The way that she bats her eyelashes
她在他面前那样抛媚眼
and shakes her tail feathers in his face?
扭动她尾巴上的羽毛
She wants it.
她很饥渴
Isn't it hard for you guys to be on opposite sides
在这种大事上 你们意见相左
of something like this?
不会影响感情吗
Of course you feel that way, Lily.
你当然这么觉得 莉莉
You and Marshall have basically melded
你和马修基本已经融合成
into one big hermaphroditic blob.
雌雄同体的整体了
And that's fine for you guys.
这对你们来说很好
But some of us want
但我们有些人会想要一个
a partner who challenges us to grow and evolve.
能跟我们对着干的伴侣 好让我们成长进步
You guys are in screaming matches all the time.
你们俩总是吵架 还总是在比看谁大声
Uh-uh, uh-uh, uh-uh.
不对不对
Growing matches.
我们是成长比赛
It was true.
这是真的
Zoey and I loved to challenge each other.
我和苏伊喜欢跟对方对着干
The main character is a young spoiled prince
主角是一位年少被宠坏的王子
thrust into leadership after the death of his father.
在父亲去世后 奋发担起领袖之职
It's obviously a modern-day retelling of Henry IV!
这显然是现代版的《亨利四世》
Are you kidding me?!
你开什么玩笑
It's Don Quixote-- the classic quest story
这明明是《堂吉诃德》 经典的探险故事
with the hero-jester and his long-suffering manservant!
不过主角是一个小丑和他苦不堪言的仆人
Okay, clearly, when we're watching Tommy Boy,
好了 很显然 我们看《乌龙兄弟》的时候
we're watching two different movies.
看到的是两部不同的电影
No, you hang up.
不 你先挂
No, you hang up.
不 你先挂
No, you hang up.
不 你挂
No, you hang up.
不 你挂
No, you hang up!
不 你挂吧
No, you hang up.
不 你挂吧
No, you hang up.
不 还是你挂
No, you...
不 还是你...
Hold on.
等等
Hello?
喂
For the love of God, will one of you idiots
看在上帝的份上 你们俩白♥痴♥
hang up the phone?
谁先把电♥话♥挂了吧
Why would you do that?!
你干嘛这样
I-I thought you'd like it.
我以为你会喜欢
Who likes that?
谁会喜欢这样
I like it.
我就喜欢
Your relationship sounds exhausting.
你们的关系听起来太劳神了
Well, maybe yours is a bit lazy.
也许是你们的太安逸了
Marshall and I have been together 15 years,
马修和我在一起15年
and the only debate we've had about Tommy Boy
我们关于《乌龙兄弟》唯一的争论只在于
is whether it's awesome or super awesome.
它是很棒呢 还是超级棒呢
That's love, bitch.
这才是爱 小样
Now around this time,
在此期间
Marshall had truly come to hate his job.
马修变得十分厌恶他的工作
He hated the paperwork.
他讨厌看不完的报告
He hated the coffee.
他讨厌这里的咖啡
He hated the dirty jokes.
他讨厌黄段子
He hated everything.
他无所不厌
I have to quit.
我得辞职
Quit GNB?! Why?
离开巨人国家银行 为什么
I need to do better things with my life, okay?
我得用我的人生 去做更有益的事
There's-There's an opening for an environmental lawyer
国家保护资源委员会
at the National Resources Defense Council.
在招聘一名环境律师
Sure, it pays less, but
当然 收入会减少 但是
I'd be saving the oceans,
那样我就可以去挽救海洋
saving endangered species...
挽救频临灭绝的物种...
Saving chicken bones and an old boot to make hobo soup?
再讨些鸡骨头和旧靴子来做流浪汤吗
Marshall, you can't pay your mortgage
马修 儿戏和一时冲动
with Hacky Sacks and good vibes.
可没法帮你还房♥贷
Baby, you have my full support.
宝贝 我全力支持你
Well, then, you're not going to be able to pay
好吧 你们计划已久的西班牙之旅
for that trip to Spain that you've been planning.
你也付不起费用了
Say good-bye
再也别想再
to riding around in Gondolas,
凤尾船上巡游[意大利威尼斯的小船]
and eating bratwurst
吃着大热狗[德国产]
and seeing the pyramids.
欣赏金字塔的美景
I don't think you know what Spain is.
我想你对西班牙一无所知吧
Well, I know that a trip there costs
好吧 可我知道要花上
some serious lira.
一大笔里拉[意大利货币]
It's dinero.
是迪内罗[西语中"钱"的叫法]
Where? I want his autograph!
在哪 我想要他的签名
So Marshall walked in the next morning all ready to quit.
第二天早晨 马修准备好去辞职
But then something weird happened.
但怪事发生了
** I will remember you... *
*我会记住你
Suddenly, he didn't hate the paperwork.
突然间 他不讨厌报告了
He didn't hate the coffee.
不讨厌咖啡了
He didn't even hate the dirty jokes.
甚至不讨厌黄段子了
Out of nowhere, Marshall actually liked GNB.
不知怎地 马修真的喜欢上了巨人银行
It's graduation goggles. What?
这是毕业假象 什么
Graduation goggles, like with high school.
毕业假象 比如高中的时候
It's four years of bullies
四年间 戴着牙箍的孩子们
making fun of all the kids with braces,
哪怕是在牙箍取掉 一切正常之后
even after the braces come off and they can walk just fine.
都一直被学校里的混球们取笑
But then, on graduation day,
但后来 到了毕业的那天
you suddenly get all misty because you realize
你突然变得很伤感 因为你意识到
you're never going to see those jerks again.
你再也看不到这些混♥蛋♥了
I just had graduation goggles
我就对之前约会过的那个史酷比
with that guy Scooby I dated.
产生过毕业假象
The guy who was basically a dog?
那本质上是条狗的家伙
He was the worst kisser I've ever been with.
他是我遇过最烂的接吻对象
But the moment I decided to dump him...
但就在我决定甩了他的那一刻
** I will remember you... *
*我会记住你
...I suddenly got kind of wistful.
我突然有点不舍
He was a good boy.
他是个好孩子[此句经常用来夸狗狗]
Yeah.
是啊
I've been there, too.
我也经历过
Every time I'm done having sex with a woman,
每次我跟一个女人上过床之后
at first, I never want to see her again.
一开始 我会再也不想看到她
But then...
但后来
** I will remember you... *
*我会记住你
No, that's pretty much it.
不 就这样吧
The point is, you can't trust graduation goggles.
重点是 你不能相信毕业假象
They're just as misleading as beer goggles,
他们就像啤酒假象
bridesmaid goggles,
伴娘假象
and that's-just-a-bulky, outdated-cell-phone
和"那只是一只过时巨型的大哥大
in-his-front-pocket goggles.
放在他前插袋"而造成大老二的假象一样
That one was a bummer.
只不过这条更让人扫兴
You're right.
你说的对
Tomorrow, I'm quitting GNB.
明天 我就去辞职
老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother
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